Author's Notes: For Sasha (HarmonicFriction). She has now brought out my inner Dudley coddling.

Warning: Drug use, language, self-inflicted pain.

All the Kids

Chapter 1

Clarice

The life of a bully is a hard one. Not only do you have to exert tremendous amounts of strength to beat the kid, but you have to use stealth to cover your tracks.

Dudley Dursley was a master of the subtle art of bullying, or so he thought.

"B-b-but I c-can't g-get it till next week!" squealed Cam Ryan, shrinking beneath the seesaw of the park just off Magnolia Road.

Dudley raised his fist threateningly and was mere seconds away from using all the strength his large arm possessed to knock Cam to the ground. However, she walked by.

"OI! DUDLEY DURSLEY! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

Dudley's cheeks reached a new shade of red that even Ron Weasley would have been put to shame. A lump ran down his throat the size of a golf ball. "Gah, er, g-, wha-?" His fist was still held in the same intimidating demeanor, and his other was sweating profusely as it held the cuff of Cam's sweater.

Clarice annunciated as clearly and as rudely as her typically meek voice would allow. "What. The. Hell. Are. You. Do-ing?"

"Er, what?"

Clarice hit her palm to her forehead, clearly disgusted at Dudley's inferior intellect. "Cam, go home."

Cam knocked Dudley's massive fist away from his sweater and jumped to his feet, grinning madly as if he knew something the great lard of a bully didn't.

Clarice quickly closed the gap between Dudley and herself. She was not afraid to point her perfectly manicured nail right in Dudley's face. "Stay away from my brother."

Dudley mustered the most pathetic look he could garner. "But he owes me Clarice."

She cocked and eyebrow and a way that made him go weak in the knees. "What could an eleven-year-old possibly owe you?"

What did she say? Asked Dudley to himself, he had been too distracted by the angry glint in her eyes. "I like you."

The cocked eyebrow rose higher still and she stared at him as if he were some foreign object to be prodded and poked. "You didn't answer my question."

Regaining a sense of himself he realized that he couldn't let Clarice know what he had gotten her brother into. "Oh you know, some money."

She eyed him suspiciously and turned furiously letting out a yell of fury before returning to her brother.

Piers Polkiss, who until now, had remained silent, sniggered as Dudley slumped off down Magnolia Road to return to his faultless home.

"What am I doing? What the hell am I doing?" hissed Dudley to himself as he heaved his unfit body over the fence. "Oh great, just great, fuck." He had counted on Clarice's yard holding a small stone or two, not quite. He reached into his baggy pockets searching for something, anything.

He did a little jig upon discovering a small paper clip. He threw it with all his might to the window just above the kitchen.

Nothing happened. "Shit." He bent to the ground to closer examine it for the sight of a pebble.

"Oi! Dursley! Pull up your pants!"

Dudley clasped his buttocks fearfully. How had he let it become unprotected? The memory chilled him to the bone. He turned to see a stream of light shining from Clarice's window. His cheeks burned of embarrassment once again as he looked at her curvaceous silhouette form.

"What are you doing here?" scolded Clarice.

"Will you go out with me?" There he said it.

"Excuse me?"

God, why to girls have to make this so difficult? "Will you go out with me?"

"Good one mate, you can go home now and get your money from Piers," replied Clarice caustically.

"What? This wasn't a bet! I'm being serious!" He frowned up to her, but somehow wasn't angry with her, but himself.

"So you get my brother into drugs then you plan to get in my pants? Is that the way it is?"

Although he couldn't see it on her shadowed face, he knew there was a look of utmost loathing glaring back at him. "Clarice… I'm… s-sorry?"

"What? You don't know if you're sorry? Cause I know you're not. Cam knows you're not. I guess the "amazing" Smeltings isn't teaching you as much as your mum makes it out to be. Just go Dudley; I don't want to see you again."

Dudley bit his lip, holding his sensitive side in. "Bu- but, I really like you Clarice! And don't you know, all the kids are doing it now!"

"Psh, when pigs fly! You don't see me doing it do you? Now go or else I'm going to wake my mum and dad! You're lucky they where earplugs to bed! But if I were to scream, they'd be here in a instant!"

"No! Listen to me!"

"No, you listen to me Dudley Dursley! I hate you. I loathe every essence of your being! Do you know what it's like to think that your little brother may not come home one night because 'Big D' knocked him silly? Or that he may have overdosed on one of the drugs that 'Big D' makes him buy? No, you don't. You even hurt your own cousin. Even if he's a troubled case, it doesn't give you the right to take your anger out on him! Now go, or I'll scream!"

"Clarice, please!"

She took a deep breath and by the time she let out her bloodcurdling scream Dudley was already on the other side of the fence running to save his behind.