Disclaimer: If I owned it, I'd own the DVDs. Unfortunately…sniff

Yaoi….so, ahem….

"Ah, great, I just got accepted and I'm already in trouble…" Ed muttered as he followed Havoc through the labyrinth of hallways to Lieutenant Colonel what's-his-face's office.

"Oh, Ed, I'm sure you're not in trouble. The Lieutenant Colonel just said he wanted to see you," Havoc said, smiling around the ever-present cigarette in his mouth and turning to look at Ed.

"Whatever…"

They walked in silence for a little while longer, and then: "Well, here we are!" Havoc said cheerfully. "I'll wait for you at the main entrance." And he was gone.

Ed stood motionlessly facing the door for a few minutes, mentally bracing himself for Mustang's inevitable condescension. Finally, taking a big breath, he entered the office.

Roy Mustang was sitting behind an absolute mountain of papers, under which, Ed supposed, there might be a desk. He barely looked up from his work when Ed entered. 'Even though,' thought Ed venomously, 'he's the one who wants to see me.'

"Finally. I was thinking I'd have to wait all night. Sit, FullMetal," Roy said, putting down his pen and gesturing to one of the black couches he shared an office with. Ed plopped unceremoniously down, not taking his eyes off the Lieutenant Colonel.

Roy watched him, resting his chin on long, intertwined fingers. He was having second thoughts about this plan of his, but in true Roy Mustang fashion, he ignored them.

"So are you gonna tell me what I did or not?" asked Ed, currently draped across the couch, with an uneasy sideways glance in Mustang's direction.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm in trouble, right? Why else—" Ed was cut off by Mustang's almost melodical laugh.

"Trouble?" Roy's eyebrows raised. "Now why would you think that, FullMetal?"

Ed's eyes widened at Mustang's smirk. "W-what? But—"

"I simply—" Roy stood up—"wanted to know—" he walked out from behind the paper mountain—"if you had—" he got closer to Ed—"any questions—" and sat next to Ed, facing him. "Now that you're a dog of the military and all."

"N-not really, no…" Ed was visibly nervous with the Lieutenant Colonel so close to him.

"Then I have some questions for you, if don't mind, FullMetal." Roy smirked—wait. Smirked? What the hell kind of questions could he possibly—

"Um, o-okay," stuttered the…ahem…vertically challenged (coughcoughshort) alchemist.

"How do you like it so far? I know you haven't had much time, but still…" Mustang looked sincere enough, but Ed was still a bit unsettled for…whatever reason.

"It's…I get the feeling I'm gonna be on a pretty short leash from now on." Ed lowered his eyes, looking a bit depressed.

"Well, get used to it, FullMetal. We all had to go through it. What do you think of everyone you've met so far?" The Lieutenant Colonel's countenance betrayed nothing of his plan.

"They're all…nice. I mean, I guess…" Ed's eyes didn't leave the floor.

"What about me? What do you think of me, Ed?" Ed's eyes snapped up, only to find Mustang drawing nearer.

He tried to move…really, he did! But it seemed to Ed he was paralyzed. Or transfixed. His eyes widened as he felt a gloved hand on the back of his neck. Mmm…a warm hand…focus!

And focus he did. Just in time to see Roy's eyes shut as he closed the distance between their lips.

'Well...he isn't completely freaking out, like he might have…mmm…' Roy leaned closer to Ed.

Ah yes, Ed.

Ed, who was frozen in shock.

That is, until he felt the Flame Alchemist's well-practiced tongue run across his bottom lip. Reflexively, he opened his mouth, gasping slightly at the unusual sensation. Not to say, however…that he didn't like it.

Roy smirked, gladly taking the unintentional invitation. He ran his tongue across the roof of Ed's mouth, eliciting an almost violent shiver from the boy. It was plain to see that Ed was enjoying this. Mustang could tell from his vast experience with other men. Namely Maes.

He was feeling lightheaded just from kissing the boy. Or was it something else? 'Oh, yes, that's right. Humans need oxygen, don't they?' Reluctantly, he broke away. Not too far, but far enough to see the look on Ed's face. The blonde's eyes were half-closed and clouded with pleasure, and there was a heavy blush on his face. He was also panting, albeit slightly. 'Cute,' Roy thought, smirking.

"So, FullMetal," he asked, gently tilting Ed's chin up, "what do you think of me?" Mustang's onyx eyes glittered playfully.

"You're okay," breathed the young alchemist.

Roy looked at his clock, eyes widening in feigned surprise. "My, how time flies when one's having fun! Looks like it's time for you to go, Ed. Poor Havoc's probably getting worried down there, don't you think?" he stood up and offered Ed his hand.

Ed took it, and Mustang walked him to the door. He waited till the boy was halfway out to say, "Oh, yes, and FullMetal?" Said alchemist turned. Roy slowly kissed him once more and whispered, "Congratulations on passing the exam." He shut the door quietly, leaving Ed no choice but to stumble down to where Havoc was waiting for him.

"So what happened? You took forever, you know," inquired the man.

"Um…nothing, really."

—Elsewhere—

Maes Hughes was absolutely tearing his house apart. "Honey, do you know where I put my video camera? Because I coulda sworn I took it outta Mustang's office…"

RoyEdRoyEdRoyEdRoyEdRoyEdRoyEdRoyEdRoyEd

Maes found it, alright. Yes, it was in Mustang's office. Yes, it had been on. And yes, the Lieutenant Colonel was greeted the next morning by a cheering, catcalling crowd.

Gah! OOCness!!

Ummm…I'm not sure if Colonel Bastard-chan was still L.C. when Ed got accepted or if he had already been promoted to Colonel, sooo…yeah. Oh, before I forget (I do that a lot), when I say 'draped across the couch', I don't mean like a blanket or something. Heheh. An Ed blanket. Sorry. Anyway, you know how he has his arms kinda on the back part and one foot on the other knee? Yeah, like that…sorry, I'm bubbling.

Thou shalt leaveth le worshipped reviews if thou wishest. (Please review)

Again, I'm really bad at finding my own errors, so yell at me if you find any.