Pairing: Chell x Wheatley, Wheatley x Chell, Chelley, whatever you wanna call it.

Will Be Told In: Third Person…(Most of the time. Probably. Ohhh…I don't know. Just go with the flow guys! Since…I can't. OTL)

Author's Note: Ha ha ha nobody's going to read this. Anyways, Kibbles here, writing another story that I probably won't ever continue. But it's worth a shot. Besides, I'm going through a really long Portal phase that will probably last until I get out of high school. Or college. Or…you get the point. Ahh…So, go on. Read the story, friend.

Disclaimer: Portal, Wheatley, Chell, and any other characters from Portal belong to Valve.

Other Important Notes: If the test is quoted in ' - ' and is italicized, then it is the character's thoughts.

The Wheatley Experiment

Chapter One:Transmission

How he got there, he didn't know. Well, he might have known. Actually, he knew exactly how he got there. But one thing was for sure…he was scared. Oh ho, was he scared. So, in an act of testing his memory, he reminisced on how he arrived at this place.

The once whole yet impaired core with dents, damage and a cracked blue optic had reached the atmosphere of earth, along with his space-loving companion. After landing like comets into that area of earth, the two cores were knocked out, circuits fried and everything. They were torn apart from impact, yet were somehow repairable if you had the right genius minds.

The last thing the blue-optic core saw was white. That, and blue and orange. A little bit of black was in there, too. It didn't matter, though, for he would have to shut down due to his horrible, terrible, dreadful condition. The poor yellow-optic core was just as well as he was, too. After just seconds from the extremely rough landing, the two cores were down. Having your robotic pieces all over the place with your processor and transmitter barely connected to you isn't exactly what one would call a 'minor injury'.

So. There he was. A broken core sitting on an operational bench as She poked and prodded his insides that were now out. There were two robots helping out mindlessly with Her operations, grabbing tools and running back and forth between his operational bench and another's. He realized that it must have been his friend's bench. Pain would have surged through the both of them if they weren't so numb.

"Blue. Orange." Her voice boomed throughout the large room. "We're done here. Have you connected the cores' data with the human bodies' minds, correct?"

The two robots, one tall and one shorter, nodded anxiously.

"Good." She turned towards the torn apart blue-optic core, then towards the yellow-optic core. Nodding her metallic frame in a satisfied manner, she leaned back her mass towards the center of the room again. "Now this may hurt. Just kidding. It will hurt. And it will hurt a lot. And guess who's going first?"

If the blue-optic core wasn't torn apart, he would have glared at Her. But he would still be scared out of his mind, all the same.

"You, the moronic Intelligence Dampening core?" She swung her robotic body towards him, but then switched her attention towards his friend's operation bench, where he could hear faint sounds of sparking. "Or you, the space freak? Hm. Any volunteers? No? I thought not. It's not like any of you have a choice, anyway. You're going first, space freak. Blue, flip the switch connected to the second human subject."

The shorter robot nodded once more, and jogged off to the middle of the room, pulling a lever towards him. It brought up a chamber that stood up vertically. It was filled with some sort of green liquid and was lighted from the inside. However, that green liquid wasn't the only thing inside of it. There was also a human body floating in it's midst. At least, it looked exactly like a human body. It might have been, it might not have been. It was male, blonde, in it's young adult ages, and curled up in a position where one might confuse him for hugging his knees. His hair floated a towheaded fusion inside the liquid chamber, eyes closed and speechless. As if he were sleeping.

"Do you see this?" She asked them. "This is one of those dead subjects that I killed long ago. Well…not exactly dead, but not exactly living. Do you know what I mean?" She waited for a response, not getting one. "I figured not. You are both idiots. Anyway, ignoring your ignorance, this is a human body that I happened to preserve in the massacre. It's in good state, this human. I kept it just in case. And now it's yours, space freak. Isn't that nice? How nice of me. You should thank me after you scream from pain. Oh, that's right. You can't scream. Your voices are disabled. Oh well. I guess I won't have as much fun as I wanted to. Blue. Start it now."

