Look at him. Falling in love. Treating her like she's the one and only love of his life. Acting like my existence is no longer accounted for. I sigh, sitting on someone's desk, staring at Eli intently. "Turn around!", my thoughts beg him. But I know he won't see me. No one can. No one can see the dead. If I could, I would make him see me. Fall in love with me again, not Clare. But I can't. I give him one last look and leave. I walk like a normal person down DeGrassi street, stopping at a memorial. I read it. "Please don't drink and drive, in memory of Julia Creed.". My thoughts flicker back to that night. I had gotten in a fight with Eli and in anger, got out of the car to get my bike when out of nowhere, a man, clearly drunk, swerved and his bumper collided with me full force. In a rush of honking horns, the man's apologies and people begging me to come to, I slipped away. When I could see again, I wasn't me…well I was but instead of being down there in my body, I was above me, looking down at men putting me in an ambulance. I was so confused, then I saw Eli. He had been crying. I rushed over to embrace him, but found myself unable to hug him. Every time I tried to hold him, I'd go through him. That night, everything changed. He transferred to Degrassi. He met Clare, fell in love, and broke up with her then fell in love with her all over again. As a 'ghost', or whatever you want to call it, I've learned that there's two emotions you still feel strongly. Love and pain. I feel love for him still, and pain because he doesn't love me anymore. When people imagine hell, they think of a burning place, hot and miserable. But for me, hell is watching the person you're in love with love someone else…and you can't do anything about it..