Okay, so, I moved into my Grandpa's house, and my laptop doesn't get internet here.

Three words.

I'm. Gonna. Die.

Anyway, I was watching TV because there was nothing else to do and my creativity was just Pthpbthpthbthp. Yeah. So, I was watching cartoons with my little brother and sister, and this one rather suggestive commercial came on.

Then I realized I've never written a MelloXMatt for Fanfiction, and for me, that's a major shock. O.o And thus, this demented, deformed, and probably-badly-written baby was born. I wrote you all a yaoi. You better fucking be happy dammit!

And I don't own Death Note. Happy? Good. I'm glad you found joy in crushing my fragile dreams. TT_TT I also don't own anything mentioned in this fanfic, 'cept for the one miniscule mention of Amethystte :D

Enjoy and don't ever, ever forget to review, because Mello and Matt will assume that you hate them, and nobody wants that, now do we? I thought not. And if this sucks, please forgive me, it's really late and I'm not supposed to be on the computer right now. Just read the goddamn story!!! DX

Matt POV

Alright, my life is officially ruined.

Mello and I were moving out of our apartment and into a real house, and guess what? One of the moving vans crashed into a telephone pole, and then, when they tried to back up, they rammed the back of the van into another pole. The whole back end of it was crushed, as was everything in it.

And guess who's videogames were in that very van? Yeah. MINE. Every single one of them. All of my precious games. Not a single one left to ease my troubled nerves. Not even that old Barbie computer game I used to play with Amethystte's (An old friend from Wammy's) daughter.

Mello doesn't get what the big deal is, but that's because he doesn't understand my need for them. I need them like I need cigarettes and Mello's ass. Mostly Mello's ass. Let's see him go without chocolate for more than half an hour. I'm almost as bad as that, just a teensy bit scarier. Yeah. Me, scarier than Mello? I know you're thinking that could never, ever happen, but really. It's true.

The previously mentioned chocoholic himself sat down on the other end of the couch I was curled up in a fetal position on.

Mello POV

Wow, Matt was kinda creeping me out. He was shaking and mumbling random words like, "R1, Mario, Jump, Jump, Duck, Y, Sonic the Hedgehog, X! X! X! L2! Barbie!"

Okay, I'm officially worried for his sanity.

Matt POV

"Geez Matt, the last time I saw you this jittery was the day I put crack in your cornflakes." He said, a joking, yet worried tone in his voice.

I froze. "YOU GAVE ME CRACK?! YOU SAID IT WAS SUGAR YOU FUCKING LIAR!" I screeched, my voice breaking halfway through my screaming. Okay, so maybe I was being a little bit dramatic, but really! I can't be Matt without the videogames, goggles, and cigarettes! They're like my trademark! Sure, I still have the cigs and goggles, but only two of them without the third is like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the bread! It just doesn't work!

Mello sighed, and before I really noticed what was happening, he pinned me to the couch and made a pouty face. "Are your videogames more important than me?" He whimpered.

My eyes widened. "No, no, no, no, no! Of course not! Videogames are nothing compared to you, they just keep me entertained when we're not doing anything." I said quickly, not wanting to upset the blond.

He smirked. "Then allow me to entertain you for now." I found myself smiling, this was exactly what I needed to calm myself down, to get my mind off of the videogames for now.

Mello's lips found mine immediately, our tongues battling over who would top today. It was a close match, but Mello won. He started kissing along my jaw, then my neck, unzipping my heavy tan vest all the while. As he pressed his mouth to mine again, I slipped out of the vest without breaking the kiss, and the blonde's hand travelled down to my jeans, where he slowly pulled down the zipper. Knowing Mello, the hesitation and unhurriedness would end very soon. His lips never leaving mine, I tangled my gloved fingers into his golden hair and felt the denim material sliding down my legs, along with my Xbox boxers, and then—

Ding dong!!!

Mello growled. "Damn it all. Just when it was getting good."

