„Come in!" bellowed a very on edge Dr. Bashir through the closed door.
A little irritated, Garak stepped into the Room.
Dr. Bashir was bending over the Replicator and furiously hit the control panels.
He didn't even turn around as Garak entered his Quarters.
As Garak advanced further into the room, he noticed all kinds of vegetables lying on the living room table.
Celery, carrots, corncobs, courgettes, asparagus', Mazaa stalks and some oddly shaped potatoes he recalled as originating from Trill.
Even more irritated he turned away from the table and asked in his polite Cardassian way: „You wanted to see me Doctor?"
„Yes! This damn Replicator is malfunctioning!Everytime I order something it produces some kind of vegetable, though all I want is a plain, simple glass of water!"
He then continued hitting the control panels.
„But my dear Doctor", Garak smiled behind Bashir's back, watching his backside with some pleasure, „ surely I'm not an engineer who could fix this problem in a matter of minutes. I'm just a plain, simple tailor, just like your glass of water."
Finally Bashir turned around and looked very annoyed at Garak, who hastily had to step back.
„Which I cannot get! And by the way, I already asked for someone to come down here and have a look at it, but O'Brien is needing all men to fix Upper-Pylon-3, into which a Ferengi Trading Vessel crashed this very morning!"
„Ah yes," Garak interrupted, „I've heard of it. Rumor has it, the Captain received oo-mox while trying to dock to the station."
For a short moment Bashir was irritated, first because he had to recall what oo-mox meant, and then because of Garak bringing this up.
Trying to regain his anger and suppressing a blush, he snapped at Garak: „And please spare me your ,plain, simple Garak' talk! I very well know your technical skills and besides, this is Cardassian technology."
Garak's smile grew even wider. „Now you caught me. Actually I once worked as a Replicator Scientist on..."
„Please, just take a look at the damn thing!"
„If you wish so." Garak casually leaned forward, tapped a few panels, leaned back and encouraged Bashir to order another glass of water.
A cucumber appeared.
„Garak! This is not funny!"
„On the contrary doctor. I find it quite entertaining!"
„Alright!" Bashir exclaimed by throwing himself on the couch behind all the vegetables, „If you don't want to help me, that's fine with me! I can still go to the Replimat."
Garak knew he had gone too far.
He picked up the Cucumber and carefully sat down next to the pouting Doctor.
„In fact, the language files of your Replicator are corrupted. It tries to interpret your ,glass of water' in Cardassian language, which sounds like a word for a kind of Cardassian vegetable, similar shaped as those: K'liss owa'ka." pointing with the cucumber to the other vegetables.
Bashir sighed and leaned forward to pick up a carrot. Turning it around in his hands he asked: „ Great, and what should I do with all these vegetables?"
Garak couldn't help but to smile again.
„As I was saying. I once was a Replicator Scientist, but I gave it up in favour of becoming a cook." Bashir turned to him and raised an eyebrow in well justified disbelief.
„No really, Doctor! How about I cook nice vegetable stew for the two of us in my Quarters? We can also replicate as much water as you like there."
Thinking about the offer it lifted Bashir's mood a little and even produced a smile on his face. „You know what, a good wine would be more appropriate I think."
Joyously Garak placed his Hand on Bashir's Shoulder. „That's the spirit!" and stroking the Cucumber in his lap, he dreamily added: „I think I even have a great idea for desert!"