After completing her pre-flight checklist for the fourth time, Rey meanders over to the lower level to double check the storage. The box of Kyber crystals rests waiting where she and Ben had hidden it last night. Thank the Force, Hux still had no idea about Ben's duplicity.
Rey huffs and sits at the table where the Sabacc cards are still strewn. Her mind drifts toward everything that has happened since the Battle of Crait.
The war had been hard on everyone, but through their bond she had seen firsthand the toll it took on Ben. Unable to trust his own thoughts as the whispers of Snoke still echoed in his head. Some old whispers, some new ones, borne of his nightmares. Even in his death, that bastard made life a living hell for Ben Solo.
With the help of their bond, though, Rey had helped Ben sort out reality from the ghost of his Master.
And they had grown… close in the process.
She's sure her friends would say too close, except nobody knows the identity of the mysterious double-agent form the First Order. One day, Rey had just started passing intel, and slowly the Resistance had been able to mount their attack. Not full on, but they began poking at the seams of the previously unstoppable war machine. Covert operations slowly broke down the chain of command. Previously untouchable radio frequencies delivered incorrect coordinates to First Order ships. One by one, the ships slipped into Resistance traps.
Then, Ben had requested to meet her in person, saying he had something, or someone, that needed protection.
They met on a busy planet. It was a neutral merchant planet; jewels, food, books, and other random stores and warehouses filled the place. When she saw Ben, her heart had stuttered. And then it stopped completely when she saw his hand resting protectively on a young boy's shoulder. A Force sensitive for her to protect and train.
That was the first time she hugged him. He seemed bewildered, but had wrapped his arms around her nevertheless. She was shocked by how right it felt. And by how much she didn't want to let go.
That evening, after securing the force-sensitive boy in her ship with Dejarik to keep him occupied, they had gone to a cantina. For the first time, she danced in Ben's arms. Then, as the sun was barely stretching its rays across the horizon, he kissed her before he departed.
The next time, they had to hide out together overnight, as Wanted: Undesirable No. 1 signs had popped up with her face on them.
They huddled up in her ship. After playing, and losing to, him at Sabacc, he had looked at her with those brown eyes that she had fallen into so many times before. This time, they had drawn something out. Without thinking, she asked him a simple question. One that had been chipping up from her subconscious ever since his change had started; Why?
In response, he had kissed her. And opened his mind. And she felt, for a brief moment, how much he cared about her. It was an area of his mind that he had never before let her see. And well, she reacted very strongly as her own feelings bubbled up. Instead of saying them, she acted on them and… things… happened.
They both decided to stay another day and night, seeking a reprieve from the war around them. Which brought her to this morning. Where Ben was still sleeping, even though she had other activities in mind...
Rey's stomach growls at her, jolting her from her musings.
Too hungry and impatient to wait for Ben to wake up on his own, Rey opens the door to the small bedroom and bounds onto the bed, which jostles him into a half-awake mumbling fit.
"Mmph.. No.. Just another couple… hours… of sleep." The corners of his lips quirk up when he sees her. But then he turns over, and closes his eyes again.
She leans in and plants a loud and wet kiss on his cheek. At that, Ben blearily opens his eyes and protests, "So loud, Rey.. Mmph.. Whyy?"
Rey then tugs one of his hands from under the blanket and tries to pull his dead weight out of bed. "Come on, Ben! Foooood!"
In response, he reaches his arms out, one on her left hip, the other on her right shoulder, and pulls her down so her back is against his chest. He snakes his arms further around her, crossing them in front of her chest and hooking his hands behind her knees. The crisscrossed arm cage makes the perfect pillow for her head and she sighs happily, sinking into his warmth.
He has her wrapped up in a ball, and those arms encircle her so completely.
But the side of her shirt is now pushed up, and the draft of the room on that little bit of skin is giving her goosebumps.
"Ben?"
"Mmm?"
"Can you wrap your legs around me too?" she asks, her voice muffled into his bicep. She slowly inhales his scent as she waits for his response.
"Mmph. Legs comfy," he mumbles.
"Yes, but Rey cold," she insists.
When he still doesn't move, Rey bites down on his bicep, then softens it by slowly sliding her lips over his skin. As her lips close, she feels the sinfully smooth skin of his inner arm on her lower lip, contrasting with the rough skin of a scar against her upper lip. He is a beautiful contradiction. Her beautiful contradiction.
