Disclaimer: I don't own, or claim to own, Kingdom Hearts or Freaky Friday. Not mine. If I did own Kingdom Hearts, there would be a lot less darkness and a lot more buttsecks. 8D A lot more buttsecks. n.n
o-o-o
Author's note: My second story! Much different from my first one and a lot more light hearted. Lotsa love to my BETA – Tayels. Check out her story 'R is for RETARDED' It's funny, I swear!! No really. XD So yeah, pairings are Riku/Sora early on and then later some Leon/Cloud and minor Zemyx… so… enjoy. n.n
o-o-o
Warning: Rated for male slash, language, a clichéd plot, stupid jokes and a whole lot of other reasons.
o-o
Freaky Tuesday
Chapter 1
o-o
Cloud Strife hated Leon Leonheart.
It was a fact of life. The sun rose in the morning, the world turned, underwear was not something you wore more than once and Cloud hated Leon. Besides the fact that the brunette was arrogant, rude and selfish plus an unimaginable list of superlatives that Cloud used to describe him everyday, he was arrogant, rude and selfish... and… okay maybe that was the extent of his vocabulary. Shame on him.
He had no problem with telling this to his face either.
"Stupid bastard! Stupid, self centered, bastard!" Ohh that was a good one Strife.
He hissed at Leon, staring holes into his back as he contentedly turned the corner. A few seconds ago, all Cloud was doing was innocently walking to his next class with his usual armful of books – but then that 'stupid bastard' strutted past and forcefully nudged his shoulder, sending everything he had scattering on the floor.
It wouldn't have been such a problem if it'd only been his stuff – but he'd been holding his best friend's books while he went to the bathroom… and Riku Masaki was a messy person. Hence, most of his papers had flown everywhere, the cover of one of his notebooks had come off (it had been bravely hanging on by a staple before) and… well…well, he was screwed.
Swearing, Cloud sunk to his knees and gathered everything in his arms, glaring at anyone and everyone that picked their way past the papers. Stupid Leon. Stupid, arrogant Leon. Stupid, arrogant, selfish, rude….
Riku knelt beside him and began to help, interrupting his mental tirade, a smirk lightly in place. "Leon again?" He asked sympathetically, before handing a few more papers to his friend.
Riku received a heavy sigh and nod in return, Cloud jerking his thumb in the direction he'd gone. "He went that way, if you wanna run ahead and beat him up for me…"
His best friend of four years laughed, "Even I'm not stupid enough to go up against the 'great' Leon Leonheart. C'mon Cloud, have you SEEN him getting changed for Phys. Ed? Those muscles would tear both of us apart."
He made a short, non committal noise in his throat. No, he hadn't seen those 'rippling muscles'. Unlike Riku, who was bi and proud of it, Cloud was straight as a pin thank-you-very-much and didn't look at boys the way his friend did.
Everyone knew that anyway.
For example the way Riku always fussed over his hair, checking it for split ends all the time. He even kept a brush in his locker. He constantly smelled like fruity shampoo too, it was like walking around with a freaking bar of soap. There was just no possible way that he could ever be straight Needless to say, Cloud never kept this fact quiet either and Riku hated him for it. He wasn't a very subtle person…
They finished gathering the books and Cloud got to his feet just as the second bell rang. He swore again – their next class was Chemistry and the Professor wasn't exactly known for giving out lollipops.
Or smiling.
Or anything that could be considered nice.
"Let's go." Riku said, hefting his books in one arm and turning towards their classroom. Cloud considered his options. There was nobody in the hallways, his books weren't that heavy… good enough.
"Hey Riks." He said, grinning. Within a couple of steps he'd caught up. Riku glanced at him, too intent on getting to their next classroom to pay attention to the mischievous glint in Cloud's eyes.
"What?" He replied quickly, flicking his fringe out of his face.
"You smell like a freaking bar of soap!" He laughed, triumphantly flipping the silver hair over Riku's face and rubbing his hand over it, messing it up completely.
If it'd been someone else, it would've been a joke, or a gesture of friendship between best friends.
To Riku, the blonde had just signed his own death certificate. His hands balled into fists just as Cloud danced out of his reach and sprinted down the hallway.
"STRIFE! GET BACK HERE!" He roared, chasing after him.
They didn't get to Chemistry until much, much later.
o-o-o
If he had to choose between Drama and Maths, he would've chosen Drama.
