I do not own Black Lagoon or any of its characters.
I also want to give credit to FanFic writer Randomonium. I love the Balalaika & Chang stories.
Updated: 10/18/13
Beach Blanket Bingo!
A low rumble of engines broke the silence as the PT boat slid on the calm waters of the South China Sea. In the pilot house, the man named Dutch watched the control panel as the Black Lagoon cruised along at an easy 20 knots. Wow, he thought, it's as smooth as glass out here today. The boats running fine but I really wish I knew where we were going. He glanced to his left and right at the men standing on either side of his command chair. To his left was Sergeant Boris of the Russian mafia Hotel Moscow, to his right was Biu, Mr. Chang's #1 from the Triad. Dutch had known both men for years and was not bothered by their presence. What disturbed him was all he had for a destination was a set of GPS coordinates. The black man was not worried about what was out there, the radar, sonar and other sensors would keep the Black Lagoon out of any navigational trouble, but he hated not knowing who was at the other end of the trip. That's what will get you killed, he thought as he heard the floor hatch at the rear of the bridge open. Looking back he saw Balalaika, head of Hotel Moscow climbing up from below.
"Dutchy! How much longer till we arrive?" the blond woman asked as she stood up.
"About another hour at this speed. Do you want me to speed up?" Dutch said as Balalaika leaned over his right shoulder to look at the control panel.
"No, no, this is fine, there is no hurry and it's such a nice calm day for a boat ride."
As she turned and began to climb the ladder up the gun turret, Dutch looked back and got a shot of her long legs as they climbed higher up the ladder. As he turned his attention back to the control panel he noticed the other two men watching her also. Dutch cleared his throat and muttered quietly, "Eyes front gentlemen."
Biu snickered and Boris grimaced and grunted, "So true Dutch."
"Boris? You really can't tell me where we are heading?" Dutch asked.
"Really, Dutch, you know everything I do!" Boris said.
They both looked at Biu, who shrugged his shoulders, "I didn't know we were going anywhere until we got out of the car at the Lagoon dock this morning."
"hmmm…" Dutch murmured as he stared out the front windows again remembering earlier that morning.
000
Balalaika had called Dutch several days before and asked if the Lagoon Company was busy for a couple of days. They worked out the details, then at 6 am the appointed morning, a truck had arrived and began loading crates onto the boat. Dutch leaned on the deckhouse smoking with Revy Two-Hand while watching as their Japanese salaryman, Rock directed the loading and storing according to a list he had been given.
"What's all this about Dutch?' Revy asked as she lay top of the deckhouse, groaning over the fact it was so early and as usual she was hung over.
"Your guess is as good as mine Revy." Dutch said as Rock walked up and lit a cigarette. "Everything going ok Rock?" the man asked as Rock scratched the back of his neck while looking at the papers in his hand.
"Yeah Dutch, its cool, but I'm confused about some of these orders. Certain crates are marked for deck storage and others are for cabin and hold storage only. This is the first time Balalaika has ever sent us a loading plan like this, usually she lets us handle it."
"I don't know Rock, all she told me was it was precious cargo and she would be supervising it herself." Dutch said as he watched a black Mercedes drove up and Balalaika got out with her sergeant, Boris. She walked down the dock to talk to the loaders as Boris spoke to the driver of the Benz.
"Dutchy!" Balalaika called out as Rock helped her aboard, "Is everything loaded and ready to go?"
"Yep," Dutch said, "just waiting on you to say cast off."
"It will be a few minutes. I am waiting on a few people" She said as she leaned over to get a good close look at Revy who was still lying on the deckhouse watching Balalaika with one eye open.
"Whas'up big sis?" Revy groaned as she covered her face.
Balalaika snickered as she said, "Gee Two-Hand, you need to leave off the booze once in a while and get some sun, your starting to look pale!"
Revy groaned again and muttered, "No…sunlight bad…the darkness loves me…."
Balalaika snickered again as she winked at Rock, "You need to take better care of your partner Rock!" she said as she puffed on her trademark Cuban cigar. She turned toward the end of the dock as two more people walked up. "Jane! Eda!" she called out, "Glad you could make it!" as Greenback Jane and Eda the nun from the Church of Violence climbed aboard.
"Hi Miss Balalaika!" Jane said as Eda nodded to everyone and went over to torture Revy. "Ah um what is it you need me to do for you?" the hacker asked with a puzzled look on her face.
"Nothing right now Jane, go find that blond boyfriend of yours and keep him company" Balalaika told her.
Dutch was even more confused as he pointed down below decks letting Jane know Benny was in the computer room. The Indian woman made her way below as two more cars drove up to the dock.
