Hi, so this is my first time writing fanfiction, I hope characters aren't too OOC, I'd like to have your advice. I'm sure Alice in Wonderland crossovers have already been done, however I really wanted to write my own version of this crossover. Hope you'll like ^^
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Hetare Land
For my dear friend, ironically called Alice.
xXx
It had been a very long day, so little Italy had decided to go to bed early today.
It had been so long since he last slept at home with nii-chan! Feliciano had spent so much time at Germany's house (which the little Italian thought was huge!) that he had seriously missed his big brother. However, Lovino would just not listen, so Feliciano just shrugged it off. His beloved brother would forget it all in the morning!
"Why do you have to come back when you already have that German freak of yours that you like so much?!"
"Germany is nice, but I also like spending time with you, nii-chan! Besides, Germany's house is so big and scary at night, I can't sleep properly!"
And with that, they both settled to bed, Lovino giving a single "hmph." as a reply.
Of course, Feli hadn't mentioned how clinging tightly to a certain German helped him sleep like a log.
The little Italian sank deeper in his covers before falling fast asleep, deep into the meadows of dream...
xXx
"Eeehh? What's this?"
Feliciano looked around him curiously. The first thing that struck him was the fact he was falling. Very, very slowly.
Shelves displayed all round the walls of the tower-shaped hole, surrounding the slowly falling Italian. Or maybe floating would be more accurate, but for now it did not truly matter as Feli's mind was rather on the food displayed on the shelves, which he was looking at hungrily, than what was actually happening.
Eventually, he picked the first thing that came, however throwing it fast away after reading the label:
"Uwaaa!" he whined, "Marmalade is gross! I wish they had pasta!!"
A very loud cracking sound suddenly interrupted the Italian's whimpering.
Ah, the floor must be close enough now. So Feliciano waited to land. He did not know whether the landing would be hard or soft, which is why little Italy hoped he could find out as soon as possible. However this time... he would just not land.
Getting quite impatient, the idea of actually looking down crossed his mind. He nodded promptly as seriously an Italian can, than set about peeking down.
Unfortunately, as he was just starting to do so, he abruptly fell on something that made an awfully loud noise when Feli landed on it. The noise multiplied and strangely sounded like words.
"Ouch, dammit! What did you have to crush on me for, bastard!!?"
xXx
Chapter 1:
Dresses and fishing tears
"Oh? Lovi?" The Italian blinked twice. "What are you doing down here?" He slowly poked his brother on the cheek.
"Wha-!"
Lovino just realized it had been his brother he had earlier insulted. He somehow felt bad about it, though now he had a urge to punch him for asking him such idiotic questions, while still sitting on his back.
"H-how about you?!" he shot back, "What are you doing up there? Get off me!"
The younger Italian swiftly obeyed, strange onomatopoeias floating out of his mouth as he did so.
"Hmph." Romano got up and brushed himself off. Suddenly he posed, realizing his little brother was trying to hold a laugh.
"What is it now?"
Lovino was in a really bad mood, which is nothing new, but most of all he felt horribly lost. The older Italian had no idea where he was, and why, plus seeing his brother didn't really make him feel better.
If this is all just a dream of very poor taste, I'm afraid Spain can't do anything about it… bastard!
No, Romano was really not in a good mood.
Feliciano let out a giggle causing the other to feel even more irritated. Understanding his brother's annoyance, Feli decided to tell him what he considered so amusing.
"Well, nii-chan…"
He would. Just. Not. Stop. Giggling.
"Nii-chan, you're wearing a dress!"
"WHAT!?"
That was it. As usual, feeling destabilized by anger, he started stuttering while trying to yell at his brother. Obviously there was something Feli missed, and Lovino was going to make sure he understood his position.
"S-s-shut up! Besides, I don't know if you noticed, but you're wearing one too, and I'm not making a big fuss out of it!!"
"Eeeh?"
