A/N: So this is obviously an AU story. Its set in kind of my own setting. Olivia is dating Brian but Elliot is still there. Olivia and Elliot got separated by IAB so Olivia is partners with Nick. Every paragraph will go back and forth between Bensidy, Bensaro, Bensler with a random Bensler ending. Is that confusing? Eh, whatever. BYYYYYYE.
Song: Sam Smith: Stay With Me
Disclaimer: I own nothing
There had been a time when she and Brian had had something odd from the beginning. They cared, but their relationship was more of just a cover up to friends. Somewhere along the way they had grown feelings for each other that had nothing to do with true love, nothing at all.
Guess it's true I'm not good at a one night stand.
But I still need love 'cause I'm just a man
These nights never seem to go to plan
I don't want you to leave will you hold my hand
Olivia knew this wasn't her thing. She knew, as Nick slammed her against her now slammed shut front door, that she would regret this in the morning. Yes, tomorrow morning they would wake up and she wouldn't want him to leave after what they had shared. The night had started out as drinking with the rest of the squad. But when both Elliot and Nick offered to drive her home, she chose Nick, but she didn't know why. She had no idea why she chose Nick.
Oh, won't you stay with me?
'Cause you're all I need
This ain't love its clear to see
But darling, stay with me
She and Elliot had always been passionate in their own way. It was New Year's Eve, 2011, and somehow, after they finished patrol in Times Square, they had ended up together in her apartment, making out like horny teenagers on prom night. As they stumbled towards her bedroom, she almost stopped, but she knew they had gone too far to stop now. She stopped thinking. Because they could have had something special.
Why am I so emotional?
No it's not a good look, gain some self-control
And deep down I know this never works
But you can lay with me so it doesn't hurt
She knew that she was becoming too emotionally involved with Brian. He was always parading her around. Always wanted her to look good. Never had they really talked about feelings. She needed to put a lid on her emotions right now. She should have known this would never work. She was terrible at relationships. That was her sudden revelation. She had to stop now, before Nick found out they were still dating. She felt dirty.
Oh won't you stay with me?
'Cause you're all I need
This ain't love it's clear to see
But darling, stay with me
She didn't love Nick. She kept telling herself that on her way to the 1-6. She wasn't sure if she believed herself. She looked at him from her office window and tried to believe the words she kept repeating until she really did. She looked over at Elliot and decided she had no idea what she was doing. But then Brian walked in. Great.
Oh, won't you stay with me?
'Cause you're all I need
This ain't love its clear to see
But darling, stay with me
Elliot. She wasn't sure what to do with him. She knew the sex was great with him. But she also knew that they had too much behind them. But was that enough to break it off? She decided in that very moment that she knew what was right for her.
She walked out into the squad room and looked all three men. She knew each one inside and out. But knew which one was for her, she walked up to Elliot and asked about lunch, they walked out hand in hand, not looking back.