How had he ended up in this predicament again?
Oh yes, America had forced him to tag along. Well; not really forced so much as used the 'puppy eyes' on him and pleaded until Canada had no choice but to submit.
He snapped out of his thoughts as America tapped his shoulder, "Dude, we're here." A childish grin formed on America's face as they stepped out of the car.
"America, this is an awful idea," Canada whimpered. "What happens if Japan comes home while we're here?" His brother was such a hoser; where did he even get this idea from?
"Where do you think we can get in at? If Japan doesn't have a key anywhere, I guess I could-"
Canada cut off his brother sharply, "Alfred F. Jones, no breaking Japan's property!"
Said nation turned towards his brother and stuck out his tongue, "Yeah, yeah. I hear ya, Mattie." He grabbed Canada's hand afterwards and dragged him up Japan's walkway.
When they reached the front door, Alfred began picking up small decorations around the porch in search of a key. Matthew rolled his eyes and sighed, 'The sooner we get this over with, the better,' and began helping in the search. After five minutes of a fruitless search, Alfred groaned dramatically, "Ugh, we're wasting time!" They both sat on the steps of the large front porch to think. Canada found himself admiring the Japanese rock garden while his brother whined.
Alfred spoke after a moment, "Do you have any ideas, bro?"
Matthew inhaled deeply, "No. This was your stupid-" No. It was far too cliché. But, the one place they had yet to look was-
"The mat! It's under the mat!" America gave a triumphant yell and snatched the key from its hiding spot. He inserted and turned the key with shaky fingers.
They had already wasted so much time and they had to be quick; who knew when Japan would be home?
The entire situation pumped adrenaline through America's body. This was exhilarating; although the thought of Japan catching them was scary, it added to the fun. He shook his head and focused on the task at hand. As soon as the door creaked open, Alfred sped through the opening; with an annoyed Canada trailing behind.
"C'mon! We gotta hurry, Canada," America urged, snatching the other's hand and racing up the steps. Once they reached the second floor, several rooms were before them.
"Which one d'ya think is Keeks' room?" America asked, bouncing on the balls on his feet.
Canada sighed once more, "I'll check the left; you check the right." At that suggestion, America turned to the room on the right that was near him while Canada went left.
Alfred entered the room and was disappointed to find that it was a bathroom. He had always used the one downstairs when he came over... "Might as well look around then." He checked the stack of magazines and manga piled neatly in a bin near the toilet and was surprised to find nothing pornographic.
"That kinda stuff will probably be in his room," America grinned. He was reminded of the main mission and exited the room promptly, closing the door behind him. Canada was waiting for him in the hallway with an annoyed expression.
"What took you so long?"
As America began to open his mouth in reply, the other cut him off and shook his head, "Never mind. Anyways, I checked the other doors over here, so that last one at the end of the hallway must be his bedroom." Matthew said, gesturing down the hall at the final door.
"Sweet!" Alfred ran ahead and burst through the door.
Once again, Matthew cursed himself and his brother for getting ensnarled in this dumb plan.
"I just realized I've never been in Japan's room either," America gawked, looking around the room in mild fascination. Japan's room was incredibly tidy. Everything had a place, so he'd have to make sure to avoid messing things up, or Japan was bound to notice. The walls were stark white for the exception of a beautiful mural of cherry blossom trees painted against the wall where Japan's bed was.
"He probably never let you in here because he knew you'd do something like this," Canada grunted in reply.
"Ha ha," Alfred responded dryly, looking over the rest of the room.
Japan's room was almost entirely traditional, the bed was even a futon with a weird, uncomfortable-looking pillow thing. America examined it curiously. 'Huh.'
The floor was also that tatami-stuff, America believed it was called, but then again, all the flooring in the house looked like that.
"While you are being a pervert, I'll keep a lookout for Japan," there was an exasperated expression on his face as Matthew walked to the window, but Alfred failed to notice.
