Plot 0-1
A small dark room fills the area as a bright spotlight shines down illuminating a bright white circle and a man standing in the middle. The man looked straight, as if he could see through the fourth wall and look directly at the audience. The man then became more clear and the image of the man shown was of Kefka from Final Fantasy VI. Kefka grinned and said, "Welcome ladies and gentlemen, I am your god, Kefka, the star of this stupid little story based bullcrap." Kefka then frowned and said, "Yea I said bullcrap! Alert the presses a fucking bad guy fucking swore! On the fucking internet!" Kefka then clear his throat then added, "Now that, that is out of the way I might as well introduce you to a new series here from this lazy ass author. It is called Final Fantasy X-ing and the star is…" Kefka then presented himself in a fancy fashion and said, "Well, you're looking at the smexy son of a bitch." Kefka then sighed heavily and said, "Now I'm here to tell you about the whole premise of the story…which is basically about balls all. That's why this plot is called Plot 0." Kefka then looked behind him and said, "Now then, let's fucking make magic happen…" Kefka then stood there a few minutes then yelled, "Hey, oh lazy ass creator, put the fucking screen up so I can explain this bullshit!" Just then a giant screen appeared and it showed static like a television would. Kefka sighed then looked back and sternly added, "We don't have cable or satellite, so bare with me or go the fuck home."
The screen then adjusted and it showed a lovely little street. The scene slowly moves into the picture until it becomes the only thing visible. Kefka's voice then started to explain. "This is the town of Lugar, a place where Final Fantasies go and die or retire or some bull crap. Each game has their own house…well almost all games, our creator only played five through ten two then twelve. Why he played ten two? Only horny fanboys will know." The scene then showed a nice lovely street and Kefka started to talk again. "Now this is Santa Cruz street, where all the action takes place, and where all the other idiots live…and I do mean idiots." Kefka then popped in and said, "Now this is where I also live in the most bad-ass house in the world!" The scene then cut to a house shaped like a heart with a snow white field and dancing teddy bears singing. Kefka looked back at the house and yelled, "The fuck!?" Kefka then looked up and yelled, "You give me my damn house or so help me I will condemn you to hell the hard way!" The scene then cut to another house similarly shaped like a dark haunted house in cartoons. Kefka looked at his house and said, "Ah…home sweet home…the place where I call the shots and anyone defies me gets to talk with reason and honesty." Kefka then raised his left fist and said, "This is reason," then lifted the other fist and added, "And this is honesty."
Kefka then said, "Alright I'm starting to get sick of the way you ass wipes smell, so I'm going to cut it short and say goodbye for now. Next time I'll tell you who lives with me in my house, and…" Suddenly Kuja, from Final Fantasy IX, pops in with a collar on his neck and asked, "Hey Kefka, is it my turn to get introduced?" Kefka looked at Kuja coldly and yelled, "Get the fuck back to the house this, now!" Kuja then scampered away frightened and Kefka sighed and said, "Alright get out of here…I'm gonna go get some aspirin and maybe slay a few innocent people along the way." With the Kefka leaves with a lowered head and the spotlight fades to black.