After processing his big brother's words, little Italy looked down. It was true, he hadn't realized it earlier, however he was really wearing a blue dress. Romano's was exactly the same, except for the darker shade of blue. This somehow reminded him the years he had spent living in Austria's house. He remembered having to dress in Hungary's old clothes.
Meanwhile, Lovino was contemplating his brother, whom had stayed silent for way longer than he was used to.
Probably wondering how Potato freak would like the dress. Dammit! Thank God Antonio's not here, I would have to kill him.
"Ve, Lovi."
"Hmm? What?" Lovino eyed the other suspiciously.
"What do we do now?"
Both of them blinked at one another.
"What I mean is…" Feliciano continued, "We probably shouldn't just stand here forever. Maybe we should look around, ne?"
"Whatever you like."
Despite his careless tone, the younger Italian knew his brother was actually interested. He smiled, and with that, they together set about exploring the unknown land.
xXx
"No, no, no, no, no! Oh God, no. I'm late! I might as well run fast if I do not want to be beheaded!"
xXx
"You saw what?!"
"A bunny! Or a person… both in one!"
Feli continued pointing straight in front of him while his big brother was questioning the other's sanity for one too many times. They both stared at the hallway extending itself in front of them. On both sides were a multitude of doors, of all colors, shapes and sizes. Nevertheless, after many tries, the two brothers had concluded every single one of them was locked.
Several steps later, they found a crooked room dressed in white, its only furniture: a table made of glass. Nicely displayed on top of it was a golden key.
Lovino reached out to take it, however it wasn't on the key his fingers stumbled. Fingers crossed, the Italians stared at each other as if the eyes would decide for their owners who would rightfully take the key. None of them seemed to want to let go.
"I love you, Lovi!"
"Not working."
And with that, Lovino roughly pulled the key out of his brother's hand. Feliciano pouted. If it were Ludwig, he would have undoubtedly won. This was so unfair!
From his point of view, Romano guessed the other's thoughts.
"You're doomed for life with me, learn it already!"
He gave a triumphant smile. This felt so good but happened so rarely. He could almost forget he was wearing a dress! Almost… Dammit! Why is there always something to piss me off!?
And of course the world wouldn't let him enjoy the moment. If you could call Feli the world.
"Ve, if you're not going to let me have it, at least do something with it!"
Murder. If only he had the will… and the guts. Nevertheless, he set about trying to open each door. But at his great dismay, the key didn't fit in any of the keyholes. Talk about disappointment. Feliciano who had been closely following his brother like a shadow (Romano would have said like a maggot, but oh, well.) suggested they went around once more. And so they did.
After this double-check, they went back to the crooked room to find a curtain at the end of it. A bizarre small white door was found behind it, and it seemed a perfect fit for the key.
Lovino opened the door, and peeking inside, saw a hallway as small as a rat hole. Kneeling down, he also could see what he imagined a garden.
Both Italians agreed on the fact they would most likely get out of the crooked room, unfortunately the door was so small, one could not even pass his head through it.
Feliciano sadly turned back to the glass table, almost hoping to find another key, looking around expectedly for something new in the room. That was when he found a vile.
Little Italy could read "DRINK ME" on its label, and for no apparent reason, he hastily obeyed. He immediately felt odd.
"FELICIANO!!"
"Ve, Lovi, you became huge just like Germany's house!"
"This is no time to say such nonsense!"
Romano panicked seeing his brother so tiny after he had drunk whatever was in that small bottle.
"Mio fratello, you should drink it too! With this size we can easily go through the door!"
"Well, I'd like to, but you drank all of it!"
Feli seemed troubled by that fact, and Lovi seemed infuriated and panicked at the same time.
Northern Italy did not realize he was walking until He tripped on something real hard and smashed his nose on the perfectly cleaned floor. It looked like a mirror.
