This is a parody of the movie version of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. I do not own these characters or situations, they are owned and created by J.K. Rowling. I have borrowed bits of dialogue and situations from other sources out of this website.

An introduction...

Mysterious music plays...Harry Potter is under his bed sheet moving around...a lot.

"Lumos ianua! Lumos ianua!" Harry started screaming. "Hold on a second, I'm not supposed to do magic outside school! Oh well, I'm Harry Potter and I get away with everything!" Mysterious music continues to play!

Chapter 1

"Harry, your aunt Marge is coming over, be normal!" Uncle Vernon said.

"Sign my Hogwarts note, which allows me to wander off and be bad when I'm out of school!" Harry said annoyingly.

"Wander off...get lost...die...hmmm...only if you're good! Look its Aunt Marge!" Uncle Vernon said, helping his fat sister with her things.

Everyone sat at the table to eat, except Harry of course, who served them, like the slave he is.

"Worthless slave, your aunt and uncle are so good to you for letting you stay here with them blah blah blah blah, I'm going to insult your parents: Harry your mother is evil and so are you" Aunt Marge said, annoyingly.

"Don't you dare say that about my mother...she was...she was...well I don't really know!" Harry said angrily. Everyone laughed at Harry. "I need to create a diversion so I can sneak out of this house! I have an idea! I'll blow up Aunt Marge!" Harry whispered to himself, "Oh my God, talking to myself, I am crazy!"

Harry blew up his aunt. "Damn! I'm so scared! I might get expelled for using magic!"

Dudley looked out at his aunt flying in the air...then got distracted by the TV.

"Make your Aunt less fat, Harry!" Uncle Vernon said, screaming at Harry.

"No!" Harry yelled. The front door just happened to be open, but before Harry jumped out, he threatened Uncle Vernon with his piece of wood!

Harry ran around and saw some eyes in the bush. "Eyes of human! Just what I need for my love potion! Wait is that a human?" But the Knight Bus suddenly came and distracted Harry, "Wow! Purple! So magical!"

"Welcome to the Knight Bus! Hope on!" some ugly guy with a cockney accent said.

"A lift with a stranger? SURE!" Harry said smiling.

"Hey! What the hell are shrunken heads doing in here?" Harry asked.

"Them people didn't have any money on them when we picked them up! They tried to cheat the system!" the stewardess—I mean, male bus attendant said.

Harry gulped and shoved 993849854958 Galleons into his hands.

"Hey this bus is super fast! And the heads are talking! Oh my gosh...we are going to hit into that bus...argh! My brain and head is feels like they're being squashed!" Harry says, screaming.

"Don't worry, it only destroys 60 of your brain cells the first time it happens...later on, you get too dumb to feel the pain", said the bus attendant.

"Just take me to Tom the innkeeper!" Harry said, collapsing to the floor.