"Thanks, bro!" the other smiled in response as he went towards the drawers in Japan's room. He paused when his hand was on the handle. 'I should save the main event for last.' A mischievous smirk spread across his face. He knew his friend was pretty interesting, so he was certain to have stuff in his closet. America bounded over to the closet and briskly opened it. The closet was of decent size, and filled with plastic boxes. Each box had a label, but it was all in Japanese kanji. "Guess I'll have to open each one then," America mumbled.
He ran a hand down his face; there were so many! It would take forever to look through them all. The hero needed his sidekick! "Canada, help me look in here, would ya?"
"I'm not helping you look through his underwear," Canada turned and gave a dramatic groan, "You said you just wanted to do a panty raid!"
"Well, yeah, but this is Japan," America stressed the country's name. "He's bound to have some kinky stuff in here! Or maybe a new video game he's hiding from me!"
Canada was silent for a moment before walking over to his brother, "Fine. I'll help," As America's grin widened, Canada snarled, "But if he comes home, it's all your fault."
Alfred was too busy giggling like a school boy to even take his brother's warning seriously. But, then again, he didn't really take Canada seriously anyways. America opened the first bin in front of him and found nothing but manga. Disappointed, he slid the bin out of the closet to get to the others. Canada opened the bin closest to him and was relieved when it was nothing but video games.
After pushing ten other containers out of the closet, there were four bins left at the back. The twins walked into the space and nudged past Japan's clothing.
"Dude," America beamed. "These are at the back. That means this is the good stuff!"
"You are such a child."
They sat on the floor and Alfred quickly pried the lid off of the container to his left.
Their eyes widened dramatically at the contents; pornographic manga and games. One pile had games, while the other had manga and magazines.
America beamed, "Fuck yeah, dude!" He reached out and grabbed the one on top. This manga had a pink cover with two half-naked men on the cover. Alfred curiously flipped open the front page and Canada watched, leaning over his brother's arm to get a better look. Neither of them could read it, but the situation was pretty clear. A faint blush spread across their faces as they gaped at the page. The two men had been talking, then the taller of the two men grabbed the shorter one and pulled him into a deep kiss.
Alfred licked his lips timidly and flipped ahead a few pages.
Now, the two men were undressing each other and sloppily making out. Alfred turned to the next page slowly. The taller man pushed the other man onto the bed and ripped off his underwear. Then, he proceeded to reach into the bedside drawer and pull out a small bottle.
Slightly aroused but also uncomfortable, Alfred and Matthew both placed the book back in the pile. There was a moment of awkward silence before Canada whispered, "L-let's move on to the next box."
America agreed and gingerly placed the top back on the bin and slid it into place. This time Canada grabbed the second box. He didn't even realize that he was getting so sucked into this.
As soon as Canada lifted the lid, America gasped. This box was full of outfits!
Alfred grabbed the one on top and held it out for them both to look at. Canada gave a quiet chuckle, "Do you think he wears this sometimes?"
"Of course!" America replied, drooling over the mental image in his head. Japan, wearing a short little maid outfit and prancing around, cleaning the house while humming a Vocaloid song aloud.
Canada snorted and placed the maid dress to the side along with the accessories before snatching the next article of clothing. He pulled out a small, navy blue pleather vest with a golden badge attached to the left breast and handed it to the other blonde. Along with it, there was a matching hat with a badge, tiny matching booty shorts, and black high heels.
"He can arrest me anytime," America drawled, staring at the outfit hungrily.
Canada gave him a light slap to the arm, snapping him out of his perverted daydreams. "You're gross," He scolded.
As Matthew set aside the police costume, Alfred pulled out the next garment; a school girl uniform. America held up the short skirt with an amused grin, "I can't believe he actually has this stuff."
Canada agreed with a small smile, "It's like a bad stereotype or something." Wait a second, this wasn't what they were here for! Damn America for side tracking him.
"Alfred, can we get what you came here for so we can leave?"
The other rolled his eyes, "Yeah, fine, in a second," America lit up as he noticed there was still one more box left. "But first…"
Canada groaned, "Fine. You have five minutes."
The brothers' mouths hung open when America removed the final box's lid.
