Re-redone! This will not remain a oneshot!
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans; they are property of DC comics and Warner Bros.
It was a warm afternoon in Jump City, like any other bright summer day. The birds chirped, the park was filled, and best of all, not a criminal in sight. The citizens of Jump ran about their day to day lives, enjoy the lack of any supervillian related surprises. As for the residential heroes, the Teen Titans, each Titan was taking advantage of every second… well, almost everyone. We find four of our heroes in the common room.
Cyborg was on the couch, face intently focused on the giant screen in front of him. He was playing the newest release of Mega Monkeys: Attack of the Super Ninjas. "Awe yea! You're going down super ninjas!" The TV hummed the solidifying beep of victory with the last of his cybernetic button mashing. "BOOYAH! High score!"
Robin and Starfire were sitting at the table talking, as they always enjoyed doing in each outher's company.
"But Robin, if your people do not enjoy the feeling fear, then why do they make so many of the horror movies?" She looked to her boyfriend, eager for his response. If there was one thing she loved more than her home world of Tamaran, it was learn about her long new-found home of earth. They had watched such a film before, but it had been well over a few years since the Wicked Scary incident.
"Honestly, Star, I don't know." The young man replied thoughtfully. "I think it's because part of us likes the adrenaline that fear can bring, or the notion of overcoming it. Everyone has a different reason for it, though I think the reasons they exist is cause they make a lot of money off of scarying people."
After Tokyo, the two Titans were inseparable, and they probably would be for the rest of their lives. They were still the same as they ever were, mind you. Robin was still broody as ever and Starfire the ever cheerful one. But when they were together, sparks flew more than when Cyborg was malfunctioning.
Now as for Raven, she stuck to her every day routine, sitting quietly on the couch reading, with a soothing glass of herbal tea to top it off. Years of constant meditation and patience have allowed her to achieve an inate ability to block out the world around her and focus on her beloved books. Well, block out within reason, there was always a few bugs, especially a green one that tended to get in the way, but today she was at peace enjoying the void of another world within pages. The euphoria of a good book brought her a feeling of a zen-like state.
All in all, it was starting off as a nice day. Now the only thing missing from the picture was-
"Has anyone seen BB?" Cyborg asked, announcing what everyone had started to wonder in the back of their minds. It wasn't unusual for the young shape-shifter to be absent. His ability to sleep in was practically legend.
"I haven't seen him since yesterday," Robin replied, "How about you Star?"
"I am afraid I have not seen friend Beast Boy either… perhaps you have, friend Raven?" Starfire inquired.
"He's probably sleeping the day off as usual." Raven replied in her monotonic voice, taking another sip from her mug. She was just as curious as the others, but she waved it off, assuring that he was merely sleeping later than usual. 'He probably was up all night playing some childish game,' She thought to herself turning the page.
"It's late, even for Beast Boy." The leader pondered glancing at the clock: 3 o' clock. 'What is he doing' he thought to himself.
Time seemed almost to drudge on for the duration of their realization, another hour passed with no sign of their youngest member. Though no one said much in regard to it, each keeping their mind at the task at hand. But with every minute passing, the thought became a persistent reminder in each of their heads, until finally they couldn't stand it any longer.
'How can he be so annoying even when he's not around?' the empath sat there trying her hardest to read in the relative peace but found herself rereading the same sentence over and over in the last 10 minutes. She could sense the others emotions and their concern growing for the changeling. The more Raven attempted the block it out, the more she began to feel the same as the others.
"Alright, I don't know about y'all but I'm starting to wonder where the little grass stain is." Cyborg sighed, putting down his controller. He looked over his shoulder, his right arm draping on the back of the couch.
"Agreed, friend Cyborg. We should do the looking for him!" Starfire stood up from her seat, when a familiar green gloved held her wrist. She looked down to see Robin looking up at her.
"Easy Star, I don't think we all need to rush his room just yet." Robin tried to coax the young princess from leaping down the hall draggin him with her. "One of us should go though. So who's going to do it? Cyborg?"
"Have you been in the grass stain's room recently?! I think something moved in there last time I walked by!" The look on Cyborg's face was of mock horror. "If you have any shred of decency, Rob, you won't send another living being in there! Just give him a call on his communicator."
