Title: There is Always Hope

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: Sexual content, violence, maybe some swearing you know the normal things. Should something come up that I think could be sensitive to some of you I'll give you a heads up!

Spoilers: This story is going to run from the end of season 2 till the end of season 5 so just a heads up guys!

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the supernatural characters in this story! The only ones I own are Amy and some of the other ones you'll see in this story later on!

A/N: YES! Hey everyone were back! K I know this is earlier than I told you to expect but I'm in a super good mood, mainly because I wasn't picked to be a jury member that was quite a relief! X) So I was in such a good mood that I uploaded this story ahead of schedule!

So anyways as you all know this story takes place after "Thing's Aren't Always as they Seem." Like I said it is a rated M story obviously so if you don't like these kinds of stories please leave X) I hope I can pull this off for all of you and I hope you enjoy it guys!

Oh and since this story bounces offf the other one for those of you that do not understand what is going on please go back and read the other story. But I think you guys can catch on eventually. X)

As Amy turned around, she saw a sleek black cat sitting there on her windowsill precariously perched outside. Amy raised an eyebrow at it and started to walk towards the little animal. The black cat sat calmly and observed Amy as she came nearer and nearer to itself.

Suddenly, as soon as Amy reached the window the cat jumped down and ran down the fire escape. It stopped about a level down and stared up at Amy as if asking, "You gonna come and get me?"

Amy huffed and shook her head, "Weird cat."

Closing the window, she walked over to her couch and grabbed the remote. Turning on the TV the news report came on for the day. Amy sighed as she sat back and watched the news report. Apparently, a bad accident on one of the major highways had caused a huge pileup for getting into the city and the line could take an hour or so to get through. A mother had killed her two children and claimed that she suffered from post partum. Also a man that had apparently cheated people out of a lot of money for insurance died today from a sack of money that came out of no where and smacked the man in the head allowing him to fall backwards and smack his head on the concrete killing him instantly.

Amy raised her eyebrows at the irony of this situation, "Wow that's just strange, killed by money when you cheated people out of thousands of dollars."

Amy rolled her eyes and was about to change the channel when it cut to a commercial break and a cosmetics add came on. Amy's eyes widened as she recognized the person on the TV staring back at her seductively. It was none other than Missy Preston. Yeah, she had learned her last name before she left college just to be on the safe side.

Missy had been one of the biggest pains in her butt for the short amount of time that she had attended Crawford Hall. A natural bully and a person that lived off spite, bitterness, jealousy, and the attention she got from her atrocious acts Amy had to admit that Missy was one of the lowest people she ever had the misfortune to run across. She bullied Amy mercilessly ever since she first saw her and Amy just took it, even standing up for her once no less! It made Amy roll her eyes and sigh at herself angrily sometimes even today still.

It turned out that shortly after Amy had left Crawford Hall Missy had been "discovered" or so she heard through the grape vine. Apparently, Missy went to try out for a part in one of the plays at the college and a secret talent scout was sitting far in the back where they wouldn't have been seen. Supposedly, he had taken an instant shine to her and immediately promoted Missy as his new face for his cosmetics line.

Amy had snorted when she heard this story. More or less, it was most likely her dad or someone that Missy knew that bought her the part. Things didn't happen like that just by chance there's usually some kind of outside help.

Now Amy stared in disgust as Missy's face filled the screen. Her long platinum blonde hair was done up in large curls that waved around her face in a sexy fashion. Her cold blue/grey eyes sparkled out at the camera at whoever watched as her delicate eyebrows arched in a come here hither motion. Slowly she licked her lips seductively and her straight teeth flashed out between her full pink lips.

"Heavenly Cosmetics," said the spokesperson on the screen, "every angel deserves their share at fame, and you can be one too. Buy the lipstick from the "Heavenly Collection" and become instantly envied by all your rivals and peers."

Amy snorted in disgust as she rolled her eyes and turned off the TV. Throwing the controller beside her Amy stared up at the ceiling. The ceiling fan rotated slowly and lazily above her and she became caught in its hypnotic revolution. Turning her head to the side, she looked out the window at the fluffy white clouds lazily floating by. Everything was ok with the world, or so it seemed, everything was ok except her.

