Star Wars belongs to George Lucas
He knew it was stupid. Clearly the falcon was damaged beyond repair. It was over. And yet he couldn't accept it. Technically, if he wanted he could fix it: he had the money. But buying a brand new ship, and upgrade it, would be cheaper. And it would take him months to get it fixed. It wouldn't even be the same ship anymore: between structural, hydraulic and electrical damages more than half of the Falcon was to be replaced in order to fly.
So putting it back in a fighting shape was just insane.
Yet he couldn't just dump it. Most of his adult life was somehow bound to the falcon. So many memories attached: his first kiss with Leia, teaching Anakin how to fix the hyperdrive, giving a 3 years old Jaina her first taste at piloting, his first Kessel run with Chewie… Losing it now felt like losing a part of him, again. And he had lost so much already. How many blows can one's heart support?
He used to think life was better if you didn't get attached to anything or anyone. Then nothing could hurt you. You were virtually invincible. But of course he HAD to make exception: Han Solo never respects a rule, even his own. So he started caring about Chewbacca and the falcon. And it was the beginning of the end. The wookie had the biggest heart on this side of the galaxy and slowly Han had let himself be convinced: caring, getting attached and loving people wasn't a bad thing. It was the greatest gift the universe had to offer. And for a while life had been good; sometime it had even been borderline perfect. But that kind of happiness didn't last and now it was time to pick up the check. First Chewie, then Anakin and now the falcon. Who was next? Jaina, Jacen, Ben, Luke… witch part of his soul was gonna be ripped apart? For how long would Leia be able to patch up the broken pieces of his heart? It wasn't as if the universe had left her unscathed. Far from it! It wasn't fair to burden her with another responsibility. She wasn't his keeper. Yet he solely counted on her to keep him afloat. And what did HE do for her these days? Absolutely nothing! She would be better off without him.
She would be better off without him.
As painful as this revelation was, it couldn't be ignored. Did he love her enough to do what was best for her? Did he have the strength to let his soulmate go?
"You weren't suppose to leave the medcenter" Damn the force. Of course she would join him NOW.
"Wasn't I?" He loved when she twisted her lips this way. It said 'I'm not in the mood for your bullshit Han Solo so stop this instant'
"Han…"she signed. Apparently she didn't want to fight with him right now
"I was just worry" Great! He couldn't do anything right
"I'm fine sweetheart. Just needed some air" and a bit of time to think.
"Do you want me to leave?"
"No" The answer was quick. No need to think, he didn't want to be away from her. That didn't mean he wouldn't have to though.
"Good, 'cause I 'm not leaving" She had some nerves. He would…
Hold her. Apparently. They didn't often display affection in public. Downside of being famous! But either she forgot it or she needed it badly. Who was he to refuse her that?
"I don't know what I would do without you" how could he have omit this detail? She loves him. She needs him. And here he was thinking about leaving her. He was the stupidest nerfherder ever.
"I'm not going anywhere" And to prove his point, he held her tighter.
Her head drop on his chest and they enjoy the moment. Just the two of them. The rest of the universe be damn.
But soon she remembers who she is and why it's not fitting to hug him in public. She steps back, but one of her hands remains on his hip.
"We should go back to the medcenter. Your last treatment is schedule in half an hour"
"Funny you mention it. I had every intention to break free" He smiled, because she was here, because no matter what she would always be here.
"Not happening flyboy…" Flyboy, it's been a while.
"Is that so?" Force, was there anything more entertaining than bickering with Leia?
"Well I do have this friend at Contruum shipyard whom, if I ask nicely, would be able to schedule an old piece of corellian jun…
"Careful princess. I happen to know exactly how much you love old corellian goods"
She laughed. And, hand in hand, they headed back to the medcenter.
He didn't know what would happen next, but he knew that with Leia at his side he could face anything.