If he had to choose between Drama and English, he would've chosen English.
If he had to choose between Chemistry and a horrible, painful death… well, anything was better then sitting through an hour of science.
Sora's head was propped up on his hand as he stared at nothing in particular, his eyes unfocused and clearly not paying any attention at all. He hadn't been tired at all before he'd come into the classroom, but as soon as he'd stepped into the heat of the lab, he couldn't help but doze as Professor Xemnas droned on and on and on and …on….something about polymers…..
Beside him, his best friend had already given up the pursuit of learning and was… asleep. He smirked and poked him lightly, Leon stirring and shifting away from his hand, murmuring something.
What was that?
"I… I… can't…"
Now he was intrigued.
"Can't do what?" He said, leaning in closer to hear the reply. "What was that, Leon?"
His best friend mumbled something else, then irritably turned his head to the other side and lapsed back into a deep sleep.
Sora, meanwhile, clapped a hand over his mouth to stop himself from breaking out into hysterical laughter - a couple of giggles escaping despite his tight hold.
Unfortunately, during his bored surveillance of the room, Professor Xemnas' gaze landed directly on Sora. He didn't need to be any kind of intelligent to tell he was laughing, and considering he never joked in his lectures, he doubted it was at anything to do with Chemistry.
"Sora Harada."
He paused as the whole class's eyes swept to the brunette. Sora himself wilted under their piercing eyes and let his hands drop, feeling heat rush into his face with all the subtlety of a thundering train.
Buuuuussstteeedd.
"What do you deem so utterly hilarious that you insist on interrupting the class?" The Professor leant back on the board, but his gaze was sharp, boring into him.
He didn't point out that Sora hadn't actually said anything…
"I… er…" He started uneasily, "I… um…"
Xemnas raised an eyebrow. "Waiting, Mr. Harada."
Various lies were whizzing through his head, but he couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't get him in trouble. It was a coughing fit and he didn't want to pollute the classroom air for his fellow students, he made a mistake and miss spelt a word, he figured out that an acronym for Xemnas is Mansex…
"Right there… mmm… oh yeah,"
Somebody coughed.
"Leon?" Sora said in the sudden silence, looking panicked. Even Xemnas couldn't seem to believe his ears, and was staring silently at the usually stoic brunette with a sick kind of fascination.
"Oh yeah… don't… don't stop…"
The door burst open.
Sora squeaked, the class startled out of their shocked silence. Even Leon raised his head, fully awake and looking like he'd never been asleep. He made a silent pact never to mention this again, and looking around, saw that most of the class felt the same way.
Either that or they'd forgotten – as all their attention was focused on the doorway, where two people stood panting.
One he recognised – Cloud Strife. His blonde hair was mussed and his face was bright red but his blue eyes were glinting with barely concealed amusement.
Sora glanced sideways at Leon, seeing the brunette's eyes narrowed as he glared icily at the blonde. He didn't understand the rivalry between them but let it be in case he got caught up in it.
Beside Cloud was someone Sora didn't know. He'd seen him around of couple of times – silver hair, bright aquamarine eyes and kind of… hot.
Although his hair was messier then usual, he still smelt like a tropical punch and that more than anything confirmed Sora's suspicions.
That had to be Riku, the first openly bi person he knew of at the school, generally unpopular because of it.
"Mr. Strife and Mr. Masaki. Nice of you two to join us." Professor Xemnas drawled, coldly gesturing for them to come inside. The two of them dragged themselves in and plonked themselves at a table.
"You two can join Harada and Leonheart in detention this afternoon."
"WHAT?!" Four voices chorused simultaneously.
"That's not fair!"
"We were only five minutes late,"
"What did I do?!"
"Not with him."
The Professor sighed heavily and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Yes it is fair Mr. Harada, considering your outburst is what disrupted my class in the first place. You were fifteen minutes late, Mr. Masaki, not five. You were sleeping in my class, Lionheart, and Strife you'll put up with Lionheart whether you like it or not. Now would you all /SHUT/THE/HELL/UP/?!"
Sora instantly quieted, his gaze flickering to Leon, who was glaring daggers at the front of the room with a scowl fixed heavily on his face.
"Good."
Professor Xemnas continued, like he'd not just sworn at a classful of sixteen year olds, "Now where were we. Ah yes, the chemical compounds used in this formula are ones you're familiar with. Carbon forms are the base of..."
