A one shot that may become more. I am a huge mulit-shipper, but Logyn really gets me. The Thor 2 trailer set my feels a glow again.
Anyway, enjoy my flowery writing.
Loki belongs to Marvel and the world and Sigyn belongs to herself and everyone.
My love is as a fever, longing still
For that which longer nurseth the disease,
Feeding on that which doth preserve the ill,
The uncertain sickly appetite to please.
My reason, the physician to my love,
Angry that his prescriptions are not kept,
Hath left me, and I desperate now approve
Desire is death, which physic did except.
Past cure I am, now reason is past care,
And frantic-mad with evermore unrest;
My thoughts and my discourse as madmen's are,
At random from the truth vainly express'd;
For I have sworn thee fair and thought thee bright,
Who art as black as hell, as dark as night.
Sonnet 147 by William Shakespeare
The air in Queen Frigga's dressing room was one of strange anticipation. Her attendants were plaiting her hair, piling it upon her head, golden braid after shiny golden braid. When they had finished, the queen motioned to dismiss everyone from the room, everyone except one unassuming lady-in-waiting. "Lady Sigyn, you will accompany me to the prison."
"Yes, milady." Sigyn stood as the queen approached, sensing her majesty's sullen mood.
"I won't be taking anyone else, nor will I be allowing my guards to accompany me." Frigga studied Sigyn's face, "But I wish to have company, nonetheless."
Sigyn gently smiled and nodded, following the queen through the servant's exit and into the hallway behind the queen's chamber, a hallway that led into the maze of pathways used by guards and servants. Lady Sigyn watched the older woman as they walked in silence through the many corridors into the more modestpart of the palace, the only sound the click of the queen's heels on the stone floor. Frigga's eyes gave away her emotions so plainly that Sigyn often wondered how she could be so subtle when she was ruling.
Unlike the other ladies-in-waiting Sigyn enjoyed an unusual closeness with the queen. Frigga was her aunt; half-sister to Sigyn's mother. The court viewed Sigyn as an illegitimate princess; being a product of her mother's naiveté, vanity, and greed. It was by Frigga's beneficence that Sigyn was given a title and, when she came of age, allowed to live in the palace and wait on the queen. In time Frigga had come to depend on her. Sigyn had a gift for empathy and had been a comforting balm to Frigga in the recent times, becoming very close to the royal family.
The two women stood outside the large steel doors that led to the prison chamber. Four guards flanked the walls on either side of the door.
"Leave us," the queen said softly but firmly. The guards turned away reluctantly, they had orders from their king, but a blazing look from their queen had them swiftly away. Frigga dropped her royal bearing when they were alone. She made no move toward the door and seemed to be holding her breath. Whether to hold back tears or curses, Sigyn could not tell.
It had been hard on the queen, to support her husband and care for their one remaining son while having to mourn in secret the loss of another. Frigga was a strong and wise woman, she knew that she had to appear unscathed by the political upheaval in Asgard that her adopted son had caused.
"Are you scared?" Frigga asked, not turning to face the young woman at her side.
"M'lady?" Sigyn whispered, confused.
"My…Loki is behind those doors. You know what he has done, what he is, what my son is…" Frigga's eyes stayed glued to the gilt doors.
"No. Im not scared. Not for my wellbeing… but I am afraid."
"Of what, dear Sigyn?" Frigga asked her voice thick with emotion.
"Of… of pain. The pain I know my lady will feel at the sight of my fallen cousin, and the pain I doubt not will be hidden in his eyes when he looks upon the mother he loves… and has hurt."
The queen looked at Sigyn, eyes filled with trepidation. Frigga was an intuitive woman; she could tell Sigyn wasn't telling her everything. "And what else? There is more you do not say," she questioned.
"My lady…" Sigyn paused, looking back to the doors, "I grew up with your son; he was my playmate, my quiet cousin…" My first kiss, she thought. "And though I haven't seen him since we were children, but once before his fall…" she abandoned her sentence. "I don't feel fear, no, only… sorrow."
The queen recovered herself, and stepping forward, entered the prison. The hall was large and oblong, and had been carved from stone long ago. Emblems of the ancient ones and Vanir symbolism wrapped around the pillars on either side of the door and were inset alongside the glass cells. The cells themselves were obviously new Aeser; gleaming white and bare. The glass-like walls, strongly wrought with magic, faced them, but the prisoner on the floor inside did not.
