"Not everything is about you, Morty!"
The boy gave him a contemptuous look.
"Oh heeere we go again, if it's not about Rick then who-who cares right?! God of the fucking cosmos or whatever."
Rick plowed on, ignoring him.
"Morty, don't act like-like you don't know this is hard for me. I'm not used to all this fucking emotional crap. I don't bother with it. It's pointless. Bad, good. It's all subjective. It's just chemicals anyway and I don't happen to like chemicals controlling me. Nothing controls me! I control them. I'm basically a fucking cyborg now! A fucking god! I'm fuckin Rick. I shouldn't have to deal with this! I'm second thinking thi-this who-oouule conversation. You're such an ungrateful little shit! I'm-I'm trying to tell you something serious and you just keep opening your mouth and excreting bullshit. Maybe we-we should save this for another time when you're acting like less of a retard."
Morty could tell that he was trying to change the subject, trying to exit the conversation, trying to avoid the issue, and he wasn't having it.
"No! I don't wanna hear any more e-excuses! You never even tried to have feelings, not really! You fight everything and everyone ev-every time someone tries to get close to you. You ruined your relationship with my mom, with Unity, wi-with everyone you've ever come in contact with. So go ahead and just tell me what you want to so you can fuck this up too. You're scared R-rick! You're scared of feeling things because you-you can't handle it! Not because other people can-can't handle you."
Rick's gaze became hard for a moment, anger flashing across his features. He grabbed Morty's arm hard, as if he was going to strike him. Pain shot through the youth's arm. Just as quickly his hand went slack and his face softened into what? Remorse? Shame? It wasn't an expression that Morty was used to and it was difficult for him to read what he was thinking exactly.
The old man looked away from him, defeated. He was tired of arguing about the same damn thing all the time. Besides, the little idiot was right.
"You're all I got Moouurty, you know that you little, fucker? The only one I can reaouully trust.."
Morty looked anywhere but at Rick, nursing his arm, but he rolled his eyes.
"Duh, because like I said, you push everyone awa-"
"I know!"
Rick put his head in his hands, smoothing his hair back.
"I-i know... I just... No one- the only person who never left me was you. You put up with all my shit and you always let me come back to me..."
There was vulnerability in his tone.
"The only person who really knows me auund still puts up with me and didn't abandon me. I mean it almost happened so many times but you always came back.. Sure there's others who vie for my attention like your mom bu-but that's different. She doesn't really know me like you do. You know like, the real me. The real real Rick. The sick, dark, fuooucked up affront to the uni- to humanity."
This conversation was getting very strange. Rick never talked like this. He just admitted something Morty had wanted him to for years. Real honesty, no beating around the bush and pushing away the truth. He was basically saying that he loved him, in so many words anyway. Something Morty already knew. It should have made him happy though. He should be more emotional right now. So why did he feel so tense?
"What are you trying to say? Th-this is weird okay?"
His voice cracked. Morty was beginning to feel itchy. Something was wrong.
"I gotta tell you, Morty... I've been really lonely for a long time.."
He looked away not willing to meet Morty's eyes. His shoulders sagged, defeated.
Uh oh. No... no no...
"Just tell me already, Jesus!"
Rick screwed up his face. He looked like he was about to cry. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes. Definitely un-Rick-like. This wasn't the Rick he knew. The scientist always looked sad and defeated or bored. But never in tears.
"I'm in-in love with you Morty! Alright!? There, I said it. You're the only one who knows me and the only one who really gives a shit about me without wanting something in return. Th-these feelings I have, they're fucked okay?"
He put his head in his hands, holding back a sob or vomit, or both.
Revulsion crept over Morty's features until it was gradually replaced with hatred.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?! You-you think it's funny to say something like that to m-me?! Another ploy to get me to do, say, or agree to something you need me to do?! This isn't a game, Rick!"
He was suddenly on his feet. Rick refused to look at him, his demeanor was unflinching. Rick wasn't lying. It didn't matter, Morty plowed on refusing to accept it. He wouldn't, he couldn't.
"After all we've been through, after what you've put me through! I-it's not funny okay?! You think you can just mess with my-my head like I'm some toy!? I'm a person, Rick. Not like you give a shit! Not like you ever gave a shit!"
Rick flinched but he didn't move from where he was sitting. Morty was practically leaning over him, tears in his eyes, his hands balled into fists. He looked ready to beat the shit out of Rick, or at least ready to try.
His stomach ached. His voice was passive when he spoke and the man delivered the rest of what he had to say in a factual manner.
"I mean it Morty. I love you. Seeing you step up aaound not be a whiny little shit like your piece of garbage father, watching you beco- grow up and become a young man. You're worth more than you think, Morty..."