"Ah," Balalaika said, "This should be the rest of our group now!"
Boss Chang and his #1 man Biu got out of the first car while Shenhua, Sawyer the Cleaner and Rotton the Wizard stepped out of the other. Chang waved as he strode down the dock and climbed aboard.
"Greetings everyone! Well we are all looking chipper today!" He leaned over, looked around Dutch, squinting one eye at Revy. "Well SOME of us are chipper at least! Morning Rebbeca!" he said with a grin. Revy groaned again as Eda pulled out a flask from her nuns robes and poked it at her, telling her to drink some of it. Chang turned and bowed kissing Balalaika's hand while the rest of his group climbed aboard. "Ah the lovely Balalaika! I hope you are eager and ready for our business today?" he said while one eyebrow climbed over the top on his shades.
"Really Chang you must work on your sucking up! All that and I am not hot or bothered at all!" she smirked as she winked at Dutch. Chang cackled as Balalaika told Dutch, "That's it Dutchy, light her up and lets go, we got places to see! Cast off! Oh! This is your crew today, use them as you will! Come forward Chang and let us speak of great things!"
Dutch, Boris and Biu stared after them as she went forward with Chang following her, making no bones about the fact he was watching her swaying hips as she walked.
Dutch stood there for a few seconds, let out a sigh and said, "Rock, you and Boris get the bow line and Biu you and …ah..uh.."
"Rotton, Rotton the Wizard at your service!" the silver haired young man said with a sweeping bow.
"Uh, ok, right," sputtered Dutch. "Y'all get the stern line and be ready to push off." As Dutch turned to go below, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. Sawyer the Cleaner, one of the most feared people in all of Roanapur, was sitting astride one of his torpedoes riding it like a pony. She was bouncing and slapping her butt with her hand while Shenhua rattled at her in English and Chinese trying to get her off. "Uh ladies?" Dutch called out. "You do realize those are LIVE torpedoes, don't you?"
Sawyer grinned happily and nodded while bouncing away as Shenhua called out, "I try Dutch! She crazy girl! Can't take her anywhere!"
Dutch nodded and with a little bead of sweat running down his brow, started into the bridge.
The big man sat in his control chair and pushed the starter buttons. Rock called down that all lines were in and they were ready to shove away from the dock. The boat quivered as the three 12 cylinder marine engines roared to life. "Push us off Rock!" Dutch said into his headset and the boat began to drift away from its mooring. He slid the engines into gear and slowly opened the throttles. As the Lagoon began to slide across the harbor, Boris and Biu came onto the bridge and stood by his chair.
000
Three hours later, they were coming up on the coordinates when Chang called down, "Dutch, swing out west a little and approach the island from there."
Dutch made a sweeping turn to starboard, while keeping an eye on the island they were approaching on his port.
"Dutch! Radar contact bearing 208 degrees 25 nautical miles! Surface ship and it's bigger than us!" Benny called out over the headset.
Dutch flipped the intercom switch and said, "Everyone! We have a surface contact at 25 miles to the southwest! Get a hold onto something in case we have to evade!"
"Dutchy! It's alright, I have it under control!" Balalaika called down, "keep your heading till I talk to them." Balalaika stepped to the foredeck where Dutch could see her talking on a Sat phone.
"Hmmm…" Dutch thought "is this who we're meeting?"
Balalaika gave Dutch a thumb up after she spoke on the phone for a few minutes, and then came down into the bridge. "Don't worry Dutch, that is the Tapi, a Thai navy corvette that is in the area doing maneuvers the next few days. They are going to be our watchdog while we are in the area." she said as she smiled sweetly. "The captain owes me a little favor."
I don't want to know why the captain of a royal navy ship owes her a favor, Dutch thought as he began to bring the Lagoon back to port and line up on the island.
"Biu! Boris! Top side!" Chang called down.
The two men looked at each other and shrugged before climbing on deck.
Revy came sliding down the ladder of the gun turret to stand behind Dutch. "Hey big daddy, Boss Chang says to look for a small dock off to our port and tie up there," she said as she pointed to the left.
"Yeah, I see it." Dutch said as he slowed more and more till they were barely moving, "Rock! Get ready to tie us up! Benny, tag that contact as a friendly and set your squawk box where it will ping us through the loudspeaker if we get another contact. Then come on deck."
"Aye, aye skipper!" Benny replied.
