I wasn't the same person anymore after we'd returned to the school. The old Louis who would never shut up, who would always find a way to make everyone around him feel better and never failed to remind how much the people around him meant to him.. he was dead. Lost, and gone forever. I could feel everyone looking at me, feeling bad and lost because of what happened to me, sad because of the change in me. I couldn't guess what they were thinking, though, and honestly, I didn't care. I'd been so relieved and happy to see Clementine when she'd arrived to get me and the others back. I'd hugged her and cried in her arms while Aasim had told her what had happened. She'd been shocked, and I'd just.. silently smiled at her, despite being scared and hurting. My feelings for her hadn't changed one bit.
But now that we'd all made it back home and I was in the safe environment once more, I just wanted to disappear. And I ran, I just ran as fast as I could to the dorms, through the corridor and into my room, slamming the door shut behind me and then just collapsing on the floor in one of the corners.. like I'd been when Clem had found me. I sat there, hugging myself, shaking and crying for everything I'd been through.. everything I'd lost. The pain, the sadness.. everything I'd been through flushed over me in one big wave that would drown me. I closed my eyes tightly as if to hide from everything.

I didn't know how long I'd been sitting there until I heard a faint knock on the door. I lifted my head just a little when the door opened, and Clementine stepped in. I saw her expression change from a little concerned to worried as she saw how I looked. I'd cried so much that my eyes were red, and the endless tears had stained my cheeks and mixed in with the blood around my mouth. I was a shaking mess, nothing else. Yet still Clementine walked to me, I could briefly see her holding a water bottle before she knelt down next to me. I wasn't going to drive her away, I didn't have the strength.. and I needed someone even though I couldn't say it.
"Oh, Louis.."
Clementine said with sorrowful eyes, interrupting my thoughts. I had just been thinking about the things I'd enjoyed before.. the things that had helped me through harder times and made me feel better.. Like playing the piano, more than anything. Before Clem came in, I'd made a heartbreaking decision. I was never going to play the piano again. No matter how much I'd loved it, that part of me was dead now. I couldn't think that playing might actually help me move on. But no, I just wouldn't be able to do it anymore, even though I had two working hands. I didn't know it yet, but Clementine had been talking about it with others, out on the yard. About finding some ways to help me. And Violet had brought up the piano, saying how I had sometimes used it to piss her off, playing and singing super loudly on purpose when she'd been close.
"That piano, as much as he used it to drive me crazy, is such a big part of him. Can you talk with Louis, Clementine?"
she'd asked.
"Maybe, I don't know, try to get him to play it again. See if it would help?"

And now Clem was here, sitting down next to me. I didn't keep much of an eye contact with her, if at all. I just kept looking down with sad eyes.
"Here, Louis.."
she suddenly said, opened the water bottle and carefully tilted it a little to dampen a part of her sleeve, lacking a proper rag, and really gently and carefully cleaned the around of my mouth. She took her time and was really caring because she knew just how hurt I was.
"There.. that's a little better,"
she then said and gave me a small, reassuring smile. She then let me lean against her shoulder.
"Louis.."
she said after a very short silence, knowing that this might not be easy for me.
"Please, listen to what I have to say, alright?"
I only nodded, so Clementine took a deep breath to give herself more courage, and then just decided to bring up the plan.
"Louis, I talked with the others before I came here, and Vi suggested that maybe you should try playing the piano again. She said how it always used to make you feel better, and also how you used it to drive her crazy."
I turned a little pale, hearing about the plan. There was no way for me to do this..
"Can you try, Louis? At least a little? Just to press some random keys, if nothing else. And I've.. missed hearing you play,"
Clementine then said to end her speech. I already slowly shook my head, so caught in my fears. But Clem knew it, and she also knew that I shouldn't be allowed to keep going like this, because I would just destroy myself completely.
"I promise to you, nothing will hurt you here,"
she then said, pressing a gentle kiss on my cheek. And I didn't know how, but pretty soon I stood up with him. Some part of me was still voicelessly screaming how this was a bad idea, and I thought I agreed with it, but I also didn't want to let Clementine down. I never did. That alone was why I followed her outside. On the way to the admin building I briefly saw Violet look in our direction and giving an approving nod to Clementine. She nodded back and held my hand for every step of the way.

As we stepped into the building, it seemed and felt the same like it had done the last time I was there. The piano room entrance was just next to the front door, and Clementine carefully led me in. I then took a few deep breaths standing by the door before I walked with her into the room. Clementine encouraged me to sit on the bench and soon she joined me, sitting right next to me, which I was glad and relieved about. After a moment of total silence I pressed a couple of the keys just to try it out. Clementine smiled next to me.
"Louis.."
she then decided to say.
"Can you.. try playing a song? Any song?"
I turned to look at her, slightly tilting my head. I was seriously thinking about it. And after a moment of hesitation I put my hands on the keys, taking one last deep breath and started playing. Clementine recognised the song soon, it was "Little Do You Know" by Alex & Sierra. We had used to sing it together every now and then. But now it wouldn't be the case anymore. Still, I kept playing and soon I heard Clementine start singing the song just like nothing had changed.

"Little do you know
How I'm breaking while you fall asleep
Little do you know
I'm still haunted by the memories"

She sang and I kept playing while she continued the song. Her voice really was beautiful, I hadn't heard many like it before. Eventually the song reached the first chorus, where I would've taken over and started singing. But now the only sound I could produce was the one of silence. I looked at Clem and seemed a little scared, so soon she made the choice and continued singing for me. I didn't realize it at the time because I was so caught up by my feelings, but I smiled at her. Then she kept singing and leading us throughout the song while I took care of the music. The beautiful sounds of both the piano and Clementine filled the entire room.. Just like our voices had used to do before. We had sounded really good together. But now, all I could do was make sure the piano sounded better than it had ever done before.
The song advanced and Clementine's voice echoed in my ears like the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard. Eventually we got to the final chorus, which was where we would've been singing together. And the harmony our voices had produced.. it was really special, no words could make it enough justice. I closed my eyes and let my fingers traverse on the piano keys as Clementine sang for both of us.

"Oh wait, just wait
I love you like I've never felt the pain
Just wait
I love you like I've never been afraid
Just wait
Our love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me"

I listened to her give her all to the song, and let it take me away completely. That was when the tears started running down my cheeks once more. This time I cried not only for everything I'd lost and could never get back, but also for the chance of maybe somehow moving on despite everything that I'd been through. For the first time I felt like maybe there was still some hope for me, too, and that I wasn't alone. As I guided the song close to the end, I smiled between the tears. Clementine had put her arm around me as she sang the last words of the song, which I normally would have done. But I still sang them in my mind.

"'Cause little do you know
I, I love you 'til the sun dies"