Worried
You sit on the lounge in the small apartment you share with Frank. Lily is beside you, holding her stomach protectively, mirroring you and you're worried. You're worried for Lily, for James, for yourself and Frank and for everyone else you know. You're worried these babies, for her baby, for your baby, and you know you have every reason to be.
You feel your baby kick against your hand. You're so, so worried. All of the normal things, the normal worries of pregnancy- miscarriage and disability and babies without enough fingers, yes. But even more, you're worried about what will happen if the baby is fine. About what will happen when it leaves the protected space inside of you. What will happen when it's born into this world of blood, pain and war. Your worried it will be killed, worried about what it will have to see and live through if it's not.
You're scared because Franks an Auror and your both with the Order and it was so, so stupid to think you could have a baby and be a normal, happy family. You've put yourself and your baby right in the middle of this war, you've made yourself so many enemies, and this baby, your baby, and Lily's too, will inherit your enemies, your war, your stupidity.
On the coffee table is The Prophet, open to the many pages bearing the ever-growing list of families torn apart and lives ruined by this war. And you're so, so, so scared because that could so easily be you and Frank, or James and Lily. And these babies, yours and hers, could live, could survive this god-damned war but come out of the bloody thing without parents.
But Lily's there, and she has the same look on her face as you have on yours and you realise that there is only one way. Because the world is big and dark and scary and you could die any minute but you have to fight. Because if you don't, if you just hide away and let it all happen, it won't ever stop. You don't really have a choice. You have to keep going. You've chosen your path and you know it was the right one. You reach for Lily's hand and she clutches it tightly. There's no turning back now. You've just got to fight and pray and hope.