His voice broke.
"You really have saved my ass a few times. In more ways then you know. They say Ricks don't care about their Mortys... Well I sure care about you, you dumb little shit."
He looked away again after admitting this, was he blushing?
"Despite my best efforts to not give a rat's ass about you."
Rick looked uncomfortable in divulging all this, shifting and even trying to unconsciously pull away from the boy. And yet he looked relieved. But his face suddenly twitched with irritation at the silence he was greeted with, the angry glare. Really? After all this, he was finally confessing and this is how he was being treated? So he decided poke the bear so to speak.
"Not like you ever even deseoourved that kind of love, do you know how much of a hot commodity I am? What have you done to deserve me? Not much."
Morty took a sudden step closer, he was right over Rick, face close to his, fuming. The old man looked up at him tiredly. He didn't flinch but he wished he had a cigarette right about now. This was going about as well as he thought it would've. He sighed. Morty's expression was filled with loathing as he yelled in his face.
"FUCK YOU RICK! Yo-you think you're so fucking important! You-you think that you're the best fucking thing ever! Well I have news for you, you're not! I've done things too! Saved whole- whole civilizations! Whole worlds, just like you! You never thanked me! Never said 'good job, Morty.' and really meant it. Never even told me you love me until just now. AFTER YEARS! In fact you haven't even said I love you really! It's al-always implied with you. You're scared and you're a cold, heartless piece of cyn-cynical shit, you know that? I don't even want you anyway! Who would want you?! You don't even deserve love! I-i could even say everyone deserves it. Everyone but you!"
Rick let the insults roll over him though they did hurt. He flinched again. He had learned long, long ago how to minimize his expression of emotion, physically anyway, especially ones of pain. He looked thoughtful.
"What abooouut Hitler?"
Morty leaned down, close to Rick now, his fists clenched so tight his knuckles were white. That was all Rick had to say?!
Rick sincerely hoped the poor kid didn't try to hit him. He would have let him honestly but then he'd have to kick his ass. Couldn't have him getting too uppity. After all there needed to be a clear leader between them and there was no fucking way it wouldn't be him. 'Please don't make me do that Morty. I already almost hit you once..'
"Shut the FUCK! UP! You-you think you're so-so witty but you're not! You're not! You try to diffuse sit-situations an-and avoid real issues by blowing them off and acting like they don't matter! Well they do matter! They-they matter to me! And if you really do love me like that than you're a sick fuck! A depraved asswipe that thinks they-they can get whatever they want just because they're a grizzled old genius. So what if you've saved the universe countless times!? That doesn't matter if you're a-a-a monster!"
Rick winced slightly. This hit a little too close to home. He was used to being called a monster and worse. Even by Morty. But for some reason this time it cut through him. Perhaps it was because everything was in the open and despite that it didn't seem to change Morty's opinion of him at all. He had just told him that he was the one he cared about the most. Out of everyone in the existence of time and space. Morty had to be the one. The only one. I mean fuck he was bearing his fucking soul here! Fine. Time to get down to brass tacks than. He had to really come out and say it. Spell it out.
He waved his hand dismissively as if nothing Morty said was anything he gave a single shit about.
"Fine, let's cut the bullshit Morty."
His face was sullen again and he sighed. Honesty wasn't enough. He had to make it sound convincing.
"Out of all the people in the goddamn uuoou-niverse, across countless vertices and eons of time, I love you! I'm in love with you! Don't you get it? Doesn't that meeean anything to you? You think I'm just trying to fuck with you? I don't have time for tha-that kind of shit and you know it. I wouldn't go this far."
Morty stared at him as his mouth worked to form words but nothing came out. The look on Rick's face told him he was being sincere. He couldn't deny it anymore. Rick lied to him all the time but for some reason he could just tell this time that he was telling the truth. Morty could feel it. He sat down hard and looked away. He felt numb. What was he supposed to do with this information? How could Rick just tell him something like this? How could he feel something like this? Why? Why him? Where was this coming from? Had Rick finally gone insane? Well more insane anyway. What did he expect him to say? Nothing apparently because he plowed on.
"I don't make a habit out of fu- 'doing it' with children. I'm not that sick."
He had the decency to look away after saying this, feeling bile rise.
"I'm not a pedophile. I may be a sick piece of shit but I don't fuck kids. This isn't like I'm attracted to your body or anything, alright? Souu-o you can just-just get that out of your head right now. I've spent more time with you than anyone else. At least in the last three years. I've spent a lot of time with you. I know you and you know me. I know every hope and fear you-you have. Everything that makes you happy, what makes you sad. All of it. And whether I like it or not you know a-all the same things about me. At least most of it. And when you spend this much- this much time with someone, when you depend on someone this much, this often... When that person comes through for you- Haha okay well let's not get ahead of ourselves here, you've fucked uooup a lot-"
"Rick!"