Shortly after Lance and Jazz had left and Gabe had been murdered right in front of her eyes, Amy had left Crawford Hall and had never looked back. For her the memories of the school and everything that had happened in it were too much for her mind, body, and soul to bear.

She could still remember everything clearly, as if it were yesterday. She still remembered meeting Gabe for the very first time under that large, tall tree. His honey colored eyes tinged with green had stared down at her as laughter and concern danced within them. If Amy had known then what she knew now maybe everything would have happened differently. Maybe she wouldn't have spent so much time on constantly doubting Gabe and his actions or his supposed "job", but she had let her conflicting emotions get in the way of herself and her relationship with Gabe. He had always stuck up for her even if he went to extreme lengths…

Amy sighed, 'Is that what it's like having a guardian angel around you constantly protecting you?' she thought to herself tiredly.

Every time someone threatened her in some way or hurt her Gabe was always there to get them back tenfold; and boy did he get them back. Some lengths were very severe while others were…minor.

Amy snorted at herself as this thought ran through her mind. Wow how the tables had turned. One day not so long ago she would never have thought of murder and deadly pranks as a small matter and now it was as if her whole perspective or good and bad, right and wrong had changed in a matter of seconds.

Her thoughts drifted off to Jazz. Amy couldn't help a small smile start to stretch her face as she thought of her tiny little friend. Jazz had been the shoulder that she could cry on whenever she had needed to. She was small with short black hair, delicate rounded features, and an enormous amount of energy that could rival any kid in the world. Amy figured that it might also have something to do with what Jazz was in actuality.

Jazz was a Light Elf. She was one of the good ones unlike the Dark Elves.

'Or maybe I'm just stereotyping them like other people do in mainstream media like gays, blacks, Mexicans, old, young,' Amy thought to herself contemplatively.

She didn't find out about her best friend until very late on into her first year at Crawford Hall. Her friend had used a type of glamour spell and had enchanted her appearance so that she wouldn't be noticed by the general population and cause an uproar. When she wasn't in her glamour Jazz was tall and elegant. Her facial features took on a more cat like quality and even her voice became softer and more gentle.

Jazz had always made Amy feel safe even before she knew what she was. She was the first person that she told about her parents. Heck she never even told Gabe about them. And she guessed she would never get the chance now.

Amy shook her head and thought of her next friend Lance. He was incredibly handsome. Tall, blonde, and extremely good-looking Lance was like the god of their college. He was admired by all the woman and all the guys envied and looked to him. He was a regular poster boy but when it came to her and Jazz he was such a sweet kitten.

Lance had turned out that he was a warlock that was like 700 years old. Yeah if that didn't bother you then the fact that he didn't look a day older than 20, no wrinkles, perfect white teeth, fluffy blonde hair always perfectly styled, and a gorgeous body that could kill just by looking at it then you should be jealous by now.

He had never really used his powers in front of her but she knew that he wouldn't lie about something like that. Lance was one of her friends that had left shortly after Gabe had died along with Jazz. She had never seen both of her friends again after that day it was as if they had dropped off the face of the Earth.

She had grabbed the paper the day after about Gabe's death. After reading through it once she had refused to look at it again and had kept, it locked in a chest under her bed. She refused to open it again until she was ready to face everything that it held inside of it. The last thing that would join everything in there already was the diary sitting innocently still on her small desk by the window.

The sun was shining on its red leather binding making it appear to glow. Amy sighed tiredly as she gazed at the innocent book. It had been extremely painful for her to go back and recount all of those events in painful detail. It had been almost a year since she had left Crawford Hall and still everything was painful.

Turning away from the book, Amy bit the tip of her nail. Sighing angrily she got up and walked towards her small desk with the diary lying on top of it. Just as she reached out to grab the notebook, her phone rang.

