by J. B. Tilton email:
Rating: G
Disclaimer: "Charmed" and all related characters and events are the property of the WB television network, except for those characters specifically created for this story. This is a work of fan fiction and no infringement of copyright is intended.
When Piper gets decides to fight a speeding ticket, she walks into the courtroom and finds bureaucracy demons at every turn.
ONE
Piper walked into the manor and slammed the door. She slammed it so hard the frame rattled. She threw her purse on the entryway table just as Phoebe and Leo came out of the living room.
"You okay?" Phoebe asked, concern in her voice.
"No," Piper nearly shouted, holding up a pink piece of paper. "I got a stupid speeding ticket in a town about ten miles south of San Francisco. I was picking up some of those melons you liked so much at the farm where they grow them. I decided to take a short cut and while I was passing through this town called Brewster, Barney Fife pulled me over and gave me a ticket. He claimed I was going fifty-seven in a thirty mile zone."
"So you got a ticket," Leo said. "I happen to know it's not the first time."
"No, it's not," said Piper. "But this time I wasn't speeding. The speed limit was thirty and just before the cop pulled me over I looked at the speedometer. I was doing exactly thirty miles an hour. It's a speed trap if you ask me."
"So what's the big deal?" Phoebe asked. "It's just a ticket. Pay the fine and forget about it."
"It's the principle of the thing," Piper said. "Besides, the fine is eight hundred ten dollars."
"Eight hundred dollars?" Phoebe questioned. "For a speeding ticket?"
'Seems a bit excessive to me," Leo said.
"Yeah," Piper said. "The cop said the fine was thirty dollars for every mile over the speed limit. Talk about a racket."
"What racket?" Cole asked, coming in the front door. "Hey, Piper. I didn't know you were back."
"I got home a few minutes ago," Piper said. "The racket I was talking about was a speed trap in a town called Brewster just south of San Francisco. I got a ticket today."
"So?" Cole questioned. "That's no big deal. Pay the fine and forget it."
"It's eight hundred dollars," Piper said.
"Eight hundred dollars?" Cole questioned. "How fast were you going?"
"The cop said he clocked me doing twenty-seven miles over the speed limit," Piper said. "I wasn't. I was doing the speed limit. There was no way I was going that fast."
"Well," Cole said, "unless you have some kind of proof, it's pretty hard to beat a ticket like that. Basically it comes down to your word against the cops' word. And he has the radar gun to back him up."
"Then his gun is broken," Piper said. "Cole, you're a lawyer. Can't you help me with this? Maybe get it dropped or something?"
"First of all," Cole said, "I'm an Assistant District Attorney, not a defense attorney. Second, I'm an ADA in San Francisco. This Brewster is in a different jurisdiction. I couldn't get it dropped even if I wanted to."
"Isn't there anything you can do for her, sweetie?" Phoebe asked, cuddling up to Cole. "It doesn't seem right that she should have to pay an outrageous fine like that especially since she's not guilty."
Cole looked at Phoebe. Then he looked at Piper. Finally, he sighed.
"Okay," he said finally, "I'll look into it. But I can't promise anything. Like I said, tickets like this are very hard to beat. I'll do what I can but you should bring your checkbook just in case. When are you supposed to go to court?"
"By next Friday," Piper said, smiling. "Thanks, Cole. I appreciate anything you can do to help."
"Just don't get your hopes up," Cole said. "I'll go down on Thursday and have a look around. Maybe I can find some extenuating circumstances we can use. There must be some angle we can exploit here."
"Spoken like a true lawyer," Leo said, smiling.
"Well," Cole said, "I am a lawyer. Don't worry about the ticket for now. There's nothing we can do about it until next Friday so just forget about it. We'll worry about it on Friday."