"Okay! Look... Wh-what I'm trying to say is... We're all we've got... And... I'm honestly glad I've got you... I-I'm glad it's you. I could do a whole lot worse then a kid with some serious balls and a mouth and nerve to back it up."
His voice grew quieter.
"You're the only one without an agenda..."
He chuckled sadly and Morty dared to look at him, a strange feeling bubbling up in his stomach before looking away again. The complements were getting to him. They were complements, that's what they were. He felt a heavy, familiar hand pat his shoulder before ruffling his hair affectionately. His skin prickled.
"I love you, you little asshole. There aren't a-a lot of people strong enough to go through a Riiiouuck crash course and not be in mental shambles by now to the point of being a gibbering idiot. You've got a strong mind. You're strong-willed and you've gotten a lot wiser in just-just the few years I've known you. You came through it all, all of it, not exactly with grace or anything but you're here... We're-we're here... Me and you..."
Morty looked at him again. He looked pained. He knew just how messed up this was. But he also knew that their relationship was changing drastically with every word he spoke. Maybe for the better? What did this make them? He liked Rick, he had to admit he certainly admired him in a way. What was happening? His head was spinning.
"I know you're lonely too. I know you like Jessica but I gotta be honest; Jessica doesn't know shit, Morty. She-she doesn't know shit about you. I know things. I know you. And Jessica could never care about you, never take care of you the way I do."
Morty swallowed hard. He knew Rick was right. The old bastard was the closest, most personal relationship he'd ever had in his life. His skin tingled again where Rick touched his head and shoulder.
"S-so what are you trying to say?..."
Rick's eyes were surprisingly gentle.
"I wanna be held sometimes too Morty... Even old shitty, empty Rick. Everyone need that sometimes. I sure know you do. How could I miss it? The way you always whine about Jessica and love and all that crap. Why not be loved by someone whooouu I spend the most time with? Like I said, by someone who really.. really knows me?"
The kid felt shaken to his core. Was he really saying what he thought he was? And why didn't he hate this idea? He should hate this idea. It was revolting. He should tell Rick it was over, forever. That they could never go on any more adventures ever again. That he wasn't going to help him because he was sick in the head. Cut him off. Never see him again. But he didn't. He didn't move. It was true, he was so lonely. His eyes went wide as he spluttered, the words spilling out.
"So what you.. Y-you wanna have like sex or something? Is-is that what you're saying?"
He was embarrassed. Even more-so because it actually, dare he admit it, seemed a bit enticing. To be held and taken care of.
Rick rubbed the back of his neck and looked skyward.
"Jeez is that what you think this is? Is that a- aooull you think this is about? Fucking teenagers..."
He scoffed and looked at him critically.
"Yes okay maybe sometimes, yes. I-it'd be nice to get off with someone every now and then that I can trust. Someone that isn't a one night stand. And when that happens you can think about Jessica, whatever you have to. I don't gi-give a fuck. Do I really have to spell it out for you more than I already have? I just want to be together. B-be with you. I mean I already aooouum with you. We're stuck with each other. Might as well."
There was a hint of shyness in Rick's voice as he said this last part. Something Morty had surely never heard before.
Morty's lips pressed together and he scooted closer to Rick, his arms around his knees. He sat there like that for a while in silence, his chin pressed to his knees. After considering it for a long time, he scooted close enough so that his hip pressed against Rick's arm. He was close enough to feel his body heat. He was surprisingly warm. And somehow Rick's energy, his aura or whatever, was softer. He had to admit it was nice to be close to another person, hell another being, another anything that was warm. Something that was real and tangible and not fleeting. He knew Rick wasn't going anywhere, that was the thing. He was right. They would be together for a long time and he knew it. Rick and Morty forever, Rick and Morty for a thousand years.
Rick had gone quiet now. He stared at the fourth sun as it began to dip below the horizon, three other halos of different colored shades already fading from the curvature of the planet.
It was obvious by his lack of objections that Morty was quietly accepting his proposition. He wasn't exactly sure what this meant for their relationship. But he sincerely hoped it would bring them closer.
Slowly, carefully, he wrapped his arm around Morty and squeezed him close. His heart beat imperceptibly faster as he felt him cuddle up closer. He felt warm and comfortable, more than he had in a long time.
"Uhh.. You know i-if I'm a sick fuuuoouck then this makes you one too."
Morty leaned his head on Rick's chest and closed his eyes, flushing slightly as a tiny smile crossed his lips from the warm, comforting contact. Maybe this was what he really wanted after all.
"Fuck off, Rick."