The PT boat slid slowly into place as Rock and Boris jumped to the dock to tie her up. Once Rock signaled they were secure, Dutch shut down the engines and locked his controls. He climbed on deck to see a beautiful white beach that curved around in a bow to create a lagoon. The island was small; maybe one half to three quarters mile long, with trees set back a hundred feet or so from the water line. He could tell it must be narrow also, maybe a quarter mile across with just a couple of small hills to break the wind. Just in the edge of the trees was a Tiki hut like building with a raised floor and thatched roof that looked old, but was in good repair. On the beach there was a fire pit with logs for sitting and a pile of fire wood stacked nearby. Balalaika was already getting everyone organized with the unloading of the boat and having the crates carried and placed next to the hut.
"Dutch? You help yes?" Balalaika called out from the dock.
"Give me just a minute to check the engines, in case we have to cut lose and make a fast run for it," he called back. She waved and grabbed Rotton, telling him where to put something. The captain climbed down into the engine room and checked oil, water levels and fittings. When he was satisfied all was in order, he climbed out on deck to find most of the crates that had been onboard were sitting near the hut. Before he could step to the dock, Balalaika called them all back to the side of the boat.
"Ok Gentlemen, Chang will tell you what to do while we ladies have a meeting in the aft cabin." Balalaika said as Chang motioned for the men to follow him.
Dutch stood on the dock looking at Balalaika for a moment and asked, "Miss Balalaika? What's going on? Who are we meeting out here in the middle of nowhere?"
Balalaika patted him on the shoulder and said, "Don't worry Dutchy, it will all become clear in a moment. Just go and listen to what Chang has to say and you will know all then." She stepped aboard the boat and disappeared below.
Dutch watched her with on eyebrow raised and then walked up the beach to where Chang had the rest of the men standing around him.
"Ok guys everybody pick a crate and open it up! All will become clear as you do!" Chang said as he rubbed his hands together in anticipation.
Rock opened his box first and after looking inside he looked up at Dutch and said, "Beach Chairs?"
Rotton turned from his box holding Tiki torches and fuel.
Boris reached into his and came out with cooking utensils.
Biu looked down in to his box and said, "Hey! This one full of steaks and meat, with all sorts of other food!"
Benny's had folding tables and Dutch's had a grill setup that could be assembled over the fire pit.
They all stopped and looked at Chang as he laughed, "Yep! That's the big secret! Welcome to Balalaika's Beach party!"
Boris slapped his forehead and said, "Oh no…Beach Blanket Bingo…" He turned to the others. "That's what this is all about! The Kaptain has been watching all these American teenage beach movies lately and about a week ago started planning something in secret!" Boris looked at Chang, "Well I guess at least one other person knew what was going on."
Chang shrugged his shoulders and said, "She called me and asked about an island where someone could have a cook-out without being disturbed. I knew about this place and thought it would be the perfect setting."
"And just what is this place?" Dutch asked as he waved his arm towards the hut and dock.
"This is a safe haven for local small boat fishermen." Chang told them, "Sometimes they get caught in a storm or something and will tie up here for a bit to let it pass over. There are several in the South China Sea and gulf, but only the locals know where they are. They work together and keep them up, repairing the docks and huts when needed."
They all turned toward the torpedo boat as the sound of cheers and gales of laughter echoed from the hatches of the aft cabin. "Hey, Hey! Looks like the girls are getting ready so we need to get this stuff set up quick!" Chang said as he opened a crate and began to pull blankets and beach towels from it.
With all of them working together, it only took a few minutes to unpack and assemble everything. Just as they finished Chang looked toward the boat and exclaimed, "Holy crap!"
The others turned and their mouths dropped opened as they saw the ladies walking down the dock towards them. Balalaika was leading in a one piece bathing suit with a beach jacket that made the burn scars that slashed across her body look like part of the suit.
Crap! Dutch thought, I knew that woman was built but I never thought she looked like that! He turned his head and looked as he heard the box Rock had been carrying hit the ground. The man's eyes were almost rolling back into his head, and his jaw hung slack as he fought to stay on his feet. Dutch looked back at the girls and realized the two behind the mafia boss were Revy and Eda. Oh my god…. Dutch thought as he almost staggered himself at the sight.
Both the girls were walking, strutting really, and waving their arms like runway models. They both had on string bikinis that left not much to the imagination. Eda's was done up like an American flag and her DD breasts swayed back and forth as she walked. Revy had on a flowered suit that brought out the color of her hair and eyes. Her taunt body seemed to glide along with a smoothness that told of the muscle tone hidden under her skin.
She's never been a slouch in the breast department either. thought Dutch as the two surrounded Rock, and began to fawn over him.
Next came Jane, who everyone knew was built like the proverbial brick house, but had only enough string and cloth to cover the bare essentials.
Benny is in soooo much trouble with that one! thought Dutch as she slid up to the blond computer tech. She reached out and began to rub his chest as Benny broke out in a cold sweat.