Wanting to know the source of his fall, he discovered a glass box which contained a cake. The words "EAT ME" crowned its top. At first, Feli was a tad reluctant to even touch it, for it was awfully colourful just like America's Christmas cakes. However, it seemed pointless to just stare in horror at it, so he gathered all courage he could and put as much cake he was able to in his hands and shoved it in his mouth till it was all gone.
Lovino gaped in horror while he could only stare at his dear brother who kept growing and whining.
"Uhwaa! Full of chemicals!! I'm going to die~!!!"
"S-s-stop crying, Feli, I'm begging you! We'll never be able to go through the door if you keep on whining. Besides, look at the bright side: you've stopped growing!"
Despite Southern Italy's efforts to cheer up his little brother, the other remained unconvinced.
How was he supposed to hug Ludwig if he now was even taller than Russia? He wasn't even sure he could pass the door of his house, and- OH MY GOD, he could not see his feet! And if it wasn't enough, he was sure he would die of chemicals overdose. The cake had been a flashing pink and blue, it probably also glowed in the dark.
xXx
"Oh my, oh dear! What kind of monstrous creature is able to make so much noise?! Ah, I don't have time to check, I'm awfully late!"
xXx
The sound of hurried footsteps echoed on the crooked walls, which made Italy's crying immediately cease, along with his brother's severe repressing. Soon enough passed by a rabbit-anthro, white paws with brown hair and emerald eyes shining with anxiety, mumbling about a furious Duchess. He absently looked up at Feliciano and Lovino without noticing them, but soon jumped and sped up in realization before any of the Italians could say a thing.
The sound of his footsteps drowned in oblivion, and silence remained until Romano finally broke it:
"Wait, don't we know that guy from somewhere?"
"He looks like Lithuania, but if I recall correctly, Toris doesn't have bunny ears... or bunny paws... or a fluffy white bunny tail for that matter. I may be wrong though!"
"Basta!" Lovi said. This was getting on his nerves.
Ah, that clearly meant Lovino would not accept any interaction for a moment. Waiting for his older brother to calm down, little Italy looked around. What an odd mess! His previous tears had turned in a giant pond now covering the centre of the room. While his eyes wandered, his gaze fell on something he assumed the rabbit-Toris had dropped. He swiftly picked up the large fan and the white pair of kid-gloves, and since the room was rather hot (or was it the dress?) he decided to fan himself while mumbling incoherent things to himself.
He ended up singing in his boredom, not really unlike the last man sitting on the world's ground.
"Che confusione, sarà perche ti amo,
è un'emozione, che cresce piano piano,
stringimi forte, e stammi più vicino,
se ci sto bene, sarà perche ti amo..."
Before he could start the second part of the song, Feliciano realized he had put on one of the white kid-gloves. Which could only mean two things: either the gloves had considerably loosened or Feli was shrinking.
The second was most likely since he soon understood he was still shrinking. Letting go of the fan in his surprise, his height stabilized, furthermore the Italian came to the conclusion that the object in question had made him shrink and that if he hadn't stopped fanning himself he might have disappeared.
"Ne, ne, Lovi!"
"Not now, Feli, I've had enough."
"Si, ho capitto, ma ascoltarmi Lovinito!"
Romano turned around first of all to tell his brother that he was not little, no matter how big the other had grew, and secondly Feliciano only talked to him in Italian when he really wanted to be heard by the other.
Imagine how surprised he was when he discovered that indeed, Northern Italy was way shorter than him. Then suddenly, he felt he was getting shorter too.
"Feli, what the heck are you doing with that fan?!"
"Eh, making you shorter of course!" Little Italy said, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
And what if it were true? Lovino let himself being fanned, and therefore shrunk, till he was but the same size than his brother. Feliciano smile sheepishly at the other.
"Now, isn't that all better, Lovi?"
"Not, it is not!"
Feli blinked in confusion, wondering what he had done wrong this time. Soon enough he realized the door had been closed and that it was impossible for the two of them to reach the golden key, for the table was too tall, and its legs to slippery.