Robin gritted his teeth, irritation starting to spread on his face. He pinched the bridge of his nose, eyes closed. "I just did, he's not responding."
"I'll do it," Raven offered, much to everyone's amazement.
"Are you sure?" Robin asked.
Raven closed her book, moving to stand up. "I'd rather go throw him out the window then hear you two bicker about who should go fetch him." She felt the vein in her head pulse slightly. It was true she was willing if only stop the impending quarrel, but a small part of her was curious about his whereabouts, or rather lack thereof.
"Well if you've got him covered, then I'm gonna go wax my baby." Cyborg walked off, slightly relieved at the resolution, but was in need of something to keep him busy. He loved the little guy like he was his own flesh and blood, but his room was a monster in it of itself. The Stankballs came from his "clean pile" in the closet! Who knew what else was in there?
"Well thanks for doing it, Raven. I might as well do something productive. If you need me, you know where to look." Robin announced, leaving to his usual spot, the evidence room.
"And I shall make sure that he is not doing the overworking." Starfire cheerfully piped, following her boyfriend to his destination.
With everyone gone and out of the way, Raven slowly walked to the window and prepared herself for a quick meditation. If she was going to deal with a pest, she might as well mentally prepare for it. Sitting, now floating in the lotus position, she began to chant her mantra. "Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos…"
How long had it been now? Ten years. Ten years since his troubles began. Ten years since everything changed. Ten years of guilt, anguish, fear, loneliness.
Beast Boy got up from his place on the floor and started his venture to the top bunk, sitting on the edge, letting his legs dangle off the bunk. He stared at them with no real interest. The young shape shifter felt tired, but sleep had escaped him. The nightmares came again last night, it always happened around this time, but these were far worse. They felt real, like he was reliving the same day all those years ago. His stomach grumbled in hunger, but he couldn't eat. He needed some fresh air, but if he tried to leave the others would stop him, and just bombard him with questions.
The first person he figured would try and get answers out of him was Cyborg, his best friend. Cyborg and he had a bond with each other unlike any other, to them, they were more than friends. They were brothers. The two played, fought, and argued like brothers would. Their meat-tofu debate was a tradition to them, they loved the challenge. Both would talk about things with each other, anything and everything, really. They shared some of their pasts, but never to the full extent. Cyborg probably knew what the situation was, but he didn't know the whole story.
The next one he expected was Robin, their fearless leader, and 2nd broodiest man alive, next to Batman. He always looked up to Robin, someone who always tried to do the right thing at any cost to himself. Granted, he did tend to obsess over things, especially a certain orange-masked figure, but who didn't have their flaws? Despite any mistake he ever made, he always learned from them and grew as a leader. He cared for every member of his team and would do whatever it took to do what he could. 'Like the most over-protective older brother you ever had.' Beast Boy smiled weakly at the thought.
Starfire would be next, if anyone. She was his good friend. 'She laughs at my jokes, at least,' that was true, she was the only one to show interest in his jokes, even if she herself didn't understand them. 'She's kind of like a big sister,' she was always so cheerful. She never liked seeing the others upset, and she's usually the one who tries to cheer them up.
And the least expected member to intrude on Beast Boy's list was Raven. Now it wasn't that he disliked her or didn't want to talk to her, it was the exact opposite actually. He had liked her from the beginning, he wanted to be her friend, and always tried to be. She was the first person to think he was funny, until he screwed it up anyway. It just seemed like she didn't want him around. Seeing her sitting alone would sometimes remind him of how lonely he once felt as a child, and he never wanted anyone to ever feel that way if he could help it. He may have had more reasons to pester than he realized, but he was too distracted to think about it.
Raven slowly trudged down the halls, impassively noting the gray that covered the walls and floor as she made her approach to the changeling's room. "Robin owes me big time for this." She grumbled, noting the turns needed to locate his room.
As she rounded the next corner, she was hit with waves of emotion that almost knocked her back they were so strong! It physically and mentally brought her own mood down. Wave after wave she made out the feelings: Sadness, lonliness, anger, and self-loathing. After a moment of processing, she started to sense the familiarity behind the emotions. "Beast Boy?"
Her slow pace for earlier jumped into a quick stride as she made her way to his door.
