kitten - where I make a brief, fluffy, attemp to understant what Meredith meant.
She bit her lip slightly, taking the bowl away from the stove carefully. The smell of chocolate filled the kitchen, sweet and subtle. A smile. Spending the friday nights at his house was certainly the best idea she'd ever had. It was quiet, simple and happy. Everything she needed and didn't had that week. All those murders, corpses, all the blood and all the gore, made the detective softer through the years. If she started the job as a fearless young cop, willing to do everything to change the world, she had now slowed that pace down a little. She sneaked out of the kitchen with a spoon in one hand and the bowl of melted chocolate in the other one. Just one night of stillness, a little bit of boredom, and she'd be back to business without a problem. Back to arresting the bad guys and trying to make – if not the world, at least New York – a better place.
Katherine Beckett let herself fall down to the couch and cruise-crosses her legs. She had just helped herself with a great amount of candy when his voice came from the office. "Whatever you're hiding from me, I want some." She swallowed and waited from him to appear in the living room, already picturing the image of a non-shaved-still-in-pajamas Castle.
"Now I know why you didn't go to the office to tell me you were home. You were too busy cheating on me with chocolate!" He cried, going through the bookshelves that served as portals for his private world of fantasy to enter reality again.
"Well, I do need to find something to do when you're working…" She said, as he sat down beside her.
"When you're working, I just work too."
"Well, not all of us get to sit in front a computer all day and claim to be employed." She said, shook her shoulders and ate more chocolate.
"You know, mom told me that, a few years ago, if I'm not mistaken."
"She was more than rig-"
It was normal for them to skip the welcome kiss routine and just tease each other until they start laughing themselves to tears. It usually took a long time, and each time was the funnier. But that night, Castle didn't seemed like playing. He interrupted her speech by reaching for a kiss. A gentle, smooth kiss on her lips, only to pick up the faint taste of chocolate in her mouth.
"What the hell…?" She chuckled. Her face was still close enough to his so she could feel him breathing.
"What? I can't kiss my girlfriend, now?" He moved away her.
"You know what I'm talking about, that's not how it happens… I mean, our Friday nights", she said, and helped herself with another spoon of candy. "You usually wait for me to say something that completely humiliates you and then pull me and we start making out. Is not that… cute."
"No making out for you today", he smiled. With a finger, he took a bit of the sweet goo from the bowl. "You have chocolate. It's far more important than me."
Beckett sighed. Sometimes he as too melodramatic, but it was just his way to say 'keep trying'. She kept trying, then. Put the chocolate aside, in the coffee table, and sat down closer to him, her legs above his.
"C'mom, Castle, all this can't be about the chocolate. What's bothering you?"
"Nothing, I'm just kidding." He laughed, caressing the soft skin behind her knee with his free hand as the other one reached to take a wisp of hair off her eyes.
Katherine said nothing. Just kept looking at him, with a serious expression, now. He looked away, but she didn't give up. It didn't take too long for him to succumb.
"I… Missed you. Just a little, don't get cocky."
So, it was about that. A week before, Kate didn't show up at his house for their night together, and the case she'd been working that week was getting complicated at every step, so she actually haven't got the time to explain that. They never talked about stuff like that. She had never, in the entire month they've been dating, heard him saying what he had just said. She'd never heard from him a single word about their relationship more serious than 'hey, want to go out for a pizza?'. Everything about them seemed always too shallow, in high contrast with the depths of their feelings.
"I'm sorry about last week. I swear it was not my fault, I left the 12th at 3 a.m., it was too late, and I didn't wanted to wake you up."
"That's why you have the keys, I mean… It's not the first time." Castle sighed, hating how his lack of control of his own emotions led the conversation to that.
Since the new captain arrived, their partnership had been dissolved. He had been convinced not just by Gates, but by Alexis too, that it was too dangerous; and even Beckett helped in the lecture about his safety being a priority. They haven't talked about that first kiss, yet. They haven't talked about Castle's confession – and he never tried it again. But Katherine started to visit him every day before going home and, suddenly, they were dating. Simple as that. Both of them felt good about it, but there were still something missing.
"I'm…" She lowered her head, unable to look at him in the eyes. "I just don't feel ok with entering the house in the middle of the night like I live here…" She paused for a couple of second and then said, almost laughing on how true it was, "I'm not ready, I'm sorry".
Her head was still low, but Castle leaned on her in a way that made her lie down on the couch. He never expected her to rush on that matter. If she wasn't ready, then she just wasn't ready. Castle lay beside her, with his head in her chest. Instantly, she started playing with his hair, twisting it in her fingers and stroking the skin next to his ear. "Let's just enjoy the weekend, shall we?"
"Are we ok? Like, really ok?" She asked, almost fearing he would start an argument around that.
"Of course we are, Beckett." He answered, rubbing his nose in her neck.
She smiled. Castle always knew how to respect the lines that still existed in their relationship. She thanked him silently every time something like that happened, every time he was so sweet after her being so insecure about what has been going on for so long.
"Now, what's this with you today? You miss me so much at the point of ignoring our weekly meeting procedure?"
She felt his smile in her skin, and he didn't answered. Oh, God, he did missed me that much?
"Castle, I think I might've found out why Meredith used to call you Kitten."
"C'mom, you're not starting with that too, are you?"
"Of course not, it's up to me to make up a new embarrassing name to call you."
"Can't you just settle for 'Castle'? It's weird enough to have my girlfriend calling me by my last name."
She laughed at the statement's truth. They haven't gotten used to first names, yet. He still called her Beckett, too.
"No, the boys said that if we are to date they have to have something to mock you with. But I'm telling you, your ex managed to get you personality just right with 'Kitten', you know?"
"Why?, because I'm cute, completely adorable, and women can't seem to stay away?"
She twisted his ear lightly, loving how he kept saying 'apples, apples!' between ouch's and fake pain moans.
"No, Richard Castle, and you better stop with the I'm sexy and I know it act."
Castle chuckled while she hugged him a little tighter suddenly needing him even closer. She pushed his head up with care. Fingers entwined in his hair. Legs entwined in his legs.
"You're like an wild animal. Always wandering around, always claiming to be free. But you're faithful to your true owner; she just need to scratch your ears a little bit," she demonstrated it "and you'll be in her lap asking for more everyday."
"It wasn't exactly like that. I mean, we divorced, remember?"
"I guess she just wasn't your rightful owner."
He let her words sink in his head a bit.
"And you're saying you are?"
"Yes."
He kept looking at the smile that formed in her mouth, without knowing what to say.
"You are actually claiming me as yours. Plainly saying I'm yours."
"Yes, you are mine."
Castle couldn't help but smile and admire the way the low lights were reflected in Beckett's eyes. He wanted to kiss her, to take her face in his hands and caress her skin. And then he remembered that he could.
"I'm yours." He said.
She bit her lip and let her face touch his.
And he couldn't resist.
"You really think I'm like a wild animal?"
"Oh, shut up you, Richard."