Disclaimer: Alas, I am not Andrew Marlowe or ABC. And that's a damn shame, I tell you. I could do some amazing things if I got my hands on Castle. I don't even need the rights! I just want to sit at the writer's table! But alas, that is not in my future.
Chapter One:
If there's a God, she thinks that wherever he is, he's laughing at her. Well, maybe not laughing, but certainly delighting in his ability to make her so much less than she is, delighting in his ability to knock Kate Beckett to her knees in a single moment.
Tonight, she went home, brushed her teeth, braided her hair, and lifted the lid of her jewelry box. Swiftly, like she always does, she found the latch of her father's watch, unhooked it, placed it in its normal place. Fingers sliding along her neck, she felt for the smooth chain there.
But her fingers felt nothing but the smooth expanse of her skin.
She froze, her heart dropping, before speeding up, racing. Her fingers resumed their search, frantic, as she rushed to a mirror, pulling off her sweater as she went.
Standing there in a bra, she had to face the inevitable truth: her mother's ring? It was gone.
Her body shook, before she ran to the bathroom and lost the contents of her stomach in the toilet. Tears pushing past her closed eyes, forehead against the floor, words fell from her lips, uncontrollable. "Oh god. Oh my god. My god, oh my god. No. This… no this can't be happening. What? Oh god."
She couldn't help as her fingers continued to search in the apex of her breasts, right where the ring had hung for years, a weight she'd become accustomed to.
How had this happened? Her mother…
She was losing her all over again.
Kate Beckett didn't deal with loss well, never had. Even as a child, the loss of her favorite stuffed animal in a taxi had weighed heavily on her, the mourning period long. Her grandmother's death as a young ten year old taught her that you stood stoic at funerals, but cried in the bathroom. And her mother's death – well, she'd never really gotten over that one.
The ring had been a connection. Sitting at her heart, it seemed to beat with her, a reminder that even in her worst moments, her mother was somehow still there. She could toy with it and feel her mother's hug. When she brought it to her lips, her mother's kiss whispered over her cheek. She'd twist it as she looked at a murder board, lost in thought, and sometimes a single word would float into her mind – the word that made all the difference.
Her mother was with her, because of her ring.
Kate wasn't sure she would be able to keep herself together without it there.
"Mom, please. Oh god, please, mom," she pleaded, her heart cold, her body wrecked with tremors, every fiber of her being aching with sorrow.
Her phone buzzed from the bedroom, a low sound she registered unconsciously, but did not recognize as she curled into a fetal position, desperate for comfort, for something solid.
Desperate for her mother.
Author's Note: Hey guys! I'm a new writer, still trying to get my footing with fanfiction in general.
I'd really appreciate reviews – and please feel free to be critical! It's the only way I'm going to get better. While it's great to know people enjoy my writing, I want to improve for you all.
As for the story itself, right now I have three chapters written! It's looking like it should come out to be roughly 5-10 chapters, depending on where my lovely characters take it/whether people keep enjoying it!