This story is a spin-off from the tv show Em Familia.
Chapter 1 "Broken Trust"
"Go… But i don't want to see you leave anymore. I won't look back. I can't handle seeing you walk away anymore".
For over a week those words kept spinning around in Clara's head. Each time she closed her eyes Marina's image popped up, her face full of pain. Her eyes full of sadness as those words forming her trembling lips. Clara watched her holding back the tears, which were boiling in her eyes. She never felt more guilty.. And more weak… Weak because she shared the same feelings as Marina, but she didn't have the guts to live what she was feeling. And yet again she hurt Marina by leaving. But this time something had snapped in Marina, she could tell. Something changed between the two of them, and she was afraid that she could never fix it again.
As she secretly watched Marina, she noticed the lack of brightness in Marina's beautiful brown eyes. Her body seemed tired and she walked around the studio on auto pilot. And she was to blame… Clara tried to stay away from the studio as much as possible, to avoid hurting Marina more than she already had. And to avoid her own aching pain… The thought to stay away completely crossed her mind several times, but she couldn't bear to be separated from Marina.
She didn't notice Flavinha had joined her on the couch. "Are you oke, Clara?" she whispered, while her eyes searched for Marina. Clara followed her gaze and saw Marina facing them backwards at the other side of the studio. She felt tears welling up when Flavinha took her hand for a moment, and smiled at her understanding. Clara's voiced cracked while she whispered "i can't do this anymore.. It hurts so much.. And worse, it hurts Marina aswell…" Falvinha's eyes were pointed towards the floor and she nodded slowly. A fresh tear streamed down Clara's face, while she felt Flavinha's eyes on her. She seemed to doubt what to say as she took a deep breath. "Clara… If it hurts so much.. Why don't you do anything about it?" Clara faced Flavinha, but before she could answer she froze when she heard Marina's voice. "Flavinha, could you help me for a minute?" She kept facing the ground, while Flavinha softly touched her leg and walked towards Marina.
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Clara finally gathered the strength to face Marina. "Marina, could i leave early today?" Clara tried to ignore the heavy, constraining pain in her chest. She didn't know where to put her hands, so she was slightly picking at her own shirt. She tried to search eye contact, but Marina didn't face her. "I have to pick up Ivan at school" Their eyes finally met for a second, and Clara felt the clutch in het stomach tighten. Marina's distant eyes were looking at her, in a way that scared her. Like she ment nothing to her. "Ofcourse.." she replied "anytime for Ivan". "Thanks", Clara whispered. She tried to walk away, but her body couldn't move. It hit her how much she missed the "old" Marina. The woman who always welcomed her with a hug and with the brightest smile in the world. The woman who enlightened every single day since they met. The woman who could let her shiver just by looking at her and the woman who would move heaven and earth for her. "Is there something else?" asked Marina without looking at her. "No", Clara replied and slowly turned around towards the door, with her eyes tearing up again.
Marina watched Clara walk away, and it felt like her heart was breaking all over again. Like it did so many times during the last week. She felt devastated by the way she was treating Clara. So cold, as if they weren't even friends. But she felt like there was no other way, she didn't want to break in front of her. She tried to avoid any eye contact, because she feared Clara could see right threw her. And she feared what she would find in Clara's brown eyes. Every vibe in her body wanted to run after her, and hold her in her arms. To apologize for her behavior, but she couldn't. She had to keep her distance, and it killed her… She knew she couldn't handle another day like this, so she made a decision, and texted Vanessa.
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Marina is on her way to Londen for a shoot, she left this morning with Vanessa. Clara felt the ground disappear under her feet and her heart skipped a few beats. It was like she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Why didn't Marina told her she was leaving? Ofcourse she didn't tell her, it was none of her business anymore. Was it ever her business? But this new reality hit her, and it hit her hard. It felt like she took a punch in her stomach. Her body started to shake uncontrollable, and tears came streaming down her face. "Ooh Clara.." said Gisele before she held her in her arms.
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Marina stared at Vanessa while she was sleeping next to her. Her head rested on Marina's shoulder and a smile spread her lips. She had made the right decision by accepting the shoot in Londen. Vanessa somehow managed to take her mind of Clara for a while. The shoot turned out to be amazing and she regained some energy, which she completely lost during the last weeks. And she couldn't deny the fact that she loved Vanessa's presence. They hadn't fight for a change, although she could slap her face when she mentioned Clara. Especially when she talked trash about her. She knew Vanessa was trying to cheer her up, and although Clara hurt her like hell, she still loved her. With every vibe in her body. But she lost all hope of them ever being together. Clara's actions were so much more of an answer for Marina, than any words could ever be. She had left her too many times, that she couldn't imagine a future where Clara stayed at her side. She swallowed when the pilot let them know they were about to land in Rio.