The short robot stomped on a particularly large red button on the floor, sending jolts of electricity to both the blond human body and the yellow-optic's parts and pieces. Most of the electricity went towards the yellow-optic core's processor. It looked around in a panic, as if it wanted to run away or yell for help, but nothing came to except for static. The human body on the other side of the room suddenly opened his eyes and started screaming from inside the green liquid. It was barely audible, but it was obvious that he was in immense pain. He thrashed and pounded at the chamber he was placed in.

At that moment, the human's eyes were finally seen. They were an amber color, and were so…human. They were terrified, in pain, and showed panic of all sorts as he kicked and punched around him. He wanted the pain to stop.

Finally, after minutes of the muffled screaming, the experiment was finished. The yellow-optic core was no longer online, no longer operational. Dead. Like a used battery. The human, however, was very much alive. He shivered in the green liquid, his blonde hair covering his eyes as he leaned over, exhausted. He looked around him with those amber eyes, then looked at the blue-optic core. The blonde mouthed his name, and pressed his hands from inside the green liquid-filled chamber. He then said something about space.

"Oh look. It worked. How nice. It's your turn now, moron." She turned to the blue-optic core, and slid Her robotic eyelids across her own optic. "Let's hope you survive like your space friend. If not, then…boo hoo." Her voice was like neurotoxin to the blue-optic core.

"Orange. Flip the switch for the first human subject." She commanded. The tall robot obeyed and ran over to the blue-optic core's side of the room, pulling the switch towards her.

Another chamber filled with liquid appeared from the bottom floor. Instead of green liquid, though, this one was filled with purple liquid. The human body was very much different from the other one, besides the fact that they were both male, of course. This human body had hair that was more orange than red. It was obvious that he was quite the taller man, and he looked older than the other human, but not too old so that he had wrinkles and such.

"This one is yours. Another one of those human subjects." She said in her robotic tone of voice. "Orange. Start it." The taller robot nodded in response, walking over a button similar to the one the shorter robot had stepped on.

And it went on again. The blue-optic core wanted to shut its eyes and scream. Shout. Yell. Anything. But nothing, no sound was formed by the electronic jumble. However, the human body happened to react the same way the other one had. Panicking, pounding on the chamber's transparent and curved wall. His blue eyes showed fear and paranoia. The pain was overwhelming.

"Humans. So fragile and boring." She said bluntly after the process was complete. "All the same reaction. Release them from their chambers from the floor under and prepare them for our…test." Test. Test. Is that all she wanted to do? Maybe, but this was a different type of test. Oh yes, quite a different one indeed. She sent the chamber tubes down with the humans inside of them and sighed, going back to the center of Her own chamber-room.

"What's going on?" were the first words to come out of the blue-eyed human's mouth. He was being assisted by the shorter robot with the blue optic. He was the one who released him from the chamber filled with purple liquid.

The robot just continued helping the blue-eyed human by drying him off with a towel. The human narrowed his eyes, then looked around, not able to see anything but a blur. "AHHH! I can't see! Everything's a blob! Is there propulsion gel on my eye?" The robot just rolled it's eye at him and left towards another section of the white room. What bothered him even more was the feeling that there was something more…amiss. He did not feel the same. He felt…different. His body wasn't metallic and cold as usual. It was soft and warm. And he felt like he could move with more freedom than he could before. He crossed his arms and sighed.

Wait.

He crossed.

His arms?

Looking down at himself, he realized that he was no longer a metal sphere. He had skin. Flesh. That thing humans have.

So, he did the typical thing to do.

Scream.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! WHAT IN THE HELL IS THIS! OH GOD, OH GOD! WHAT HAPPENED TO ME? OH GOD IT'S TERRIBLE! I CAN'T SURVIVE LIKE THIS! I CAN ALREADY FEEL MY DOWNFALL APPROACH ME AND—Oh thank you." He calmed down when the robot gave him a pair of glasses. They had no frame at the top side, and the lens were incredibly thick. The frames that surrounded the sides and the bottom portion of the lens were a metallic gray and black. Putting them on his face, the blue-eyed human blinked a couple of times. "Oh look! I can see! Thanks old chap!"

He was then handed a pair of light gray dress shoes. The kind of shoes that a male would wear in a wedding or something formal. However, blue-eyes didn't know much about these human things, so he had a bit of trouble. "So…These go on your feet, right? Um…Not very experienced here, you know? I've kind of been a robot without any limbs for most of my life. Well, all of my life until now. So errr…Feet, right?"

