Disclaimer: I don't Inuyasha or the song Cheating on You, by Franz Ferdinand.
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Goodbye girl
Because I'm lonely
I screwed up this time. I completely and seriously fucked up this time. Because, I made her cry . . . again. And now, she's leaving me, again. I don't want her to leave me here, I never want her to leave my side. But tonight, she had made it clear, this would be her last visit, she'd seal the well and never return . . . it was the way it was meant to be. The jewel was complete, and I was to go to hell with Kikyou.
Goodbye girl
It isn't over
But what if I didn't want to go to hell, what if I wanted to stay here . . . with her. Her mere presences leaves me at ease, the simplest of touches send tingling bolts down my spine. The time I spend with her feels like no other. When I'm with her, a possessive side of me shows, when I'm with her I want to keep her safe, even from the tiniest of scratches. This feeling I get with her is undescribably, something I have never felt towards Kikyou. Sure I protected her with my life, but I never felt the urgency I do when saving Kagome . . . it's never the same.
Goodbye girl
Because it's only love
Kagome once told me, she would stay by my side no matter what. Told me she would never stop loving me, and truth be told, I really wanted to love her in the same devoting way. But then there's my promise to Kikyou, I promised I would follow her into the pits of hell, promised I would never stop loving her. At times I really do hate Kikyou for that, for ruining any future life I could ever have . . . and then I am instantly ashamed. Because, I'm suppose to love Kikyou, not Kagome.
Goodbye girl
You know you own me
Kagome, such a beautiful name, for such a beautiful lady. Sure, I make fun of her constantly, shoot her down with snide comments, but I never really mean them. How can I? Such lovely passionate brown eyes, breath taking inky black hair, with a fiery attitude that knows no limits. I would do anything to see her smile, just to make her happy. But seeing her cry like this, just tears me up in side, especially knowing her pain came from my actions. She had caught me, embracing Kikyou.
Goodbye girl
Yes I'm a loser
The others, always question why I go back to Kikyou late at night, even after all the damage she's done to not only me, but Kagome. I'd be lying to you if I said it was because I love her, because I don't. She was just my first lover, the first person to ever accept me, and yet she didn't. She wanted me to turn human with the jewel, something I know Kagome would never ask. And I know that doesn't accuse the matter, but that's the only reason I can think of, that she was my first everything. First friend, lover, even foe. In a way she taught me more, then I am willing to admit.
Goodbye girl
You know it's only love
I want to go over there and comfort her. Go over to where she stand near the sacred tree. I slowly walk over there, wanting to explain myself, just wanting to be near her, let her know, that the embrace didn't mean anything. I just want to so desperately crush her to my chest, to whisper sweet nothings in her ear, make her understand. Make her see, that I don't want her to leave, especially on terms like this. This wasn't how it was suppose to be, it wasn't supposed to be this way. Dammit it all to hell.
I reach out my hand to her, wanting to push back stray hairs, but my hand slowly withdraws, as she looks up at me with red puffy eyes. I instantly feel guilty, and the wrenching of my heart comes back at ful force. Her pained expression is slowly killing me, "Please Kagome . . . . Just smile," I beg. I can't handle the sight of her like this, can't stand the pain in her eyes, and I know, know it was caused by me.
I'm cheating on you
I'm cheating on you
She only whispered out one pleading word, but it left me speechless. "Why?" she breathed, looking deep into my eyes for an answer.
How could I answer her that? There was no answer for that. No explanations, not even a lame excuse to cover up with, there was simply nothing, not even lust. So I answered her honestly, "I don't know," I whispered, looking down at the ground.
I'm cheating on you
You're cheating on me
But when I looked back up to meet her eyes, I only saw rage and sorrow. She took one threatening step toward me, and I let her, and then she soundlessly slapped me, with a vegence. The slap would've sent Sango to shame, with all it's force. I don't even think she knew why she had hit me, but whatever the reason was I am sure I deserved it. But what surprised me even more then the slap, was when tears sprang into her eyes, and . . . . she hugged me.
Goodbye girl
You are the only one
Her form started to shake with suppressed sobs, as she grabs onto my haori, burring her face in my shoulder. My arms snaked their way down her hips, and I held her close, she was my life line, and I knew that if I let her go, I would die. I was gently rubbing my hands up and down her back, whispering a few 'It's going to be ok, I'm here now' and 'I'm so sorry Kagome, please just stop crying'.
If I have any weakness, it's a woman crying, something inside me snaps, and my heart just wrenches. But, when Kagome cries, the pain comes back 10 fold. It's so painful to see her cry, it's hard to breath. I'm drowning in the smell of her salty tears, and even when she calms down, I can still smell the stench of her tears, something I never want to get use to.