Dutch turned to the last two and saw Sawyer, who was still hyperactive as hell, bouncing up the beach in a black and purple Goth looking suit that fit her personality. Dang, that little girl is a lot more shapely than I thought! as his eyes were drawn to the last in line.
Shenhua wore a one piece suit that was open in front from her breasts to her navel. She walked smooth and silky, like a snake that glided along the sand. As she walked by Biu, she reached up and scratched his chin with one long fingernail, then glided over to do the same to Rotton, as Sawyer bounced around them in circles.
Balalaika stopped in front of Chang, took a drag from her Cuban, "Like what you see Babe?"
Chang grinned like the Cheshire cat and said, "Oh hell yeah! And don't call me babe."
Balalaika cocked her head to one side and said, "Sergeant? You're staring."
Boris snapped to attention and shouted, "Yes Kaptain!" as sweat broke out on his brow.
She reached out and patted him on his shoulder and said, "At ease Boris! Don't worry, we are off duty today."
Boris wilted and began to rub the back of his head while trying to look anywhere, but at his boss.
Balalaika stepped back, "Alright gentlemen!" she called out. "A box awaits you in the forward cabin. When you come back please bring the final boxes in the hold."
The men filed down the dock to the boat as the girls began to dig through the items on the beach. Chang had just opened the box as Dutch entered the cabin and was dragging out all sorts of swimwear, Hawaiian shirts and sandals.
Rock was holding up a shirt and muttering, "If I wear this Revy will kick my ass because it's not the one she gave me!"
Dutch patted him on the shoulder and told him, "Don't worry Rock, she'll understand you didn't know, and if she don't, I'll talk to her."
Rock sighed and started to pull his tie off and unbutton his shirt.
Chang held some swim trunks out to Dutch, but the big man shook his head and said, "I got some in my bunk." Chang nodded and began to dig into the pile again as Dutch went towards the stern.
A short time later the men came back out on deck. They brought with them the boxes from the boats hold, which they now realized were full of beer and liquor of everyone's favorite brands.
Balalaika met them at the end of the dock and inspected each man as he passed. She paused as she came to Rotton. "Oooo…ah Rotton?"
He stopped and said, "Yes ma'am?"
"You wear that really well." She said and shooed him on toward Shenhua and Sawyer who stood slack jawed. Rotton was the only one who picked a Speedo style bathing suit.
Shenhua and Sawyer shot Eda a viscous look as Eda raised her pink sunshades and said, "Well DAMN!" while gawking at Rotton. The nun then turned and began to fawn over Rock, much to Revy's displeasure.
As Chang passed Balalaika she asked, "Where's Dutch?"
Chang motioned over his shoulder with his thumb and said, "He's coming."
Balalaika watched as Dutch stepped off the boat and walked up to her. Dutch was always known for wearing US Marine green fatigue pants, t-shirt and a flak jacket with jungle style combat boots. Balalaika shook her head as she looked at the man standing before her wearing, US Marine green fatigue shorts, no t-shirt, his flak jacket and his jungle style combat boots. She laughed walked over, hugged him around the waist and said, "Oh Dutchy! Please don't ever change!"
He patted her on the back and snorted while pushing his sun shades back up on his nose from where he had been looking over them at her. "I need a beer." he said as they walked to where the party was starting.
Rock and Rotton set up a volleyball net, while Biu found a boom box and started some music, with 'Heat Wave' by Martha and the Vandellas.
Dutch paused a moment as thoughts of Viet Nam, Radio First Termer and the music of the day began to run through his mind. "Love that music baby." He said to himself. He noticed Sawyer cutting steaks on one of the tables getting them ready to cook as the rest of the girls help get other foods ready. Dutch snorted again and went to help Boris light the fire.
A while later Dutch, Boris and Biu sat on the logs around the fire as steaks slowly simmered, along with sweet corn and several pots holding everything from crabs to shrimp.
Shenhua, Sawyer and Rotton played with the volleyball while Balalaika and Chang sat in beach chairs drinking and talking quietly.
Dutch looked towards the surf where Eda, Rock and Revy were wading. To be honest it looked more like Rock was being dragged by the two girls into the water instead of going willingly.
They pulled him back and forth until Eda cried out, "Hey Revy! He's got a tent! What the hell are we going to do about that now?" Eda began to hug Rock from behind as Revy grabbed her shouting, "Back off Bitch!" As the two women began to splash water on each other, Rock slowly slid down in the water until only his red faced head was showing.
Boris chuckled as he watched the three splashing in the surf. "It's a wonder those two women don't really get into a fight over Rock some days," Boris committed.