Beast Boy groaned from all of his thoughts swirling in his head. 'Man do I have a head ache' he thought to himself, only to make it worse by thinking about it. Luckily, he was shut out of his thoughts by a knock on the door. Doing his best to put on his jokester face, he answered the door. To his surprise, it wasn't Robin or Cyborg as he first guessed, or even Starfire, but Raven at his door. "Raven?" he asked, "What are you doing here?"
"I came to make sure you were still alive," Raven replied in her usual deadpan monotone. Had it been anyone else at the door, his face would've fooled anyone. It held what seemed like utter joy, but his opposing emotions still radiated off of him like a living breathing entity. "Beast Boy, are you alright?"
"Yea Rae, cool as a cucumber," he pulled off his best beaming smile he could muster, faking every ounce of it.
"Beast Boy, you know I'm an empath, right? I can sense your emotions. Can I... come in?" she stuttered. 'What's with me? I don't stutter.' She mentally passed it off as his overbearing emotions preventing her train of thought.
Beast Boy sighed, he knew he couldn't lie to Raven and get away with it. Maybe the others, but then again, this was Raven. "Sure, come on." He answered walking back into his room with her in suit. He plopped on his bottom bunk, staring at the top one.
While Beast Boy took his seat, Raven inspected his room. The green walls were full of old movie posters and a dartboard on the farthest wall (she took note of Adonis's picture on it, one dart stuck to his head). It was as messy as ever, clothes scattered on the floor, comic books and video games strewn by his closest, and papers completely covering his desk and even his laptop was lost in the sea of papers... But it didn't smell, much to her surprise. She took a seat at his desk chair. "So…" she began.
"I don't want to talk about it." Beast Boy replied, looking away from her.
"Beast Boy, you can't keep it bottled up. Tell me what's bothering you." Raven replied shortly, already starting to get annoyed at the changeling.
"I don't have to do anything, you can't make me." The changeling retorted, folding his arms and rolling away from her view.
"Either you tell me what's going on in that little head of yours, or I'm going in, got it?" Raven was quickly losing her patience.
"Why should I?" he shot back, finally moving back to look her in the eye. "You bottle everything up all the time! I try to get you to open up, but all you ever do is shut me out! I don't have to say anything just because you or anyone else wants me to!" He sat there, staring into her amethyst eyes, waiting for her to retort.
Raven bit her lower lip. His emerald eyes were pouring into her soul searching for an answer. He was right; she never told him anything, or any of the Titans for that matter. Granted it was to keep her overlord demon father from ruling the world, but that only made things worse. "I don't like talking about my past," she admitted quietly, ending the uncomfortable silence.
"And you think I do!" he yelled angrily, growling out of pure instinct, enhanced by his abilities. Raven was shocked to say the least; this was a side of him no one had ever seen from the usually comical shape shifter.
However, his anger soon passed, and all he could do was bow his head in shame. He brought his hands to his face. "I'm sorry, Rae, it's just… hard, ya know?"
She nodded in understanding, moving to sit by him on the bunk and look her green friend in the eye. "Beast Boy, I have no right to ask, but I'm here to listen. Now please tell me."
Beast Boy stared back at her for what felt like an eternity. 'Maybe it'll help' he thought. He sighed, gathering his thoughts. "Okay, but it's a long story, so take any bathroom breaks beforehand," he made a weak attempt at a smile, and thought there may have been a flash of one on her face. "Anyway, it begins in Africa; my parents were scientists, working on the genetics of animals, trying to find a link between animals and humans. I was born there in Africa, living close by a tribe where my parents' close friend, King Tawaba, the leader of the tribe we were close by, lived. I was happy, living an adventurous life. I was six years old when things started to change…"
"One day, I was playing in a field, when out of the trees came a green monkey. You see, there's a disease in Africa called Sakutia, that only animals can survive, but it makes them turn green. I, being the curious kid I was, tried to pet the monkey… And the green monkey bit me and left after I finally managed to shake him off. After that, my mom found me and knew what happened after seeing the green monkey take off in the trees. My mom started crying, I didn't know why at the time, but she just held me there and sobbed."
