Why Aro Is Not Allowed Near The Blender

by iFellOffMars

Ten reasons why Aro cannot be near a blender.

Ten reasons why Aro Volturi is not allowed near the blender:

1. It is not used for "flesh and blood milkshakes"

2. It is not a weapon, and it is not used to bash against Caius' head.

3. Vampires do not buy human household products on ebay.

4. Vampires don't eat strawberry smoothies.

5. Bella would not like a smoothie either. Or Jacob.

6. A blender is not a lovely decorate item. Especially when you don't even have a kitchen.

7. They will never be a vampire's best friend.

8. It's not a fashionable clothing item either. And Sulpicia will not wear it for you. Neither will Marcus.

9. It's not a musical instrument, and you will not form a band with Jane and Alec and call yourselves "The Kitchen Musicians"

10. You can not have a "Bella Swan" smoothie for breakfast.