Dutch nodded and said, "Well I've been thinking about it." He sipped his beer and continued, "Eda never really pushes Revy over the line. It's almost like she would not mind a tussle with Rock, but there seems to be a line she doesn't cross. Now Revy? She beats on Rock so much you would think they were married. He fusses at her, but is always there when she needs something and always makes sure she gets home at night when they are out drinking together. To be honest, I worry about the day they stop fighting. I'll know then that somehow, the line has been crossed."
The other two men nodded as they watched Rock run up the beach with the two bikini clad bombshells chasing him.
Dutch looked around and asked, "Uh, did anyone see where Benny went?"
Biu nodded, "He and Jane slipped off into the trees about a half hour ago. I guess about now they are getting their 'pipes' cleaned." He said with a snicker.
Dutch and Boris chuckled and Dutch said, "Well one thing about it is Benny sure has cut down on watching internet porn since he and Jane got together!"
Biu shook his head and said, "Holy fuck, if she was mine I don't think I could ever climb out of bed with her!"
They all laughed as the two hackers walked out of the trees holding hands. Benny had a grin on his face and Jane looked a little mussed up, but had a cat that ate the bird satisfied look on her face.
Dutch looked at the trio trying to play volleyball and asked, "What's the deal with those three? I know who Sawyer and Shenhua are, but have never seen either of them act the way they have since pretty boy showed up in town."
Biu shrugged and said, "Well great brother Chang questioned Shenhua about it and she said there is a lot more to Sawyer then anybody knew. Rotton, on the other hand in her words, 'He too dumb be good killer! He too pretty! Needs to be pimp or whoreboy not shooter! Need someone to take care of him all time! But he keep Sawyer happy.'"
Boris and Dutch laughed and Boris said, "Da! That sound just like her! Huh, makes you wonder, did she take him on to raise, or keeping him around as a trophy fuck?"
"I don't think either really, but they all do spend a lot of time together. Chang is pays Rotton to play lookout and back up the girls when they are working, and so far he has done a good job at that," Biu said.
Dutch reached out and poked a steak with a long cooking fork and watched some juice drizzle out of it. "I think those are just about ready." he said as he stood up. Waving his arm he called out, "Foods on y'all come and get it!" and started banging a pot lid with the fork.
"Through the mirror of my mind, Time after time, I see reflections of you and me! Reflections of, the way life used to be! Reflections of, the love you took from me!"
"Ah" Dutch thought, "Now there was a woman that could sing." He didn't know who had picked the music, but so far he had not heard a single song from the boom box that he didn't like. Many of which brought back memories of riding riverboats up and down the Me Cong years ago.
Balalaika walked over and picked up stick with hot coals on the end to light her cigar. After a couple of puffs she looked down and smiled, "Having a good time Dutch?"
Dutch looked up at her from where he sat in the sand and nodded. "Yeah Big Sis, I think I am having a good time. When are we starting back though?"
She shook her head, "No hurry Dutchy, tomorrow sometime will be fine if it is ok with you."
Dutch shook his head, "No, I got nowhere to be. I will need to go check the lines on the boat and make sure they are loose enough for the tide."
She nodded, "Do that and then chill out for the rest of the night. Hey great brother Chang, feel like taking a walk and working off some of that food?"
"Sure!" Chang said as he walked over.
Balalaika shook her head as Boris and Biu started to get up, "Down boys, its ok, we can handle a walk on deserted island by ourselves."
Chang winked at Dutch as Boris and Biu looked at each other and settled back down.
The pair strolled off down the beach and Dutch looked at the two men beside him, as they watched their bosses, the two most powerful people in Roanapur, stroll away. Dutch took a sip of beer before cocking an eye at Boris, "Ok, spill it, Boris, did I just see what I think I saw?"
Boris hung his head and said, "Da Dutch, it's been going on for a little while now."
Biu sighed and said, "Ya they been quiet about it, but Boris, I and now you, know Dutch."
Dutch whistled and shook his head, "Son-of-a-bitch, while I always though there was a chemistry between those two, I never thought of anything like this!"
Both gangsters nodded.
Boris said, "Well they are sneaky about it at first, thinking Biu and I don't know when they were slipping around, but we are always somewhere watching their backs."
Biu nodded, "the hard thing is they play pranks on each other, and we have to act like we don't know what's going on."
"Pranks?" Dutch said asked, "What kind of pranks?"
Biu snickered and said, "Well, a while back after a 'private' visit, Chang wrote 'Chang's Bitch' on her ass in permanent marker."
Dutch set up and stared at Biu, "He did fucking WHAT!"
Boris was laughing, "Da Dutch! Damn it was hard not to get shot that day! Shit she was pissed! We had a real meeting the next day and she gave him a package."
