Jimmy just got back from town with a carton of Newports to distribute illegally to the neighborhood. He heard everyone losing their fucking shit inside a house. When he peered into Eddy's window, the caterwaul was traced to everyone realizing that 90's Midwest emo/math rock band American Football had reunited. However, he could barely see it from all the smoke emitting from the multiple joints that were lit in celebration. He walked inside and was immediately rendered catabolic from the absurd amount of kush being blazed in the room. He lethargically had the strength to ask one question.
"Damn cuz, how many dicks did Kinsella have to suck to make that happen?"
"It's the emo revival, you inane cunt.", Edd shot back, "ain't you heard of Dads and The World is a Beautiful Place and shit like that?"
Jimmy replied with a swift no, now vertiginous as a stroke victim, ungainly stumbling throughout the hallway.
"Yo cuz, I'm so glad I started growing this instead of vegetables and shit.", Rolf replied before taking another hit from the joint. "Who got the Domino's menu?" He said as Kevin vociferously cackled. They ordered a massive pizza, topped with pineapples, sausage, barbecue chicken, and really whatever else could fit on that disgusting portmanteau of dogshit. After this, they returned to the original subject matter.
"Yo...yo Kevin", Eddy said, "let's cash in on this shit. We'll start a Midwest emo band. We can't be exactly like the rest, so we'll do some skramz vocals or some shit. Send a demo to Topshelf, put out a split with Braid and The Defend Pop Punk group jerks off over it. We'll have so much fucking money, and bitches and weed."
"Yeah", Kevin said. He then noticed Jimmy passed out on the floor, with his initially pallid face now turning blue.
"Fuckin lightweight", Nazz remarked.
"But yo man lets do that shit", Ed said, "We'll play all our songs in weird ass tunings and it'll be fun as shit."
"Let's do it."
They then all took a simultaneously hit of the blunt before passing out.
To be continued