Chains, whips, dildos, vibrators, handcuffs, anal beads, cock rings, butt plugs, nipple clamps, vibrator wands, and everything someone's perverted mind could possibly think of.
"Duuuuuude," America drawled, whistling at the ginormous amount of sex toys within the box. Before Canada could stop him, his brother reached into the box and grabbed an item at random.
"I always knew Japan was kinky," He held up the vibrator. "but I never knew he was this kinky."
"America! Stop it; we need to leave!" Canada yelped, slapping the object from his brother's hands. The vibrator fell to the floor with a clunk and buzzed to life; bumping across the floor.
Canada scrambled to the object and rushed to click it off. He held it away from himself by the cord and dropped it back into the box.
After a long pause, he glared at America, "Pick some underwear, and then we're going."
"Aww, but Mattie!"
"No! No buts. Hurry up. I'll put all," Canada gestured towards the boxes strewn across the room. "Of this back."
America sighed, walking over to the dresser once again. "You take the fun out of everything, Mattie."
As soon as America opened the first drawer, he reached in and grabbed a handful of underwear, glancing at them and finding one he liked. There was a pair of blue ones with lace; oh yes, those were nice. He quickly shoved that pair into his jacket.
The second pair were some plain green boxers. Boring. He placed those back into the drawer. The third pair were another pair of boxers. Lame. Those went back into the drawer as well.
"America! We need to go! I think Japan is-!"
Both twins froze as they heard footsteps against the staircase. They looked at each other with wide eyes; that had to be Japan!
America shoved a second pair of underwear in his jacket and slammed the drawer shut. There were still boxes out, but there was no time to finish putting them away!
Canada and America both scrambled for the window, it was the only way out now. In a panicked daze, America punched through the window with ease.
As Alfred finished clearing away the glass shards, the footsteps were getting louder.
America went to climb out the opening when Canada held up his hand and hissed, "I get to go first; you dragged me into this!"
Matthew was half-way out the window when the door opened.
Japan stood in the doorway; his mouth open in shock, as he saw everything all at once. Boxes from his closet were laying around the room, and Japan felt panic rising in his chest at the thought of others seeing the contents of very particular boxes in that closet.
Next, he saw that his window had been smashed, and now there were glass shards embedded in his tatami floor.
Finally, he saw the intruders and the cause of the mess. Shakily, he spoke, "Canada-san, America-san, what are you doing?"
Japan hoped that maybe they had been protecting his house or something, but he knew they had broken in. For what, though?
America gave a nervous laugh, "Hey, Kiku, buddy! It's ah, not what it looks like…?" He trailed off lamely.
Canada crawled back into the room and hung his head in shame, "I'm so sorry, Japan! It's all America's fault!"
Alfred looked over at his brother, agape, "Dude, you threw me under the bus!"
"I told you I would!" Matthew glared, "And that's because this was your idea!"
"To be fair, it was actually France's idea."
"What are you doing here?!" Japan screeched, balling his hands into fists. "What idea are you talking about?!"
America held up his hands in front of him as surrender. "Listen, Japan. I'm not gonna lie to you."
And then America threw himself out of the window.
Well, at least he hadn't lied. The blonde nation was able to land on his feet. After checking to make sure he still had both pairs of undergarments in his jacket, he shouted, "Canada, c'mon! I'll catch you!"
Japan and Canada stared at each other for what felt like an hour, but it was only two minutes before Japan spoke, "Please, Canada-san. What were you doing here?"
Canada knew that if he told Japan what he and America were really doing here, then his brother would hate him forever because then Japan would know about America's huge crush on him. But at the same time, he didn't want to lie to Japan. Ugh, why did this have to be so difficult?
"We were in here because…" Canada paused, looking away from Japan. "I'll tell you later okay?"
The blonde nation scrambled to the window and jumped into his brother's waiting arms. Once America set Canada down, the troublesome nation went to start the car, and left his brother standing below the window.
"Japan, I swear I'll tell you one day, okay?"
The black-haired nation nodded and turned away from the window. He needed to clean this mess up.