"I started to get sick, I was… dying. The disease was slowly killing me; most people lasted about 2 weeks, adults anyway. My parents worked day and night searching for a cure. They looked like they had been through Hell and back. "
"After about a week of all-nighters and sweating inside my own skin, they finally found the cure. They cured me all right, but the side effects left me as the little green dude you see today. Animal disease, animal side effects, or at least that's what makes the most sense. I adjusted to the change, my parents were just happy they still had their son, I owed them my life."
"About a week after I was cured, my mother was taking photographs of the rare flowers near our camp when she was attacked by a black mamba. I was right behind her when it happened. The first time I transformed, I honestly didn't think about it. Instinct took over to protect my mom. Next thing I know, I had turned into a mongoose and killed the black mamba, and apparently ate it; and so began the start of my vegetarian life."
Beast Boy stopped to shudder recalling that memory, causing Raven to smirk slightly at the thought, the irony of the situation. "So that's how I found out I had powers. King Tawaba thought it was a great gift that should be put to good use. I started trying these powers out, but I could only change into small animals."
Beast Boy stopped there, looking at Raven for the first time since he had been telling his story. He couldn't continue with it, the end was something he locked away in his mind long ago. But at the same time, he felt he had to continue, or this nightmare would haunt him for the rest of his life.
And more importantly, was whom he was telling this all to. The one person he's known to never judge someone on appearances and never form an opinion on someone she just met. He always wanted to be her best friend; though he would never tell her that. Cyborg was his brother, but Raven was different somehow…
"Beast Boy?" Raven asked, shaking him out of his thoughts and bringing him back to reality.
"Huh?"
"Are you alright?"She asked, concerned for the changeling.
"Oh, yeah sorry… where was I?"
"You finished talking about how you got your powers," Raven reminded him. During the time he paused his story, she spent feeling his emotions. She felt all of them swirled together, lost in confusion. 'What was he thinking about?'
"Right…" Beast Boy stopped; remembering what came next, caused his face to pale. He took a minute to collect himself. "Then today… ten years ago, I went on a boating trip with my parents to get some supplies up river. The waters were really high and a storm was coming, but we kept going, we needed the equipment. Then, the boat hit a rock underwater, causing the engine to fail… The waters were starting to flood; we were being carried down river. Then, up ahead we saw it… the waterfall. We were heading straight for it, and we had no way of escape."
Beast Boy paused again, he couldn't take it. The pain of his memories flooded his mind, intoxicating him with their bittersweet feelings, and it left him to the brink of his held back tears. He didn't want to relive this. It was a spectre in his dreams haunting him. An instant later his thoughts were interrupted by a sensation coming from his hand. He looked down and to his surprise, saw that Raven had placed her hand upon his. She gazed back at him as he looked up to meet her. Beast Boy knew she wasn't one for contact. This was Raven after al! Yet, feeling the warmth of her hand brought him the courage he needed to continue.
'It's now or never,' he thought.
Raven watched him intently as he struggled to find the words. She felt his every emotion: Confusion, sadness, anger, love… and guilt? 'What does he have to feel guilty about?' she thought to herself before she heard the sound of Beast Boy's voice continuing with his tale.
"It was then that my parents looked at me, with sad eyes, knowing what was going to happen. They were so brave, Rae." A single tear slipped past his barrier holding back the torrential downpour he had been preventing as best he could. "My father looked at me and said… 'Garfield, I need you to be brave. You're a big boy now, I need you to turn into a bird… and fly away from here as fast as you can. And whatever you do, don't look back.'
"… I wanted to argue, to tell him it wasn't over… but, I followed his orders. I turned into an eagle and… before I took off I heard my mother say, 'Goodbye Garfield,'… I flew as far as I could away from the boat, but I couldn't help but look back... as they… fell."
By the time Beast Boy finished his story, he was sobbing in his hands, recalling everything from his childhood vividly. The torture of his memories and backed up emotions exploded at that moment, leaving him completely vulnerable and exposing his inner turmoil. Raven sat there shocked, surprised at what she had heard. She never thought that he, of all people, would have such a tragic past, especially since he always seemed so light-hearted. 'How had he kept it all in for so long?' Raven was perplexed by the thought. Beast Boy always seemed to wear his heart on his sleeve, yet this came from somewhere so deep inside of himself that she had trouble proccessing it all. The comedian of the team was not what he had seemed to be after all these years.
