No Taxation Without Representation; America's Tax Day

America sat down to figure out his taxes. Yes, even he had to do his taxes. No exemptions or exceptions, even if he begged Uncle Sam. On his knees.

"Man, this sucks," he said, as he ran his fingers through his sandy blonde hair. "What was that saying, 'No Taxation without Representation'? Or something? Oh, I don't know, Dude!" He threw his arms in the air and fell over the desk, in frustration. "Why do stupid taxes exist? They cause me pain and it just means I have to spend more dough to buy that hot new video game…wait a sec…"

America realized that everything he bought somehow related to another country. "Hey! How dare Japan, no, Britain do this to me! Stupid tea…I don't even like tea…"

A few minutes past, and America still hadn't wrote anything. He was balancing the pencil on his upper lip and it fell. "OK!" America rolled up his sleeves and read the first line. "First and Last Name? Oh, darn coke, this is easy stuff!" But the pencil broke, so he picked up a pen (shouldn't he use a pen, anyway?).

But after a few easy ones, every line was getting harder. "Dude, I hate this stupid tax crap!" He got up to take a break, took a coke out of the fridge, and got distracted with his hot new video game. Plus, his righteous Alien Dude friend, Tony was there.

A few days past, and America still hadn't done his taxes. Every time he saw or walked past it, he waved it off, thinking he'd do it later. Then Tax Day was fast approaching. "Crap, I haven't even started!" He sighed in relief as he saw that it was, at least, half-way done. He picked up the pen and sat down. But he got distracted again. "Twinkies are bankrupt?! That sucks!" he ate a Twinkie to feel better.

Finally, America eventually got it done and the deadline was tomorrow. "Whoopee…" America waved a small American flag, sarcastically, as he slumped over the desk. "I owe the Government…big surprise…"

Tony held up his taxes. America looked over and snatched it from his hands. "No freakn way! You got a refund? How does that work? You're not even from Earth, much less America!"

Tony shrugged and said, "Bulking!"

The End