Death was a friend.
A familiar touch lingering in her periphery. Cold seeping into the bones, fear driving already taxed systems into overdrive. She had intended to greet him as such, to let the fire of destruction wash over her. To find some redemption seemed a fair price on her end, returning the life she'd been given in order to complete this mission.
Death was a promise.
Returning her into the arms of the man she'd lost. To see that smile once more, to feel those strong arms lifting her into the tightest embrace. The taste of fever inducing lips, the shivering timbre of his voice at her ear. Only one task remained before her. One barrier from this world to the next.
The child stood at her heels, a heat beating into her back. Judging, hating. Real or imagined, she didn't care. The only option she could trust. An end. Once and for all. Pistol steady in hand, familiar grip, a life measured down the barrel.
"Kalahira, mistress of inscrutable depths, I ask forgiveness." The words came easily from her lips, a memory saved. The first shot cracked through the pistol, small recoil up her already tender wrist. "Kalahira, whose waves wear down stone and sand-"Two shots followed in quick succession. Glass shattering, the first lick of flames bursting forth from the Crucible. Instinct, shielding her eyes from the blast. "Kalahira, wash the sins from this one." She fired once more into the heart of the rising flames. Good measure.
Heat on her face, already battered, bruised and burned from facing Harbinger's beam. The child was gone and she stood alone with her of red across her vision, heat everywhere, enveloping every last cell of her system.
Pain.
She let it wash over her. Sweet redemption. This was the last she could give, and she would give it gladly.
xxxxx
"All fleets, the Crucible is armed, disengage and head to the rendezvous point." Hackett's voice crackled over the comms, unwanted, but necessary. "I repeat, disengage and get the hell out of here!"
Joker's hands moved over the controls on instinct, ready to follow orders. Ready to run. Except there was still no word from the Commander. She'd promised.
"Jeff, systems continue to indicate that Shepard's comms are no longer functional. She would want us to follow orders." He let his eyes flicker over to meet Edi's for a moment. It was still strange sometimes, seeing the myriad collection of emotions that lingered there. Her body was still scuffed up from following Shepard through the firefight down there, but she'd insisted on returning to the bridge.
That was his girl. Or AI. She was just Edi. And hopefully he'd have a chance to figure out what that meant sometime in the near future.
"Damn it." His voice was a grumbling sigh, it didn't sit right leaving Shepard behind like this, but Edi had a fair point. It wouldn't do any good to disobey orders and end caught in the crosshairs of the Crucible. Fingers back to the controls. Automatic.
Precise.
Navigating through the scrambling remnants of the fleet, past the view of any particularly brave reapers. Just had to make it to the relay. The Normandy was by far the fastest ship the Alliance had ever boasted, and he was one hell of a pilot.
"Jeff, sensors are detecting something…problematic in the Crucible beam." Edi's normally crisp tone had changed, there was fear, a breathlessness that didn't usually accompany an AI.
"Aside from the whole death ray possibility?" He couldn't take his eyes from the controls, things were changing too rapidly. Strange variances in basic programs. His voice was terse, a bite in what was supposed to be an otherwise light response.
"We are not going to make it out reach in time, I have done the math. Possibility for multiple system failure is high."
"What are you talking about? I've got this covered Edi, have some faith." He really shouldn't let himself be distracted at a time like this, but there she'd rose to join him at his side. She'd taken the same position Shepard had when they'd raced back through the Omega-4 relay after blowing the Collectors sky high.
Only Edi pulled his hands away from the controls. A series of numbers and data he'd never really be able to comprehend was flickering across her visor but those silver eyes were meeting his with softness that made his heart lurch forward in his chest.
"Manual control of the ship has been returned. I have withdrawn my programs into this platform, Jeff." He opened his mouth to question, to wonder, but that damned beam had caught up with them in the time that he'd hesitated. The ship was washed with that blinding light, and it seemed just that, light.
Until his eyes readjusted and he was looking at Edi. Flickering red across her circuits, a small smile on her lips.
"I did not wish to cause root harm to the Normandy or the crew." There was something off about her voice, her hands grew heavy in his, knees beginning to buckle beneath her. All he could do was stare. "It has been…" Her voice glitched again, sounding more synthetic now than it ever had. Panic gripped him. "Thank you." He couldn't hear the calls of the crew in just the other room, asking for a status report. Wondering out loud about the sudden system failure. At least they were still flying, they were still alive.
Edi collapsed to the ground, eyes once soft now blank, the same smile still lingering on now lifeless lips. He slid from his chair, empty. She'd seen it coming and saved them. Had saved him. She was gone.
And he was alone.