DeiSaku: Trees, Tears and Tentacool
Deidara had learned early on that when in a relationship with Sakura, sometimes you just had to shut up, sit back and let her get on with it. This was definitely one of those times. He was cold, hungry, tired and stood in the middle of the woods at 3am. This was how people got murdered. And yet here he was, because as much as he refuted it, Hidan and Kisame were right when they joked that he was absolutely whipped. She used hypnosis, he was sure of it. There was no way one tiny woman should have this much power over him. Sighing, he tugged his black hoodie closer around him and burrowed further into the red scarf wrapped tightly around his neck. Now if only he could find his girlfriend.
For someone with bright pink hair, Sakura was notoriously good at disappearing without a trace.
She'd only been out of his sight for a few minutes, but when she didn't reply as he called her name he began to worry. After all, he rather liked her (ok, he loved her more than anything ever, but he wasn't ready to admit just how much he needed her) and, more importantly, she was Sasori's little sister. And Sasori would take great pleasure in slowly killing Deidara in the most torturous way possible.
Swallowing slightly, he called out to her again and listened intently for her reply, when suddenly a yell sounded out from somewhere on his left. A yell that was not at all comforting. Without a second thought, Deidara propelled himself over the dead leaves that littered the forest floor, wide eyes desperately searching for her bright colourings.
"Deidara, look, look!"
With a yelping noise that he would deny ever making, he spun to face his girlfriend who stood a few metres away, bundled up in his spare hoodie that draped over her thighs, a grin on her face and her phone clutched in her hand. She was fine, and he could afford to take a second to catch his breath after that near-heart attack. Then he would strangle her for making him shit himself like that.
"Sakura", he began slowly as he reached a stop in front of her, "what the fuck?"
She only grinned brighter, and turned her phone to face him.
"I got a Jynx!"
Deidara could only shut his eyes and contemplate how his life had led him to this moment. Really, what did he do to fall in love with such an absolute fucking idiot. Grabbing her hand, he began tugging the still-talking girl away in the direction that he really fucking hoped the car was in. He needed to be in his bed before they really did get murdered all because Sakura was obsessed with that goddamn Pokemon game.
"I'm going to name her after you, Dei, you guys have the same hair!"
He didn't reply, just continued gritting his teeth and picturing himself torturing Tobi so that he didn't sit on the ground and start bawling his eyes out over how the best thing in his life was sure to be the death of him.