Biu cackled as he said, "I'm not supposed to know, but it was a pregnancy test that showed positive. Chang freaked for a full day and drank himself unconscious before Boris showed up with another one showing negative."
"Oh no she fucking didn't!" Dutch laughed as Boris nodded laughing.
"Oh da," he said. "I don't know how she pulled that off but Biu and I almost busted gut next time there was a meeting." He shook his head, "They are like a couple of kids sometime!"
Dutch laughed as he got up, "Well I'm going to check the boat, I'll be right back," as he walked to the dock. His tour only took a minute and as he sat back down on the log as Boris handed him a fresh beer.
"Hey Dutch," Boris said, "Look at that!" Boris pointed out to sea, as the sun set into the western water. The silhouette of the Thai corvette slid across the sun in silence, as the air shimmered with the last heat of the day.
Biu whistled as Dutch said, "Wow, that's one reason I became a sailor boys."
"Speaking of that," Boris asked. "Where did you get an old pt boat like that? I thought they were all burned after the war?"
Dutch shook his head, "No only about 120 or so were burned, most of the others were sold and rebuilt for different purposes. Many were made into fishing boats, cabin cruisers, hell Clark Gable the actor even had one rebuilt as a yacht by Elco! He loved the thing, but never had much time to use it. Elco stored it for many years and only sold it a few years ago. They got a right pretty price for it too with it being connected to Gable."
The man took a sip of beer and looked out at his pride and joy. "I was in the Philippines doing some work after Nam and happened up on an old guy at a boatyard in the back of nowhere that had three pulled up on land. He said his great grand daddy fixed PT's for John Buckley's unit before the islands fell to the Japanese. After the war his granddad and great granddad bought six of them to convert into fishing boats. They converted three over the years, but when fiberglass hulls got so popular, no one wanted the wooden hulls anymore. They had been sitting there ever since, but he just couldn't bring himself to scrap them. He told me a ton of stories his great granddad told him about Buckley's squadron fighting jap cruisers and destroyers off the islands, and then limping in to get patched up just to go out and do it again. I had made a nice sum in an investment I had been working at, so I hired on with the fellow for a while in exchange for help fixing up one of the boats. I picked the best hull and gutted her, rebuilding the cabins as I went to the style I wanted. New controls, new modern engines, jet drives from PRB's so I can go into shallower water and get more power out of her when I needed it. I armored the deck and deck houses under the wood planking so I could keep the old look to her but keep the people below safe."
"Wow," Boris said, "she sure is a nice boat for all that. What happened to the others?"
Dutch bowed his head for a minute and said, "Old man died right about time we got finished with her. He didn't have any family and old bastard left me the boat yard in his will. I gave it to his workers so they could keep their jobs and when I left, I towed the other two hulls out to sea and burned them. There was not really much left after I got through stripping them. I felt it was better for them to go out that way, instead of just rotting away under the trees. They're out there under the Philippine Sea, with their sisters and the men who sailed them." As he raised his beer can in silent salute to the fallen, Boris and Biu joined him.
Dutch threw another couple of logs on the fire and looked around. With Balalaika and Chang out walking, the younger ones had settled down around a table drinking and playing cards. Jane was talking to Shenhua and Sawyer as Benny dealt cards to Rotton and Rock, who was surrounded by Revy and Eda. As he sat back down, he nodded toward the youngsters and asked Boris, "I thought Jane was scared to death of those two?"
Boris nodded and said, "She was, but it was explained to her they were not trying to kill her, just catch her. She had never been exposed to a place like Roanapur before, so she got pretty freaked, until she and Benny got together that is."
"Yeah Revy and Eda took out quite a few of the worthless deadbeat shooters in Roanapur that night. Culled the crop you could say," Dutch said.
Boris and Biu both nodded, "Ya," Biu said. "We had really started getting some stupid freaky ones then like that crazy with the torch." Boris shivered with the thought, "Damn I'm glad Two-Hands put paid on his ass, that one gave me flashbacks."
Dutch wondered about that as he thought about the burn scars Balalaika carried on her body but didn't ask anything further.
Eda got up from the table bringing a bottle of bourbon with her, as Revy cursed her and flipped her off. She strolled over and flopped down in front of the log Dutch was sitting on and leaned against his legs. "Hey Dutch! How you doing?" she asked as she held out the bottle to him.
"I'm good Eda, How you?" he asked back as he took a drink and passed the bottle to Boris and Biu before giving it back to her.
"Me? I'm goooood Dutch!" she said as she laid her head back on the log, "I got a good buzz going and I'm full warm and toasty!" She raised her head and looked back toward the table and card players, "I got bored messing with Revy over Rock so I thought I would come see what y'all are up to. Y'all been sitting here all day drinking and laughing so I figured you must be having a good time."