Both Italians went, hoping to find a solution to the present issue, when suddenly Romano slipped and took down his brother in his fall. The fall in question finished in the salty water where none of them could set foot.
"Che macello!"
"Shut up, it's your fault!"
"What?! Why?"
Feliciano felt like crying as much as Lovino wanted to punch him.
"This water is salty! We landed in your frigging sea of tears, bastard!!"
Northern Italy suddenly felt quite bad about the fact he had cried so much earlier. He was about to apologize, however something came and disturbed his current trail of thoughts.
"Mouse?"
This day felt curiouser and curiouser... no wait, that wasn't it.
Feliciano started swimming towards the strange apparition, which strangely looked like, on the one hand a giant Mouse, and on the other like Austria. Unfortunately, whatever it was, Austri-mouse was horribly fast, and having Lovino gripping tight at his dress's bow so he didn't have to swim himself didn't really help.
How much tomatoes has he been eating?! H-heavy...
"Kick, kick, kick, kick, splash, splash, splash, splash~!"
"Feliciano, the one you're splashing is me! My face is wetter than the rest of my body underwater!"
"Will you two please be quiet, attempting to ignore you properly is becoming utterly impossible!"
The Italians turned to see the very irritated Austrian anthro-mouse that had interfered in their conversation. Actually both of them were quite happy to have company in this cerebral-breaker world. However, Lovi really hoped he didn't have to talk to that person at all, he was far from liking Roderich.
"Austria, I'm so happy to see you~! Ne, ne, why do you have mouse ears? And a mouse tail? Why are you in the water too? Oh no, wait I get it! You wanted to play the piano in the sea again, ve? I'm so sorry to disappoint you but this isn't the sea, I actually cried when I was two meters tall, and it made this puddle, but- Please don't be mad, it was an accident!"
Lovino and Roderich stared in annoyance at the blabbering Feliciano, but somehow managed to wait patiently for him to stop talking. Romano did not know the reason the Austrian had kept silent, not used to not shut the other himself he however felt it was the right thing to do, somehow...
Then Feli finally marked a significant pose at the end of one sentence, the kind of pose that indicates one that he is allowed to speak. Less than a second later, Lovino watched Roderich significantly opening his mouth, which usually meant one was about to talk and the rest should listen and keep quiet. It was in actuality what it meant, nevertheless, the older Italian felt disappointed that something so normal happened. Oh, he's just talking.
"I just happened to have been caught by a flock of fishing tears. I do not recall anything essential besides that fact that might answer you questions, which are meaningless anyway."
"Eh? Fishing tears?"
"Yes, that's what I said. Humans catch fish with nets. Tears catch humans with themselves."
"R-Roderich, I'm not sure I understand..."
"It doesn't matter. Now come, I'm quite sure you would not likely appreciate drowning in your own tears."
None of the Italians were certain to understand a single word of Austria's odd speech, though this fact fairly cheered Lovino up.
Who the younger Italian brother had decided to be an "Austri-mouse" was now followed by the other nations in dresses, tears with will clinging to the fabric, blue upon blue, shining and melting.
And there, they slip those precious dears!
Crying themselves off to the ground.
Instantly forgotten, the Italians go,
Joining all others who were fished before.
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Voilà. I intend to end all chapters with a little text like this one, but I might do rimes in the next one.
I've always wondered why people seem to freak out about the American cakes. I think they're delicious, especially when the frosting is blue. But I guess that's because I'm American (Eh, I'm mostly French though...)
The song Feliciano starts singing is Sara perche ti amo by Ricchi E Poveri (I learned that song in Italian class last year. I personally think it is funnier to sing than to listen to.)
I tried respecting the story while adding a bit of my own ideas, I hope it looks nice. Also I follow the pattern of the book.
I might soon post fanart I drew for this fanfic on my deviant. I'll post the link on my profile.
Hope you enjoyed. Next chapter is already in progress.