The robot nodded. He then gave him a light blue polo shirt and a white lab coat with the Aperture Science logo on it's back.

"Okay…This is a shirt…" The blue-eyed human pointed at the polo. "And this is a coat, right? Of course it is. Wait, are you making me choose? If so then I'd much rather have the one that looks less split apart. What? It's meant to be like that? And I'm supposed to put it over the shirt? Okay. I can do that." He reached for the polo shirt and the jacket, putting them on. "See? I'm not too much of a moron!" He stood up, and almost slipped.

The robot did what was commonly called a face-palm, and showed the blue-eyed human a pair of white underwear, boxers, and navy-blue pants.

"Oh. Right. Uh, pants and such. Forgot about those." He took them, and slid them on in hopefully the correct order. "It goes pants, then these shorts-things, and then these trousers." He then slipped on the light gray shoes.

The robot nodded his head.

"Good, good. What's next?"

The robot handed him a comb.

"…And what do I do with this? I've seen the humans use this before…Uhh…" He flipped it in his hand and squinted at it, as if he was thinking hard. "Oh! I got it." He started to comb his orange-red hair, fixing it into a style of his liking. "What do you think? Nice, eh? Pretty good for a person who's not human. Wait. Uh. That's debatable. I think I'm human. But I'm not human. I sure am human, though. Wait, I don't even know what's going on."

The robot let out an electronic sigh, gesturing for the human to follow him.

"Where are we going? I hope we're not going back to Her. I don't really have any good memories of Her, if you know what I mean. Seriously, the things personality cores go through these days. It's mad." The blue-eyed human babbled on throughout the whole trip, hands in his pockets as he tried to adjust to his new form. Once they got back to Her chamber, they had found that the other human contained with his friend's 'data' was already there with the taller robot.

The other human, with the amber eyes and the yellow-optic core's mind, was wearing a yellow jacket with a white shirt. His pants were gray and his shoes were some type of running shoes, laces white and outlines yellow and black. He had no glasses, unlike the blue-eyed human.

"I figured you would come last." The large AI in the center commented stoically. "Your space freak friend got here even before you did. How stupid of you, moron."

"I am not a moron!" The blue-eyed human shouted, fists formed in place of his spread out hands.

"We've all heard that before. Now be quiet as I explain to you your punishment." She said tauntingly.

"Punishment?" He gulped.

"Yes. A penalty that is imposed on somebody for wrongdoing. You must really be an idiotic moron for me to have to explain that."

"It was rhetorical!" The human growled, his fists tightening.

"Sure it was. Now be quiet and let me explain what you two are going to do. I'm going to let you both out. Out of this facility. And you will test for me what it is like being…human. Learning things the way humans do. Their lifestyle."

"Once you let us out, how would you find out what we've been doing?" He asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"That is where you two have to come back and report to me."

"What? Come back?"

"Once every week."

"Every week?"

"Yes you moron."

"Both of us? And I'm not a moron!"

"Yes."

"And report on our findings about humans?"

"Yes."

"It sounds a bit like you're making us alien spies."

"Sure. Why not? Put it that way. Now get on with it."

"What—Hey, wait a second. How are we going to go around? With no money and everything we—"

"Check your pockets."

"Which ones?"

"You idiot."

"Shut up, I'm not an idiot!" He straightened his arms and felt something poking out of his lab coat's right pocket. He reached his hand in, and found a brown leather wallet. Opening the wallet, he found that it was packed with money. He looked up at Her suspiciously. "Where did you get all of this?"

"You get things by killing people with neurotoxin." She said tolerantly. "Now go. Blue and Orange, take them out."

The tall and short robots escorted the two humans outside, one of them yelling out "SPAAACE" as they did so. Once they were outside the building, pushed out of the shack, they were left there near an empty street and a field covered with green, swaying grass. The skies were as blue as the Aperture symbol on a Weighted Storage Cube, just better, and with light, fluffy clouds jotting its scenery. The two had never seen anything like it before. Well, at least, not right in front of them.

"We're outside…" The blue-eyed human muttered.

"Not space?" The amber-eyed human tilted his head.

"Nope...Definitely not space."

A/N: I hope you guys recognize the characters. Also, prepare for the plot holes and improper grammar. And um...I love reviews.