The men nodded as she passed the bottle around again. "So Eda," Boris asked, "You got thing for Rock?"
She laughed and said, "Oh he's alright. He's cute and all and I wouldn't kick him out of bed if that's what he wanted, but I'm more messing with Revy than anything." She looked over the top of her shades at Dutch. "You know Dutch if she don't step up to the plate soon, I'm not so sure I might not trip Rock up just for the hell of it, though Revy would probably empty a couple of mags into me if I did. Damn that girl needs to wake up!"
"Something going on there?" Dutch asked.
Eda shook her head, "I don't know Dutch, they act like an old married couple, but if you ask either one of them about it they hem and hedge and dodge the subject. There is a lot of tension there, but neither one wants to be the first one to make a move. If that epic fuck ever happens I bet your gonna be able to hear the two of them screaming all over Roanapur."
Dutch shivered at the thought as he watched the interaction between his two crew members.
Balalaika walked up out of the darkness with a handful of Cuban cigars. She held them out for the four to take and said, "Well, I hope everyone has been having a great time! I know I have!" She bent over and picked up a burning stick to light her smoke with as she turned and walked back to the beach chairs where Chang was just settling in.
Dutch leaned forward and look over the top of his shades as he noticed some Chinese writing on Balalaika's butt. He looked at Biu and asked, "Did you see that? What did that say?"
Biu had a stunned look on his face and said "It says 'Chang was here'." They all looked at Boris who was sitting at attention.
Dutch grinned slightly and said, "Boris?"
Boris glanced at them and cried out in his best German voice, "I know NOTHINK! I saw NOTHINK!"
"OH I KNOW YOU DIDN'T!" Dutch cried out as he laughed so hard he fell off the log backward.
Biu sat with a puzzled look on his face as Eda helped Dutch up, almost falling all over him herself laughing so hard. They sat back down and told Biu about the American TV show since he had never heard of this Colonel Hogan and his hero's.
Dutch watched the moon rise as they laughed, talked and drank late into the night.
"Put you head on my shoulder!" crooned the Lettermen, as Dutch opened his eyes with the dawn light. He raised his head from his chest and looked around from where he had been sleeping sitting up in front of the log. Eda was curled up off to his left with her back against Biu who had one arm around her and one of his hands holding onto one of her tits. On the right Boris was stretched out between his log and the fire snoring softly. As Dutch got up and walked over to the cooler for a beer, he saw Rotton laid out on a beach blanket with Shenhua curled up next to him. Sawyer, on the other hand, was face up draped across both their bodies with a smile on her face. Chang and Balalaika were snoozing in their beach chairs holding hands down low where they thought they could not be seen. Benny and Jane were not in sight but Dutch figured they were on the boat. As he bent over and got a cold beer he noticed out of the corner of his eye Rock and Revy sitting off to one side in a beach chair. Dutch stood up and turned his back to them as he thought, Ohhh, I so hope I didn't see what I thought I saw. He tilted his head around again and looked a second time. Yes, Revy was lying beside Rock, half on his chest nuzzling his neck while slowly rubbing his stomach. Rock slept peacefully with a smile on his face, and an arm around Revy's shoulders. Dutch shook his head, opened his beer, and took several big gulps.
Ding! Ding! Squawk! The loudspeaker on the PT boat sprung to life, breaking the silence of the morning.
"Black Lagoon, Black Lagoon, this is HTMS Tapi calling, how do you read over... Black Lagoon, Black Lagoon, this is HTMS Tapi calling, do you read me over?"
Before Dutch could start toward the boat Benny replied to the summons, "Uh…Ah… yeah…Tapi, Tapi, this is Black Lagoon, we read you 5 by 5 over."
"Lagoon be aware we are departing area for rescue of fishing vessel. Repeat, departing area for rescue of fishing vessel in distress, over."
"Rodger Tapi, Rodger Tapi, you are leaving area on rescue mission. Good hunting over."
"Thank you Lagoon, have a safe trip home, Tapi over and out."
"Rodger Tapi, Black Lagoon over and out!" Benny climbed up the forward gun turret and waved at Dutch, "Hey Dutch! Did you hear all that?"
Dutch waved back and called out, "Yeah get prestart going, we'll be leaving soon!" Benny waved again and disappeared below. Dutch turned back to the rest and called out, "Ok everyone! Up and at em! Pack it, stack it and police the area, time to head back!"
There were several groans, but not as many as he thought there would be as everyone began to get up and stretch. Balalaika smirked as she watched Dutch get everyone into gear and organized.
