A/N: All right, so this fanfic just came into our minds at 5:40 AM on AIM, and like it sort of happened... This is just a crack fic, no way is it involved in our TVs Are Starting to Revolt fanfic, just pure crackness, k?

Lyn: Because crack is our... well, crack!

1. Kurama's Announcement

"Lyn is my what!?"

Lyn blinked several times in quick succession, momentarily at a loss for words. Surely she must have misheard that...

Kurama nodded. "Yes, I'm going away for a couple of years, and I need someone to parent Reneey. So, for three years, Lyn is Reneey's legal mother and Hiei is her legal father."

"Are you kidding me!?" Hiei snorted. "I'm not going to father that brat!"

"Hey! I'm not a brat you asshole!"

"Can we stop with the bickering long enough for me to ask a question?" Lyn interrupted loudly before raising an eyebrow at Kurama. "Aside from the expected questions like 'What have you been smoking?' and 'What paper bag did you pull this plan out of?' that is... Why the heck are you picking me instead of Dad? I mean, he is her godfather."

"I know," Kurama said, nodding. "But he is busy in demon world right now, trying to keep demons from entering the human world. And also because you know her better than anyone else," he added with a smile. "Anyway, I'm leaving in five minutes; here at the documents. Goodbye!"

So the redhead gave Lyn a stack of official-looking papers before going off to wherever he was going off to for three years.

Reneey blinked and looked at Lyn. "So like, I have to call you... *mom*? That.. would feel awkward..."

"Why? Because you think you're replacing your real mother?" Hiei asked.

Reneey snorted. "No way; I'd pick a monkey over my real mother. But because Lyn and I have always been like sisters, and now it's gonna be weird calling her mom." She twitched. "Not that I wouldn't mind having Lyn as my mother, it's just awkward..."

"Whatever, hn." And with that, Hiei left out of the window and onto a tree.

"Deja vu," Reneey muttered, but of course only Lyn actually understood what she meant by that; Hiei just shrugged it off and muttered a 'baka.'

Lyn frowned. "No, it's not. Though I personally fail to comprehend how your dad thinks I can pass for your mother... I mean, we don't look that different, but you have a different accent and then there's the little fact that I'm eighteen..."

Reneey blinked. "Uhh... you had sex at the age of 2... the dad fled... and out popped me... and like... somehow you didn't die and I didn't die and that was actually possible... We just have a whole list of disorders?"

Lyn shook her head confusedly and then blinked at the stack of documents Kurama had given her. "What the -- he changed my birth certificate!? How the -- okay, never mind the how, he's Youko, but what the heck!? I'm supposed to be able to pass for thirty-one years old!?"

"So wait, Ly -- *mom*, I have to like listen to you... obey you... and you have to take care of me... well, basically do everything but what our parents did?" Reneey sighed. "This is going to take a while to get used to..."

"Because I don't already?" Lyn asked, shrugging. "Let's face it, I had to be my own mom and you accuse me of acting like your mom half the time anyway. The big adjustment will be for you remembering not to yell 'Lynni' every two seconds and actually, you know, paying attention to what I say. Because I can't exactly do the whole cohort in randomness and insanity thing while I'm apparently legally your mom."

"Oh shit," Reneey whined. "So that means... you have the right to punish me!"