Jumping slightly Amy turned and glared at the phone accusingly for disturbing her as if it was its fault. Looking at the diary again, she reached out one more time to grab it when the phone disturbed her. Amy gritted her teeth and counted to five hoping that the phone would turn off.

Unfortunately, for her it kept on ringing. Sighing angrily Amy walked over to the phone.

"Hello?" she said into the phone trying to keep her aggravation at bay.

"Hey Amy sorry to bother you but can you come in a little bit earlier today?" asked the voice on the end who Amy instantly recognized as Sasha.

"Yeah sure when do you need me in?" asked Amy wearily hiding the sigh that she wanted to utter into the phone.

"Within the hour please," said Sasha on the other end, "I'll pay you double!"

Amy smiled at her boss's frantic voice on the other end of the phone. It sounded like a real jamboree over there. She could hear loud customers talking and shouting from the kitchen in the back calling up orders.

"Thanks Sasha I'll be there as soon as I can," said Amy as she hung up.

Sighing Amy knocked her forehead against the wall beside the phone emitting a light thump and a groan of dissatisfaction. She ran her fingers through her hair and turned around. The first thing her gaze was drawn to was the diary still sitting exactly where she had left it when she had went to pick up the phone.

Walking over Amy walked past the diary and into the bathroom. Stripping out of her clothes Amy walked into the shower and turned the water up until it was scalding. She no longer flinched, as the overly hot water that scalded her flesh, the only time she did wince was when the trails of water ran down her wrists.

It wasn't known by anyone except for Amy but shortly after she had left college she had started to cut herself. The anger, pain, and despair had finally over run her and got the best of her. Without anyone to help her or let her lean on she had succumbed to her dark desires of cutting in order to alleviate some of the pain that she still felt in her heart and soul.

While the pain of the cutting took away some of the pain that she experienced within a few minutes it would be back with a vengeance that would sometimes leave her breathless. Those were the times were Amy would go and sit in the shower and turn the shower on and let it blast her with its freezing cold waves.

Raising one of her wrists Amy looked upon the angry raised flesh. She no longer looked down on it in fear or resentment, now it was just apart of her as much as her arms or legs were. Amy sighed as she gazed at them and then turned off the showerhead.

Small droplets still rained on her for a few more seconds, then a steady drip, and then soon nothing but silence permeated the apartment again. Throwing the shower curtain open Amy stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. She tied it around her body then grabbed a slightly smaller one and dried out her long blonde locks.

Opening the bathroom door, she walked across to her bedroom and opened the door. It was modest. It wasn't as if Amy could afford anything luxurious on her small budget but it got her by and she was content as she would ever be.

Stepping around her small bed, she opened her closet. Gazing inside she grabbed her work uniform from the meager selection of her clothes. Tossing it onto the bed Amy stripped out of the towels and began to dress in them.

It was a plain black shirt that didn't show off anything, a small black skirt and some flats completed the look. Amy grabbed a ponytail and tied her long blonde hair back into a high pony. She gazed at her reflection in the mirror. She looked as if she hadn't slept in days and that wasn't too far off from the actual truth.

Her dreams were haunted by constant nightmares and even her waking mind was plagued by dark thoughts. Amy couldn't seem to find any peace in her life anymore. She worked long and grueling hours to make sure she had a roof over her head and there were times where she almost thought that she wouldn't make it to the rent but she always seemed to scrape by although barely at times. Slowly but surely Amy was wasting away.

Walking out towards her small living/kitchen room Amy gazed around. The diary hadn't left. She sighed angrily as she realized that she hadn't put it away like she had originally planned on doing.

Looking to the small clock mounted on the desk Amy realized that she had taken longer than she had originally planed and quickly started to walk towards the door. Grabbing a long coat she threw it over her body as she gazed back.

Pointing an accusing finger at the diary she muttered, "As soon as I get back I'm gonna deal with you."

Amy opened the door and walked out. Closing the door behind her, she locked it and sprinted off to get to her job.

A/N: So? First chapter guys just easing into it XD I already have chapter 2 pretty much done and chapter 3 I'm starting on shortly so don't expect an update till maybe Saturday or so! Thanks all of ya!