At this point she wasn't sure what to say or do. Unable to think of anything else, Raven did the one thing she could think of… She pulled him into a hug. At first, Beast Boy stiffened at her touch, but soon was holding on to her for dear life, sobbing quietly on her shoulder. Raven did the best she could at comforting her friend, lightly stoking the back of his head to try and soothe him. She could ignore her no touching policy for this, he needed it. They stayed that way for what seemed like an eternity. His sobs slowly turned into sniffles, followed by soft hiccups.
"It was my fault, Rae… I could've done something," Beast Boy said glumly, finally ending the silence in between his sniffles.
It was then that Raven pulled him off her shoulder and looked him straight in the eye, giving him one of her best death glares. "Beast Boy, it wasn't your fault, you need to stop blaming yourself. There was nothing you could've done; that's why your father told you to leave. So you could live." Her glare faltered and she looked at him hoping he got the message she intended.
"But I could've-"
"No, like you said, you could only change into smaller animals; there was no way you could've saved them,"
"I was a coward Rae! I turned my back on them! I left them to die when they needed me the most! I FAILED!" By this time, Beast Boy was enraged, a low almost savage growl erupting from his throat, tears still ever trickling down his face.
Raven was surprised, something that wasn't easy to accomplish. The empath sensed all of his seething fury and frustration, entertwined with his self loathing. He wasn't mad at her at all, rather himself for what he believed he did wrong. She sat there, giving him time to calm down from his anger.
Once he was finished, he merely shook his head in shame, realizing his mistake. "I'm sorry, Rae."
"It's alright, Beast Boy."
"I just… wish they were here."
"We all want something in life, Beast Boy, but wishing won't change what happened. You have to accept the fact that they're gone..." she hated having to say those words to him. Still she pressed on. "But they will never be forgotten. Everything you do today honor's their memory. I'm sure they 'd be proud to see what you've grown up to be."
It was then Beast Boy met her gaze again, listening intently to every word. "You are never without family. We are always here. You have friends who care about you, and want to see the happy goofball they're used to," She put her hand on his shoulder comfortingly.
Beast Boy thought for a moment, taking in all of Raven's words and smiled, a genuine smile, at the dark empath. "Thanks, Rae," he pulled into another hug, which she accepted gladly.
"You're welcome, Beast Boy," Raven was glad to see his demeanor change and saw him to be much happier; she could see it in his eyes. The previous feelings from earlier had diminished greatly and were replaced with gratitude and happiness. The empath was lost for a moment, staring in to his emerald eyes as they sparkled in the new found joy. It made her feel… happy. "If you ever need to talk, you know where to find me," she had a hint of a blush finishing that sentence. She silently thanked Azar for the darkness of his room.
"I will… and call me Gar, if you want to that is," Beast Boy blushed, a little. "Well, Cyborg does when it's just me and him, kind of a brotherly thing… Not that you're my brother! That'd be weird, right? W-what I mean is, uh..." Beast Boy paused, unsure what to say next. He looked away, flustered by his own wording.
Raven simply looked at him, a shadow of a smile appeared just as quickly as it vanished. "Alright, Gar, but don't expect me to say it all around the place," Raven gave him a look.
Beast Boy smiled, overjoyed at their newfound closeness, "Wouldn't have it any other way, Rae. Well, come on, tonight's my turn to make dinner. AND it's also my comedy night!"
Raven smirked, "We all know how much everyone would miss that," Raven replied sarcastically, but playfully.
"See, I told you I'm funny," Beast Boy waggled his eyebrows at her and got up from his bed, "Race you to the common room!" And he took off at cheetah speed before she could even so much as stand up.
At that moment, Raven did something she rarely did, she smiled. 'Good to have him back,' she thought. And with a smirk, she teleported to the common room, just in time to beat Beast Boy there.
"NO FAIR!"
Okay, so I know this story/oneshot whatever you call is like 8 years old, but I can't help it! I re-revised it yet again because I wrote this so long ago it needed an upgrade. I wanted so much more from this and I really do plan on seeing this though. if it takes my 10 more years I will finish this story! Thanks for all the patience and support!
Sincerely, DrGreatScott
the Author formerly known as Z1