"Dean." The angel's voice is as gravelly as always, and hard to read. But Dean is, by now, an expert in reading angel-expressions, and finding subtle nuances in their words.
Castiel is worried about something.
"What's up, Cas?"
Cas blinks, hesitant.
"I would like to know how to…court someone."
Abomination.
The word echoes through Sam's head (along with other popular hits, such as "Dean and I share a more profound bond.")
Cas thought he was an abomination. A monster- and oh the irony, a hunter turning into the kind of thing he ganked.
Cas thought he was a monster.
Cas, steady, reliable, beautiful Cas.
Cas, who he maybe-wanted, but could never have, because he could never do something like that to Dean.
Dean had gone through so much damn shit (done so much damn shit), all to keep him safe, and he deserved something good in his life for once.
Cas was that something.
Cas thought he was an abomination.
"Y'see, Cas, what the ladies love is when you act hard-to-get. I don't know what it is, but it drives 'em crazy."
"I do not wish to cause insanity, Dean."
"Not literally. Just stay with me, okay? Give 'em little hints you might be into them, and then back off. Hot and cold. Works like a charm."
"…What if the person is not…"
"Not what? Interested? Phft, Cas, man, you'll be beating them off with a stick."
"No, what if they are not female? Would the same, ah…'hot and cold' apply?"
Dean spits out his coffee.
"Cas, why are you staring at those kids? I'd really like not to be run out of town, before we gank this son of a bitch."
Cas doesn't remove his gaze from the playground across the street.
"That child is teasing that other one. Why?"
Dean shrugs. "Eh, he probably likes her. Y'know, yanking her pigtails, because he's too embarrassed to say anything."
"This is a…common practice with humans?"
Another casual shrug. "Uh, I guess, yeah. Yank her hair, call her names, steal her lunch money, anything to make her pay attention to him. Works most of the time too, even if he's only getting a smack in the face."
"Sam, of course, is an abomination."
'Wow, Cas, tell us what you really think' Sam says to himself, because it's sarcastic and maybe he wishes he can say it outloud, but he can't, because Cas thinks he's an abomination, and that hurts, it really does.
"It is not working."
"What's not working, Cas?"
"The…pigtail pulling. I fear I have only made things worse."
"Oh, that…guy. The one you have the hots for. What did you do?"
"I called him an abomination."
"Cas. That's not good."
"But you said-"
"I said at best it'll get you punched!"