But Sora didn't hear what carbon forms were the bases of, as he noticed Leon had fallen asleep yet again and he caught himself staring at the clock…yet again.
Forty whole minutes of torture left.
Then a couple of hours of detention.
He groaned and put his head down on the desk, surrendering to the sleepy fog that was threatening to engulf his mind. He was going out with Leon on the weekend – that was something to look forward to, at least…
o-o-o
Forty minutes, several notes, a couple of naps and a faked epileptic fit later, the bell finally rang. Cloud sighed with relief, but then remembered the detention he had and brought his hand to his forehead with a distinct slapping sound.
Two hours with Leon Leonheart. At least Riku was there and Sora wasn't too bad. It could be worse.
It could be him and Leon alone.
Cloud suppressed a shudder, looking back at the aforementioned brunette.
Leon was glaring at him.
Not the 'I-want-you-to-die' kind of glaring, but the 'I-want-you-and-the-stupid-woman-that-spawned-you-and-anyone-that-would-bother-to-be-friends-with-a-complete-asswipe-such-as-yourself-and-even-your-cute-pet-bunny-to-be-shot-stabbed-struck-by-lightning-and-impaled-on-a-spork-and-die-a-horrible-and-painful-death' kind of glaring.
He turned back around.
Riku clapped his shoulder cheerfully, but it didn't help clear the mournful look that had settled on his friend's face.
"Don't worry, you'll only be stuck with him for the next… oh… 120 minutes or so."
Cloud gave up all pretences of being mature and pouted.
Professor Xemnas chose that moment to look up from his desk, smiling maliciously, catching the look on the blonde's face. Unfortunately, he valued the contents of his classroom and knew better then to make the two hated enemies work together. He'd save it for another time.
"Strife, as much as I don't like you, I don't want you and Leonheart to destroy the classroom. So I'm putting you with Harada. You can clean these mixtures on my desk. I trust you know how to dispose of chemicals correctly?"
His arm swept towards his private workstation, which was cluttered with beakers of different coloured liquids.
Sora and Cloud both nodded, a blatant lie – but Sora didn't want another lecture from Mansex and Cloud was so overjoyed with not being with Leon that he didn't care.
"Meanwhile, Masaki and Leonheart – you're coming with me."
Riku scowled heavily, the cheerful expression well and truly vanished. Cloud returned the clap on the shoulder whole heartedly.
"Good luck bro!" He said, almost laughing.
Xemnas left the room, Leon whispering something that made Sora blush before trundling after the Professor – Riku slouching behind at a more leisurely pace.
The door slid shut after them and Cloud breathed out slowly, turning to the brunette.
"What's between you and Leon anyway?" Sora cut in.
He raised an eyebrow. Whoa, he hadn't been expecting that. He didn't answer immediately, waiting until they'd both moved to the front of the room and picked up a test tube, examining the yellow sludge in it carefully.
"Cloud?"
"Well… we never really got along. I mean we've been in the same class every year since I came to this school." He shrugged lightly, holding the tube upside down over the sink. It made a hissing noise as it dripped onto the metal.
"Grade four. He was my buddy. He was supposed to show me around."
Sora tipped another mixture in and nodded, staring apprehensively as the blue mixture hit the yellow and it turned a sort of sickly green.
"But he wouldn't. He was always hanging around his own friends. He was so up himself… still is. No offense."
"None taken," The brunette responded automatically, giving up cleaning to watch Cloud with a sort of morbid fascination. Cloud was hitting the bottom of a beaker, as the purple sludge which had congealed in the bottom refused to move.
"Uh Cloud – are you sure we're supposed to be putting this in the sink?"
"Don't worry about it. I've done it heaps of times." He said reassuringly, hitting the bottom of the beaker harder. The purple sludge still refused to budge.
"Anyway, so, Leon was a right asshole and kept ignoring me. I was socially inept in grade four so I wasn't exactly making friends left and right either…"
The sludge finally dropped ominously on top of what was already there. The different colours mixed together and the whole thing turned brown, bubbles rising lazily and a small amount of steam starting to emit.
Sora watched it warily, taking a step backwards. Cloud hadn't noticed any changes and was busy digging out what was left of the purple mass.