I sighed and pulled my pants back up as he angrily stomped to the front door. "What do you want!?" I heard him shout. Worried that whoever was at the door would get critically injured, I hurried to my lover's side.

Several men stood there, horrified looks on their faces and our relatively large television in their arms. I relaxed a bit, seeing that nobody was harmed. "So wh-where do you want the TV?" One of the men asked nervously.

I smiled and let them in, telling Mello to sit on the couch and not talk until the movers were gone. He grumbled something about him not being a kid and that I'm being a total jackass by making him sit out like a child being punished. Well, this 'jackass' is not only the only one in this city, or even state or country perhaps, who would stay up all night to do unspeakable things with him, but he's also paying the bills and buying a certain bitchy blond he lives with chocolate every six or seven hours.

Once the television was set up, I flopped down next to Mello and turned it on, flipping through the channels. I soon found out that there was only one channel that wasn't just static or completely black.

Nickelodeon.

'Oh goody, SpongeBob's on!' I thought sarcastically, watching a talking sponge dance around the screen. I turned to Mello, and his eye was twitching. I doubted he could stand much more of this. Poor thing. Too bad I'm not changing the channel. It was the only thing on and I needed something to turn my brain to mush and completely tune everything out.

"Matty, honey?"

"Yeah Mells?"

"Turn the goddamn television off before I rip the remote out of your cold dead hands and smash the TV to pieces with it."

I considered my options. One: Do what he says and not get myself, or the TV, hurt, or two: Not do what he says and begin writing my will while Mello shreds everything in the house to microscopic proportions. Like the total fucking dumbass I am, I chose option two.

"..." I didn't say a word, probably signing my death warrant with that silence.

"Matt." He said through gritted teeth.

"…" I ignored him.

"Matt."

"…" I gulped, staying silent.

"MATT!!!!"

The remote mysteriously flew across the room and out the window, shattering the glass into millions of tiny shards as it went. Mello went quiet. "Geez Matt, if you really didn't want to turn it off you could have just said so. You didn't need to throw the remote into the yard…" He said apprehensively.

The commercials suddenly went on. I sighed as an ad for shampoo popped up. It was the next commercial, one for a little kid golf-set-thing, that made my eyes bulge out of their sockets.

'The gator mouth opens really wide! Can you get your gator golf balls inside?!'

Oh my god. Sexual innuendos much! Someone should sue that company. That commercial could be a bad influence on small children! Or worse, it could be giving the more-often-than-not horny blond next to me ideas.

I looked over to the side to see Mello smirking at me. "Oh Maaaaaaaaaaaatty!" He cooed, crawling towards me on the couch.

The blond slithered on top of me, grinning ear to ear. He trailed his lips across my neck, softly nipping and sucking at my skin. His hands found their way down to my pants again, pulling them down for the third time today (The first was a few hours ago in the back of another moving van, since Mello drove our car into the pacific ocean(1)). He kissed me on the mouth again, running his tongue along my bottom lip, begging for entrance. Pshh, he didn't even need to ask once, I granted it to him immediately. I suddenly noticed that the TV was still on.

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1: I just chose a random ocean without really thinking it out logically…

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Sorry, no sex scene this time, but if you ask nicely, I might add an extra chapter with all the lemony goodness you want! XD So has anybody else seen that commercial? For the people that have, did you notice the innuendos in it? My brother LOL'd so hard when I told him I was going to write this. :)

So, what'd you think? I personally thought that was the best yaoi I've ever written, but that may be because I'm not afraid to write what's really on my mind when I'm about to fall asleep. My yaoi fangirl works 24/7 too, and I could probably write a good sized MelloXMatt or SasuNaru fluff in my sleep! XD Nah, probably not, but wouldn't that be cool? Just leave a laptop on while you sleep and your inner yaoi fan will type you out a whole yaoi/shounen ai fanfic for when you wake up! Wouldn't that be the best thing in the world? I think so. :D

Anyway, review or die. :) I has a Death Note, so don't piss me off bitch. Thanks! X3

It's tempting, isn't it? You know you wanna.

V