You can stop
Bossing me about
Making sure I eat my fill
And yours
Your stomach growling in the night
Eyelids dropping as you wait until I fall to sleep
You can stop
Pretending to be my dad
When he's away from home
Telling me that everything is okay
Using all of Dad's sayings and words
I always preferred you as my big brother anyway
You can stop
Fighting off the bullies at school
Who tease me for always being the new kid
Another day in front of the teacher's desk
As I wait around the school gate
For your bruised, smiling face to appear again.
You can stop
Defending me to Dad
I can fight my own corner now
I can make my own decisions
Even if your hurt eyes
Defy what your mouth is saying.
You can stop
Jumping in front of the bullet for me
Do you not realise?
Every time you smile, lie and DIE for me
I feel all the more lost
Where did my big brother go?
Now here you are facing me.
Blood dripping.
A look on your face that I don't recognise.
I search desperately for you.
I hurt with you
Every part and memory of you
You can stop, Dean
You can stop.