Ben had frozen during the process, his breathing now deceptively even. Too even to match the scampering heartbeat she feels against her back. She decides to toy with him… just a bit.
"You have to complete the cocoon," she demands. Playfully.
"Oh, do I?" he murmurs against her ear, relaxing again.
"Mhm." She nips at his arm again. Then reiterates, "Plus, I'm cold."
Exasperated, he shifts her body with one arm and pulls the blanket out from under her with the other. She maintains her cuddle ball throughout the movement, and tries not to think about the strength it must take to lift her like that.
And then the blanket comes over her and his other arm weaves back around her knee. Then his legs join, completely encasing her in his body.
She practically hums from the warmth and safety it brings. She wiggles her body back against him until he pulls her even tighter.
Then she can feel the reason why he didn't want to add his legs to their cuddles and grins to herself. She makes a point of resting her lips slightly open on his arm again, knowing he would feel the warmth of her breath. Knowing what her lips do to him.
When his hips press more firmly against her back, and she feels his length firmly pressed against her, she grins again against his skin.
Rey can feel Ben chuckle as he places his chin on the top of her head.
She is pretty sure she could die of happiness, wrapped up in his body like this. If only she didn't have to leave.
She feels tip of his chin move against the top of her head as he questions her, "I thought you wanted food?"
"I didn't say what I was hungry for," she counters, her grin now evil.
In response he shifts his head so that his mouth is by her ear once more. "You are insatiable."
"But if you're wondering…" she presses her ass against him suggestively. "Pancakes. I want pancakes." She grins to herself again, knowing this back and forth teasing must be driving him mad.
"Pancakes do sound good," he agrees. Is that a hint of disappointment she hears?
She nods, and her squished cheeks from the cage of his arms must make her face look like a chubby Porg. "Pancakes it is, then," she declares.
But neither of them move to leave the bed. She presses her shoulders back a bit, which just happens to press her modest chest against his arms. She feels his hands flex, probably of their own volition, around her legs. He growls in warning and she chuckles.
They lay there for a while, and eventually she hears Ben's stomach rumble.
He groans and attempts to extricate himself from around her, but Rey quickly protests and grabs his limbs to hold them in place.
She feels his chest rumble from laughter again. "Not that I'm complaining, but why do you enjoy cuddling me so much?" His tone is light, but sounds truly curious. Layered beneath that curiosity is a vulnerability that she has only heard a handful of times before. As if he cannot fathom the comfort of his presence.
Rey considers for a moment, wondering how much she should tell him. Then settles on the full truth. Well, almost all of it. Those three words would change everything if she said them.
"Well, because I've never really had a home… That is, until I laid in your arms. This right here?" She stretches herself out from his cocoon, then turns around to face him, wrapping her arms around his bare waist and looks up. The warmth in Ben's gaze could melt even the oldest glacier. She continues, "This is home. Wherever we are." She nuzzles her head into his chest, turning to the side until she can hear his heart beating. His arms wrap around her in return and pull her close. She squeezes her arms, bringing their bodies even closer together. "This is home."
He tightens his hold around her and firmly kisses the crown of her head.
His lips linger and he is curiously silent and still for a moment. For longer than a moment.
Then Rey feels his lips move to kiss her hair again, but it's not quite a kiss. More like a whisper of words that weren't given the breath to make a sound.
And when he covers her face with his and presses his cheek against her forehead, she feels a small point of wet warmth amongst the stubble on his face.
Concerned, she tries to pull back to look at him, but he fiercely places a warm hand around her neck, his thumb against her jaw. He holds her there against his chest like he is afraid she might disappear.
"I'll-" His breath hitches, and she can feel his jaw work against her forehead as he swallows. Then he continues with a fierceness that takes her breath away, "I'll always be your home, Rey. Whatever happens in this bastard of a war. I'll be your home."
They lay there like that for a while, in the eye of the storm of this terrible war, all thoughts of hunger (of either kind) forgotten. Rey isn't sure how long they stay there, wrapped in each others arms. But she does feel his lips against her forehead again, mouthing the words they are too afraid to say.
If only she didn't have to leave.