"So anyway I wanted to get back at him but I didn't know how – so I hit him with a ruler. He hit me back with his ruler then this whole fight broke out. Lucky it was between classes, or we would've gotten in so much trouble."
The last of it added to the mixture, the blonde threw the tube in another sink and picked up a beaker of clear red liquid.
"I didn't know the ruler was that sharp. I got tired so I pegged it at him and suddenly he's bleeding with this massive gash down the middle of his forehead. I mean, who woulda thought, huh? I got suspended. My parents didn't care, but Leon did. Still hasn't forgiven me. I don't think he ever will…"
He started to tip it over the sink, the drips sizzled and a couple of low 'pops' echoed through the empty classroom. Sora was the only one who noticed – Cloud still ranting – but it was too late.
The rest of the red liquid followed the forerunners and was poured liberally over the concoction. There was a second of silence as it fell through the air, Sora staring with a hand still reaching out to stop Cloud, and the blonde's own face forming a silent 'oh'.
Then it hit.
There was a flash of light, but that was all Cloud and Sora saw before everything went black.
o-o-o
"Yeah, right, like yo-"
A flash of light flashed through the room as a huge 'BOOM' shook the windows of the science block. Riku stumbled and grabbed a desk to stop himself from falling, as behind him he heard glass smash on the tiles. Leon cursed loudly.
"What was that?"
It was the first thing he'd said that wasn't insulting Riku's towards mum.
Xemnas had set them to clean everything in this massive cabinet that sat at the back of the science room – models of brains, books, stuff like that. But the professor had left when his phone had rang, so since then all they'd done was glare and argue and Riku was in a shitty mood because of it.
"How the hell would I know?" He snapped back, closing the door he'd been wiping and throwing the cloth on the bench.
He met the scowl with a scowl of his own. They glared each other for almost a full minute before Riku looked away.
And the score remained, Leon: 31, Riku: 0.
The door burst open for the second time that day and Riku whipped around to find Professor Mansex standing in the doorway, looking like he'd just run all the way from the staffroom. He regarded them both with an even look.
"Did you two do that?"
Riku and Leon both shook their heads.
"Right, then hurry up, I haven't checked on Cloud and Sora yet." The fact that he had checked on them first was annoying, but it was a sign of his distress that he called them by their first names.
Riku chose not to comment and the three of them hurried out of the room. Shit. What if something had happened to Cloud? He shot a glance at Leon, but as usual, his face was an expressionless mask.
They got to the other science classroom, Riku stepping in front of his Professor and shoving his way inside to the two bodies that lay sprawled on the ground.
"CLOUD!" He yelled; worry making his voice break as he dropped to his knees beside his best friend and checked his pulse. Likewise, Leon knelt beside Sora, anxiously feeling for his heart beat.
"He's alive." Riku sighed, sitting back on his haunches.
Leon nodded. "Sora too." He muttered, unable to keep the relief from his voice.
Xemnas studied them, swaggering over to the sink where they'd been working and where white mist was still rising from the bench.
Surprisingly, none of the beakers had broken, but where the sink had been was just a hardened pile of melted metal, melded firmly with the top of the pipe. He raised a silvery eyebrow before casting his gaze down at the four teenagers.
Funny, he'd left them alone because he'd thought he could trust them. It'd be a long time before he made that mistake again.
He met Riku's anxious gaze and Leon's stony countenance and sighed. "Right well, I don't think there's much we can do here. I don't know what they did or how they managed to knock themselves out in the process, but as long as they're okay then I guess it's alright for them to go home."
Riku nodded, already Cloud's arm around his shoulder and hoisting the blonde to his feet. "I can take Cloud, if that's okay, Professor?"
Mansex – ah – Xemnas smirked. "I though as much – and you're alright to take Sora home, right Leon?"
Leon nodded, scooped Sora up bridal style and left without a word. Riku rolled his eyes and followed suit, Cloud's feet dragging as he thanked whatever being in heaven that the science classrooms were on the first floor.
The door shut behind them and the Professor sighed, slumping down into his chair.
His hand found the bridge of his nose, shutting his eyes as he considered what had happened. Hopefully he'd be able to hide the sink and when everyone got back tomorrow, Harada and Strife would be right as rain.
But what were the chances of that??
o-o-o
Preview of next chapter: Sora meets the parents and weighs the pros and cons of boxers, while Cloud discovers a secret that could scar him for life.