Title: Cataclysm of Love

Genre: Romance/Humor

Rating: K+

Pairing: JuuHina, mentioned Suika

Summary: Suigetsu and Juugo have a chat about girlfriends and romance. NO YAOI! JuuHina(!) and mentioned Suika. Please R & R!

Juugo was sitting on a bench, feeding the birds, when Suigetsu walked up and sat down next to him. "Feedin' the birds again, Juugo? You really need a new hobby..." Suigetsu grunted. Juugo stuck his tongue out at the sharp-toothed boy and replied, "At least I'm not making a list that rates the curviness of a woman's ass!"

"DON'T MOCK MY IDEALS! Besides, I finished that list anyway, especially since my girlfriend doesn't let me check out other girls' asses but her own anymore..." Juugo gave Suigetsu a skeptical look and asked, "You...have a girlfriend? Seriously? When the hell did that happen?"

Suigetsu couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You really didn't know that me and Karin hooked up? Are you really that dense?" he asked, completely shocked that Juugo didn't know that yet. Even that stupid Iruka bastard knew about it, and he wasn't even important anymore!

Juugo just shrugged and went back to feeding his little birdie friends. After a few minutes of silence, Juugo finally spoke again, "So, do you treat her well? I think of her as my sister of sorts and if I find out you've been hurting her-" Juugo's calm speaking style hid the sinister malice in his words.

Suigetsu took a sip from one of his many water bottles and replied, "Don't worry, you idiot! I don't abuse her! If anything, I'M the one being abused! She's cute, but she can be a goddamn slave driver sometimes!" Juugo chuckled a bit as he pictured Suigetsu being bossed around by Karin all the time.

"What about you, Juugo? Have you found that special someone yet?" Suigetsu asked. Juugo seemed to have been lost in thought for a moment before shaking his head back and forth in response. In reality, Juugo DID have a girlfriend now, but he wanted to keep it a surprise for later.

Realizing he wasn't going to get anymore out of him, Suigetsu decided to leave. As he began to walk away, he turned to Juugo and called, "By the way, Juugo, don't forget about our meeting at the bar tonight! Be there or Sasuke will have your head!" Juugo nodded, showing he understood his orders.

Once Suigetsu was out of sight, one of the nearby bushes rustled a bit and a voice from within it whispered, "Is he gone, Juugo?" Juugo nodded and said, "He's gone..." Suddenly, none other than Hinata Hyuga popped out ofthe bush. As she brushed some stray leaves out of her hair, she said, "I thought he would NEVER leave! My panties were riding up..."

Juugo smiled and he kissed Hinata gently on the lips. "So," asked the Hyuga girl, "what should we do before meeting up with the others at the bar?" Juugo wrapped one of his long arms around Hinata's waist and replied, "I think I have an idea..."

"Hey, Sakura, I need to tell you something..."

"Naruto, if it's about what you found in your bellybutton again, then I don't-"

"It's different this time! I think Hinata might be suicidal or something!"

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, when I was walking by her house today, I think I heard her scream 'God, I'm coming' or something like that..."

"...Naruto, you are such a sick freak..."

"W-WHAT? WHAT DID I SAY?"

A/N: Hoho, it's JuuHina! I wonder what their babies would look like...

Ponders thoughtfully, but is then shot by hardcore NaruHina fans