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Enjoy.
One-shot.
Shepard rubbed her stomach slowly, tracing small circles. Laying on her large empty bed, she stared out the large window as she's done many times before. She still had lingering thoughts of Kaidan, the 'what-if's, the 'maybe's, and the 'wants'. What if she was still with Kaidan, and not Garrus? Maybe she can still be. She wants a child.
Shepard sits up suddenly, blue eyes widening at her thoughts. Sure, the idea of bearing children, taking care of them, watching them grow up, getting married was something she thought of numerous times but…it was a ridiculous idea.
She had Reapers to take care of, a galaxy to save, a romance she must pursue, and a ship to run. She had no time for children and their whining and their…she stopped thinking. Thinking like this could only further her want for children and a normal life, and that was unprofessional.
Sighing heavily, wiping her hands across her face in an effort to wake her tired self up, she tugged on her combat boots and trudged past her hungry fish and hamster. Her shoelaces untied, her black raven hair messy, barely any make-up on, casual wear wrinkled, Commander Shepard stepped into the elevator.
She need to talk to someone. Anybody that would listen. Anybody who had an ear. It just had to be someone.
Shepard walked past the mess hall, only two break-fast eaters at the tables. She could feel their stares penetrate her but forced herself to ignore it. She stepped into the Main Battery room, seeing Garrus asleep for once. The turian was always calibrating and she really shouldn't bother him. Giving Garrus' arm a small squeeze, she left him alone.
She could talk to Miranda, Samara, Kasumi, and Tali but…they wouldn't understand. They don't know the pressure of being the savior of the galaxy,, and wanting to be someone different. They could never understand, and because of that, she had no one to talk to.
Passing by the mess hall again, Shepard went back into the elevator to go to the cockpit. The doors opened soon afterwards and she passed by a tired-looking Kelly and made her way to Joker. Her feet still trudging, she slowed down to a stop behind his chair. "Take us to the Citadel. Give the crew a chance to use their paychecks."
"You got it Commander." Joker manually typed in the coordinates for the Citadel, having remembering it from typing it in so many times.
Shepard tiredly slouched into the co-pilot seat, drifting off into a much need sleep.
"Wake up Commander." Joker said while grabbing for his credit chit. "Commander…jeez…" Joker limped over to her and shook her shoulder roughly. "The Normandy is imploding! Who will save us now? It can't be Super Joker cause he is trying to wake up his damn Commander!" Joker dramatically narrated, loud enough to wake the Commander.
Shepard shifted around in her seat, and eventually opened up her eyes. He knew that whenever someone spoke to her during her sleep or right after she woke up, she'd only start to remember it hours or even days later. Smirking, he left to catch his pick-up cab.
Shepard yawned loudly, stretching her limbs separately. She groggily stood up, dizzy at first, and used her fingers as a comb to brush her hair. Looking down at her boots, she bent down, tying them loosely. She smoothed out her outfit a bit and looked around. Nobody was aboard the Normandy. 'The Citadel.'
Walking past security with a nod, she explored the Zakera Ward, peering into the stores every so often. Amongst the noises of people walking by or sales pitches being made, she heard a small whimper. Whipping around to see who it was, her eyes narrowed. A small thin child. No older than four.
She could feel something activate within her…it was a strong instinct and the instinct was to hug this child she hadn't ever met. She continued standing there, staring at the child. The urge was overwhelming as she opened her mouth, "Lost?"
The kid nodded, "My mommy and daddy died…" She started crying, and rushed to Shepard's side, hugging her tightly. She made a small 'oomph' sound and gently returned the hug. Shepard bent down to her level, making direct eye contact with the sobbing child.
"Everything will be alright…" She cooed, stroking the little girl's black hair. "It'll be fine…"
The little girl continued crying, her tears staining Shepard's clothing. The feeling only grew stronger when the little girl held onto her tighter. Shepard could feel her own tears working, knowing how it felt. "Shhh…shh…it'll be okay." She soothed the child, the natural instinct, the need to care, and the motherly feeling overcoming her.
The child let go slowly, her eyes puffy and cheeks streaked with tears. Shepard knew she had to report the child to C-Sec, find a suitable home for the child but she wasn't sure if she wanted to let go. She picked her up and decided to report her to C-Sec, but after she was done shopping. "Wanna go exploring?"
The child nodded, happy to be anywhere as long as it was with a person. "Yeah."
Shepard smiled, pointing out the various stores, interesting landmarks, and many advertisements which addressed her by name. "I gave each store I visited an endorsement, and I'm surprised they haven't….wait…Normandy imploding?" The child looked up at Shepard curiously. "Super Joker? Damn it Joker…"
She chuckled, now knowing what Joker was getting at. Trying to freak her out in the middle of nowhere; he knew that things came back to her at a slower rate when she was asleep. The little girl laughed too, not exactly knowing what was funny.
"Oh I'm sorry…Joker. He is the pilot for my ship, the Normandy." She explained, also knowing that the kid probably had no idea what she was talking about.
"Shepard!" A familiar turian voice said from behind her. She turned around, a wide smile on her face, still carrying the little girl. "What the…who the hell is that?"
"A child Garrus." Shepard whispered into the girl's ear, "That's Garrus Vakarian, a rather special friend of mine." She winked at him.
"Whose kid is that?" Garrus asked incredulously, disbelieving that in a million years Commander Shepard would be walking around the Citadel carrying a human child.
"Her parents died…" Shepard looked up at him with sad blue eyes, "And I just wanted to show her around a bit before taking her to C-Sec."
Garrus solemnly nodded, knowing what he can't give her, and knowing she had lost her parents as well. He was turian. She was human. Incompatible. No children. He had no idea that it was what she wanted; he heard the double meaning within her words. "Take your time."
Shepard would stay in this relationship with Garrus, because it was something she's never had. Stability.
Glancing at the little girl's face, she sighed and directly took her to C-Sec. "Time to go home." Garrus followed the pair, along with Tali who was watching the entire exchange from afar. Shepard brought the kid to Captain Bailey. "Can you find her a family?"
Bailey looked at her with questioning eyes but didn't protest. "You got it Commander. I'll take care of it as soon as possible." Bailey nodded, taking the child's hand.
Shepard thanked him, not giving the kid another glance as she headed toward the transit shuttles with Garrus and Tali following curiously behind. The little girl tugged on Bailey's hand, rushing to the doors before they closed. "Damn it. Get the kid!"
The trio was already getting into the shuttle when the little girl raced after them, arms flailing. "Wait!" She cried out, the shuttle picking up off the ground. Shepard pressed her hand against the window, silently watching as the little girl continued to yell out the words.
"Who is that Shepard?" Tali asked, staring down at the kid that Shepard so desperately wanted to get away from.
"A child like me."