Goodbye girl
Although you own me
"I'm so sorry Kagome, I never wanted to hurt you," I finally whisper in her ear, smoothing her hair.
She's quiet for a long time, so quiet I'm starting to get scarred. Scarred at the thought of losing her, even though I know I already have down the long road.
"I know Inuyasha, I know,"she finally murmurs softly, pulling back to look at me.
But she doesn't know, she doesn't know how sorry I am. How sorry I am that I make her cry at night, when she thinks no ones around, sorry that I can't admit my own feelings, sorry that we can't be together. She doesn't know. She doesn't know this inner turmoil I suffer with.
Goodbye girl
You only owe me love
They say, actions speak louder then words. Because if I told her I was sorry, I don't think she would ever truly believe me. And as she stares at me with her expressive eyes, something inside me stirs. This undescribable, urgent emotion. And as my gaze lowers from her eyes to her mouth, I suddenly want to kiss her, because I want show her, how very truly sorry I am.
I lower my head, closing my eyes. Just to feel her lips on mine, just for one parting moment. And as my head dips down, my lips come in contact with something warm, and I feel her stiffen in my arms. But as I lick her bottom lip, demanding entrance, she is soon putty in my embrace, as she parts her lips for me, throwing her arms arounf my neck. I pour everything I am into that kiss, everything I feel inside me. My tongue is exploring her mouth, tracing over her molars and running it over the roof of her mouth, nothing has tasted sweeter.
Goodbye girl
Well, if you're lonely
As we pull away, her eyes are swimming with emotion, and I am sure mine are too. We starred into each others eyes for a long time, probably looking for answers. Finally she smiles warmly at me, and all my doubtfulness runs away, as I whisper three words, that had been taunting me for weeks, "I love you," I finally say, never wanting this moment to end.
Goodbye girl
Why don't you join me?
And I think it was then, that she finally understood, that I actually did love her, that I didn't want her to leave. "I love you, too." she said, looking up at me happily, with a watery smile plastered to her face.
"Please stay, I beg of you Kagome, just stay here with me." I pleaded, nuzzling my head in the crock her neck, just wanting to freeze time, to always feel her pressed tightly against me.
Goodbye girl
You know it's only love
"Inuyasha, you know I can't," she finally choked out, tears burning down her face all over again.
She held onto me more tightly, clutching at me desperately. If only time could stop, to freeze this perfect moment. But, at least we have this to look back on, something to cherish always, even though it was short lived, that kiss told everything. And it made me realize that once Kagome was gone nothing would truly be the same, after tonight, when she leaves it will never be the same for me.
I'm cheating on you
I'm thinking of you
Kagome finally pulled back, telling me she had to get going. She was suppose to leave yesterday, but rain delayed her. And now that all the goodbyes were said, and Shippo was stocked with a lifetime supply of pocky, I still don't want to let het go, that time was too short, just one more day, one more month, one more year . . . .
I silently walk her to the well, our hands entwined, and my heart feeling heavy. Why did the world have to be so cruel, so unfair. I'm trying to memorize everything little detail about this beautiful creature in front of me, down to the very freckle.
When we finally reached the old Bone Eaters Well, Kagome sat on the lip of the well, swinging her feet and looking sad. It's too soon, I thought desperately to myself.
"I love you, Inuyasha" she whispered looking at me, before falling down the depths of the well.
I'm cheating on you
I'm cheating on me
I knew I should've stopped her, jumped in after her, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Even after the dull pain in my chest started to throb, I couldn't cross times, it was suppose to be like this, and once the well was sealed there was no going back. But no matter how many times I told myself I couldn't believe it, because this wasn't how it was suppose to be. Because it just felt so right, when I was holding her in my arms, felt so very perfect. And the words came so easily, even though they were being pulled form deep within my soul.
As I peered down the well, clutching the lip tightly, my heart starts to beat more rapidly and my vision goes blurry. I briefly wonder why, when I feel a lone tear trickling down the side of my face, 'that tear was for you, Kagome.' I thought silently to myself, as I headed back to Kaedes village, where everyone was sleeping, never turning back around towards the well.
Goodbye girl.
Goodbye Kagome . . . .
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That was it, I hope you all enjoyed. You see I have this new obsession with the band Franz Ferdinand, and I thought if I wrote a songifc, I would become less obsessive, with it. Heh. Slim chance with that. How can I forget those cute British faces?
Please review! Reviews make me happy, and all fuzzy inside!
Sae