Sigyn stood back near the pillars while the queen strode up to the glass. She spoke quietly, too low for Sigyn to hear, but the girl could tell there was forgiveness, love, and desertion wrapped up in her tone. She heard only one reply from the man behind the glass, one reply that sent the queen quickly from the room, covering her mouth with her hand and motioning to Sigyn to let her be.
Sigyn didn't move. Though he hadn't seen her, she knew he knew she was there.
Her eyes blurred with unshed tears as she spoke. "In this you have been cruel cousin." She expected no reply and, when moments passed, she turned to leave.
"I have been as kind as I wish and not unjustly cruel."
Sigyn approached the glass. The gaunt figure that came into focus before her was less of a shell than when he returned from Midgard, but still far from being the beautiful cousin she remembered from before Thor's coronation.
"She came to see you. To see her son whom she loves-" She started thickly, but stopped when, with a sharp turn of his head, their eyes met.
"She is not my mother." The blue eyed prisoner said, words slipping towards Sigyn with searing intent.
"Show me another who has raised you with such love and kindness, and I will call her Loki-mother."
He looked her over, a quick pass of his eyes over her; dark golden head to slipper-clad feet.
"Does she know I asked for your hand?"
The question threw her for a moment. She studied him. His hair was long and tangled, but clean, he wore a tattered green tunic and moth-eaten britches and his feet were bare. But Sigyn was only interested in his face. He was good at lying, at hiding his true purpose and emotions, but he had already given himself away with that question.
"I saw no reason to tell anyone. I had thought your mind changed. You seemed focused on other matters," she said, searching his eyes.
He laughed with no joviality. "Yes, and I'm sure you are just dying with curiosity about my time destroying innocents on Midgard and attempting to assassinate dear Thor."
Sigyn wondered why they had to hint at hidden meanings in every sentence instead of talking with their true intent plain upon their tongues. "If you think I believe the gossip of court women and bigoted guards then you do not know me, Loki Odinson."
"If you truly believe that I am Odinson then you do not know me Sigyn Freyadottir." Loki was impassive, merely watching her, or so he seemed.
"I will believe whatever you wish me to believe, deluded-one." Sigyn sighed.
"You forget yourself, girl." Loki snapped, blue eyes blazing. Sigyn wanted to retort, to tell him how he could claim no sovereignty over her now that he was a prisoner, but she held her tongue. She sat down on the topmost step, against the wall opposite Loki.
"Are you eating, my Lord? Sleeping?" Sigyn asked. She forgot her anger at his reproach upon noticing he did not seem to have the strength to move.
He did not answer, but rolled his eyes and looked away. No then, she thought.
Time passed quickly and it grew dimmer in the prison hall. Sigyn didn't know what else to say. Thor had given her an account of what had come to pass in Jotunheim and Midgard, but she wondered what had happened to Loki when no one was there to witness it.
"Why are you still here?"
Sigyn jumped and looked up. He was studying her again.
"I don't want to leave." She said honestly.
He narrowed his eyes. "You are the first to visit me besides my former family."
She didn't answer at first; she didn't know how he expected her to respond. "I missed you. I know we only saw a little of each other before… you left."
He smiled a shadow of a smile. "Yes, I remember. You came to the palace only months before then; such unfortunate timing."
Sigyn was surprised when the remark, which he'd started sarcastically, ended in a genuine tone. She watched as the firelight danced in the reflection on the glass, blurring her view of Loki.
"I never gave you my answer that night." she smiled.
"It doesn't matter now, does it Sigyn?" Loki drawled unconvincingly dispassionate.
Sigyn stood up and walked over to where he sat, feet away from the glass. "Does it not? I told you then that I could not marry you because I was betrothed to one of your father's Crimson Hawks, and you said that was not an answer. Remember?" she spoke quietly, remembering the last fantastical night of her life, every one since spent in agony of one making or the other.
"Vividly, Fair one," Loki said, inching towards the glass. "You said you were too young for marriage, and if it was your choice you would marry no man, but since I was but a boy, you wouldn't mind being my bride."
Sigyn blushed and looked up, and was surprised to see Loki sat inches behind the glass. "I am not betrothed to him any longer. I was foolish then, and refused his courtship, because… well, I didn't expect you to disappear."
Loki had grimaced and looked away. "I did not expect it either."
"Where were you? Where did Yggdrasil toss you when you fell?"
A pained look came over Loki's face and he looked into her eyes. "I don't know."
Sigyn almost shivered, this was truly frightening, if Loki didn't know where he was, with his being one of the top most scholars of Asgard, then that place was not one Sigyn wanted to imagine.
