Mr. Mom
Song By:
Lost my job and came home mad,
Got a hug and a kiss and "that's too bad"
She said, "I can go to work until you find another job."
Harry Potter came home exhausted and mad. He threw his brief case on the couch and walked into the kitchen to find his wife Hermione and their 2 year old son James baking cookies. Hermione had her hair pulled back with flour on her nose. Harry walked up to her and kissed the tip of her nose.
"What's wrong?" she asked him, pulling him into a tight embrace.
"I lost my job at the Ministry. They said that since I won't be the 'poster boy', that I cannot keep my job."
"That's horrible! I can go full time at St. Mungo's, though! They've been asking me for ages to go full time!" his wife exclaimed. She was a Healer at the wizarding hospital.
I thought I like the sound of that
Watch TV and take long naps
Go from a hardworking Dad
To being Mr. Mom
"That shouldn't be too hard." Harry replied. "Taking care of James and our baby Lily shouldn't be that hard."
"Sure Honey. They want me to go in tomorrow."
"Fine with me."
Well, Pampers melt in the Maytag dryer
Harry made the first stupid mistake, and ruined the entire load of laundry. Meanwhile, while he was mending the clothes with his wand:
Crayons go up one drawer higher
James got into the crayons and drew all over the walls.
Rewind Barney for the fifteenth time,
Breakfast 6, naps at nine
There's bubble gum in the baby's hair
He gave James bubble gum to settle him down and to fix the writing on the walls: what an idiotic decision. James tried to blow a bubble, but spit it out onto Lily's hair.
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
The potatoes were for lunch. Emphasis on WERE.
Been crazy all day long,
And it's only Monday Mr. Mom
Harry fell into bed that night and fake cried into his pillow, while Hermione snickered the entire time beside him.
Football, Soccer, and Ballet
Squeeze in Scouts and PTA
And there's that shopping list she left
That's seven pages long
All Harry thought while in the grocery store chasing after James was that he should have hired a baby sitter. And on top of that, Lily kept spitting up her breakfast. Harry had to clean her three times already and then change his shirt four times.
How much smoke can one stove make?
The kids won't eat my charcoal cakes
It's more than any man can take
Being Mr. Mom
Note to self, Harry thought. Never bake again. So they had to go out for pizza.
Well, Pampers melt in the Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Remind Barney for the sixteenth time
Breakfast six, naps at nine
There's bubble gum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long
And it's only Monday (But really Tuesday) Mr. Mom
He cried again that night. Hermione kissed him on the lips and fell asleep next to him. He fell asleep instantly, but was reawaken by his own worries.
Before I fall in bed tonight
If the dog didn't eat the classified
I'm going to look just one more time
'Cause Pampers melt in the Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Rewind Barney for the eighteenth time
Breakfast six, naps at nine
There's bubble gum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long, ohh
Been crazy all day long
And it's only Monday (Tuesday!!!) Mr. Mom