"Aye, Aye, Big Daddy!" she said as she stood at attention saluting, with her chest stuck out. She paused and cocked her head as she looked to her left. Dutch followed her gaze to where Rock and Revy sat very closely next to each other sharing a cigarette.
She looked back at Dutch with a question on her face but Dutch shook his head and said, "I know NOTHINK! I saw NOTHINK!" Balalaika cackled with laughter and slapped Dutch on the shoulder.
Balalaika then turned, grabbed Chang's foot and began to drag his still sleeping body off the chair. "Get up you lazy slug! Help get ready to go!"
"Hey! Hey! I'm awake!" he cried out as his ass hit the sand. He sat up rubbing his head as he looked around, "Why's everyone in such a big hurry all a sudden?" he asked.
Dutch and Balalaika laughed as they helped him to his feet. "Our watchdog had to run so it's time to go," Balalaika told him. Chang grunted and muttered something about first things first and stumbled toward the trees. Dutch looked down at Balalaika as she smirked while watching Chang stumble away.
"This gonna be ok?" Dutch asked.
She leaned back on Dutch with her head on his shoulder and nodded, "yeah my Dutchy, it going to be ok. He's a good guy and I'm surprised we hid it as long as we did."
Dutch nodded, "Good, most everyone needs someone somewhere sometime."
She looked up at him and brushed some sand off his flak jacket. "And what about you Dutchy?" she asked quietly. "Who is there for you?"
Dutch smiled and said, "You know what they say about captains and their ships Big Sis, there is a love there that no woman can replace."
She smiled again said, "Give me a fast ship, for I intend to go in harm's way." She reached up kissed him on the cheek and patted him on the chest. "Get the children rolling Dutch," she said as she started after Chang.
"Goodnight, sweetheart, well, it's time to go, duh da duh duh duh, Goodnight, sweetheart, well, it's time to go,"
I want to know who the hell made this music disk. Dutch thought as the Spaniels doo wopped the song. Packing had not taken long since, Balalaika told him most of the hard goods were going to be stored under the hut in the crates to be used another time, with a note written on the outside about being property of Hotel Moscow and the Triad. Dutch checked the beach and made sure everyone was aboard before stepping off the dock himself. Revy and Eda were sitting on the deck house whispering with Revy blushing. Dutch shook his head again as he went to the bridge thinking again, I do not want to know!
"All shipshape Benny?" Dutch asked over the headset.
"Everything ready to go Dutch!" Benny replied.
Dutch reached and flipped the starter switches for the 1500 horsepower engines. As they roared to life, Rock and the others cast off the lines and jumped aboard.
Revy came onto the bridge and leaned over his shoulder. "Hey big daddy," she said as Dutch nodded to her.
"You have a good time Revy?" he asked, almost not wanting to know the answer.
Revy blushed and said, "Yeah boss I had a great time."
Boris and Biu came onto the bridge and took up stations on either side of Dutch's chair again.
Boris said, "Dutch? The Kaptain said once you get clear of the island…let's see how she put it...Tell Dutch to show me what his girl has got."
Dutch smiled and nodded as Balalaika walked into view on the foredeck, still in her swimsuit.
Revy leaned forward and said, "What the hell is that on her ass?"
The men were quiet as Revy climbed out on deck.
Dutch began to push the throttles forward as Revy and Eda walked up to Balalaika and bent over to look at the writing on her butt. Balalaika turned beet red and spun around hollering, "CHANG YOU AS…."
She was drowned out by the sound of the pt boats horns as Dutch pushed the buttons. The three men broke out laughing as she charged aft looking for Great Brother Chang.
Dutch called out on the loudspeaker, "All hands, prepare for attack speed! Benny! Give me a tune!"
The Black Lagoon thundered away to the sound of BTO, "And I'll be...Taking care of business every day! Taking care of business every way! I've been taking care of business, it's all mine! Taking care of business and working overtime! Work out! "
In their wake, silence returned again to the little island.
Author's Notes: This is my first try at doing something like this. I watch this anima several years ago and just rewatched it and it set me on fire all over again. After seeing the swim suit issue, and reading all the manga and fanfic stories, this story jumped in my head and I had to get it out. I hope everyone enjoys it and please post a review.
Update: 10/18/13. My writing style has much changed since I first wrote Beach Blanket Bingo. After rereading it I felt I wanted to do it better justice and updated.
If you like it please Review and Favorite! Also give my other stories a try.
Music: Martha & the Vandellas - Heat Wave
Diana Ross & the Supremes – Reflections
The Lettermen - Put Your Head on My Shoulder
The Spaniels - Goodnight, Well It's Time To Go
BTO - Takin' Care of Business