"Tell me." Sigyn coaxed. "Let me be the judge Loki, and decide your innocence in my eyes." She said it so softly, that if anyone else had been in the room they would not have heard her unless they were sat where he was.
He glanced up at her, at the firelight flickering behind her, forming an orange halo around her head in the dimness. "I was found by the Chitauri, and I convinced them to give me an army to conquer earth. It would have been glorious Sigyn, and I could have made you a queen."
His short but reluctant speech made Sigyn suspicious of the Chitauri's behavior, they were not a race common anywhere; nomads wreaking havoc wherever they appeared. They would not have formed an alliance willingly unless they had their own motivation. "Do you think I was lying when I said I would believe anything you wished me to believe of you?" she said pleadingly. "You can tell me the truth now Lie-smith, it will not harm you with me."
Loki frowned, looking back at her, thoughtfully. "I know not what they would have done to me if I did not open the portal to Midgard; if Thor hadn't been there to bring me back. I am not ashamed that I did as they wished. I wanted it too, I could've been earth's ruler." He clenched his fists and Sigyn sighed.
"Then that is my truth. You should tell Thor, he would understand, he is yearning –" Sigyn started, but was cut off when Loki stood, glaring down at her.
"Thor can believe what he wants, I detest his pity, let them believe I am as mad as they say. That is how I want it." Loki spat. "Haven't you heard them talk? I am insane Sigyn, a despicable creature, loathed and overcome with madness!"
Sigyn stood as well, climbing to the top step to be taller. "Your madness isn't madness at all, its blindness, blindness to the love so freely given to you by your family."
"My family is of Jotunheim sweet child, of the ice and the cold. I am not Aeser!" Loki's voice rose in pitch.
Shocked by this admonition but not surprised (there had been rumors) Sigyn nearly shook with frustration. "You think what you are changes who you are and how I feel about you? Are you that stupid that you don't see how Thor would care about you no matter if you were a Giant, a dwarf or human! Your still Loki, damned you may be and as duplicitous as a snake but we love you!"
"We?" Loki's voice frosted over.
Sigyn took a deep breath. "Yes." And she was surprised to discover that she meant it, truly.
Loki's head made a thud as it fell forward to rest against the glass. "Oh Sigyn, how do my words flow freely in your presence? It's as if…" he was tearing up now.
Sigyn lifted a hand to the glass and pressed it where his cheek would be if the glass weren't there.
Why did he cloud his own mind with such self-hate and delusions of grandeur? It seemed so contradictory. He longed to be a ruler, he was born to be a king, but it was obvious that he never felt worthy. He felt like the monster he was rumored to be.
"You are in pain Loki. I understand." Sigyn started.
"No I don't think-." Loki interrupted.
"Let me finish! I know what it is to be scorned for things that aren't true, to be mocked and abused for things I didn't do or even contemplate. I know what it's like to feel your parents do not value you, and while I can't say that I am power hungry or feel betrayed by my race, I have a good idea just from watching you."
This was another reason that she was disliked by the court, whispered about behind her back for being an opportunist or for seeking to ingratiate herself in order to marry Thor. It was seldom that the court gossip got anything right and Sigyn wasn't going to be the first.
"I am broken, Sigyn." It wasn't even a whisper, it was a breath.
"Marry me." She said, pressing her forehead to the glass also.
"I…" he lifted his head and paused. He smirked. "You are asking me now? Well, who is getting dirty ideas little princess? Marry a prisoner? Shameful."
Sigyn smiled and shook her head. "And impossible by law. Yet I would. Don't ask me why, but I would."
"It seems we drag something out of each other neither of us is prepared for." Loki hummed intensely.
They were nearly nose to nose now against the glass, hovering. Steps echoed down the corridor outside and Sigyn's eyes widened. How long had she spent here, talking to the forbidden prince.
"I should go, I wasn't supposed to stay at all." Sigyn stepped back down the steps.
"Next thing you know you will be here in this cell with me darling." Loki grinned and sat down.
Sigyn blushed at those words, just imagining, as she reached the pillars.
"Farewell, Loki." She whispered heavily, hoping to avoid outside detection.
"My love." Loki bowed his upper body with a gesture he made graceful despite his seated-ness.
Sigyn smiled the first big silly smile she had in a long time and slipped out of the room. If she had turned she would have seen a similar expression on the prince's face.
If you like this, please review,
I have ideas for more little dreamy-snippets of Post Avengers Logyn,
so I may add to this! Well, thanks for reading! =)
Beautiful story picture belongs to lovelybonez
watch her on deviant art, she rocks.