A/N: Just something whacky I decided to write last year. This is the only chapter that isn't new. The rest have/are being written day by day now, while this one is the only one written last year. I didn't originally plan on extending this, but things change, so enjoy and please leave a review!

Twenty-five years had passed since the destructive artificial creation of Dr. Gero, Cell, was killed by the collective efforts of Son Goku, Son Gohan, and Vegeta. Peace was restored to the planet, and the population prospered once more. The Zet Senshi went their separate ways – Yamcha moved in with Bulma and started working for Capsule Corporation, which he excelled at; Tenshinhan and Chaozu grew apart and eventually Chaozu killed Tenshinhan in his sleep; Krillin and #18 got married, and were #18 was scheduled to have twins, but one of the babies died in the womb when the other kicked its head off; Piccolo went to live on New Namek after realizing he had been neglecting his Namekian ancestry; Vegeta left Earth to start a new Saiyan empire, leaving Bulma to care for Trunks all alone, not that she wasn't used to it; Son Goku and Son Gohan continued their training, although Gohan entered high school after Chi-Chi died of obesity and nobody cared to wish her back.

"Gohan, it's time to do the laundry!" shouted Goku, standing in front of the clothes rack with a dumbfounded look on his face. "I never remember how to do this. I wish Chi-Chi had written down the directions."

Gohan flew onto the scene, landing next to his father. He'd gotten shorter over the years, mainly due to malnutrition since he never learned to catch his own food and Goku was too lazy to do it. His hair had begun receding and his cheeks sagged like a turkey's butt. He stared at the clothes rack, thinking hard about his next move.

"Dad, I think we should wish Mom back to life so she can do this for us," Gohan suggested, crossing his arms.

Goku immediately turned Super Saiyan and roundhouse kicked his son's head off. He blasted the pieces to ashes and said, "Don't ever say such an evil thing in my presence, you bastard!"

Suddenly, a pink beam of chi buzzed past his head. He turned to see Freeza, King Cold, and Cooler a few yards away from him with evil grins on their faces.

"Long time no see, monkey," Freeza said.

Shocked, Goku got into a defensive stance, readying himself for the inevitable fight. "You three! I thought I got rid of you for good years ago! How did you come back?"

Cooler raised his index finger. "It's really quite complicated, so I'll dumb it down for your tiny monkey brain. We killed King Enma and escaped Hell."

How did I not sense them coming? Goku thought, gritting his pearly white teeth. They killed Enma!"I'll never forgive you for what you did! I'll destroy you and send you right back to Hell, and I'll make sure you never get out again!"

"Temper, temper!" King Cold teased, stepping in front of his sons. "I don't think we'll be the ones going to Hell this time. We've gotten stronger. Even by myself, I'm sure I could handle you."

"We'll see about that!"

Goku gave a battle cry as he charged toward them. They all stood nonchalantly still as he went at them with vicious kicks and punches. When he was finished, he backed off and observed the damage he'd done.

"What?!" was all he could shriek.

None of them had even a scratch on their bodies. It was as if he hadn't attacked them.

Cold smirked. "Stop fooling around, Goku. Or was that really your best?"

The Saiyan seethed, blazing his aura fiercely. "I'll show you my best!" He crouched, cupping his hands to his side. "Ka…!"

"Uh-oh! We better not get hit by that or we could die!" Freeza cackled, obviously unafraid of Goku's impending attack.

"Me…!"

Cooler crossed his chest and turned his back. "I'll handle this one, if you don't mind."

"Ha…!"

Cold nodded. "Go ahead, Cooler. You always were the best in our clan defensively."

"Meeee…! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Fueled by rage, a gigantic beam of blue chi shot forth from Goku's palms, jettisoning toward the Cold family. Freeza and King Cold stepped back behind Cooler, who still had his back turned. The beam got closer and closer, the extreme heat it produced singing the ground beneath it. It was going to be the end of the evil mass murderers.

Cooler whipped it away with a quick swipe of his tail.

Shocked to his core at how powerful his enemies had become, Goku fell to his knees, his eyes wide, his mouth agape, and cold sweat sliding down his cheeks. He reverted to his normal state as Cooler faced him. They're too powerful…but how?

"If it makes you feel any better, that was merely a quarter of my true, terrifying power," Cooler touted, his lips curling at the ends into a wicked smile.

"Do you see how futile it is to keep fighting now, monkey?" Freeza asked, snickering.

King Cold stepped over to Goku, picking him up by his shirt. "Don't expect your friends to help either. The Namekian? We blew him up with his entire planet. That traitor Vegeta? Blown to bits. Those pathetic humans that tagged along with you? They were easier to kill than a bunch of Arlians."

"But I won't be!"

Before Cold could turn his head, a small human foot slammed into it, snapping it back so hard his spine snapped, killing him instantly. His body fell to the ground in a slump. Levitating above him was none other than Bulma Briefs, fully clothed in Saiyan battle armor that Vegeta had left over. She didn't waste time disposing of Freeza and Cooler, spin-kicking their bodies to dust in no time.

"Bulma? What—"

Goku's sentence was interrupted as she jabbed her hand through his chest, pushing his heart and lungs out the other side.

"That's payback for not being the biological father of Trunks."