Summary- Cuddy has a miscarriage, and calls House. Will he be able to help?

Please read- this has flash backs.... the flash backs are in italics and NOT bolded.

Thanks, hope you enjoy reading and please tell me what you think!

Disclaimer- I sadly do Not own House.

Listen

"Life shouldn't be this hard" Lisa Cuddy was hugging the toilet having just spewed what seemed like a whole buffet.

"Life sucks, get over it" House didn't mean to sound callous or so blunt, but he felt this was the best advice.

He sat on the edge of the tub; towering over her small, quivering frame.

"You're the king of not dealing with your problems, why are you making me deal with mine!" she looked up and locked her tear streaked face with his.

"Because I'll never be happy", he said solemnly, "You still can be."

"How can you possibly know that?" she held his gaze for a minute before looking down into the toilet; where she felt her life was right now.

"I'm god remember" he sounded too smug for her taste.

"You're an a$$"

This all started the moment she sat up from the toilet seat spotting some red droplets in the water for the first time in three months.

"House" she dialed the first number that came to mind.

"If I'm such an a$$ then why did you call me? Why did you want me here when you could have had Wilson and his well known messiah complex?"

Why did I call him of all people? She really didn't even know where to begin to find the answer to that question. He always made her miserable, but he always told the truth. Maybe she wanted to be miserable, maybe she was no better then the man next to her.

"I don't know" she sounded meekly before heaving chunks into the toilet once more.

"Cuddy?"

"I need you to come here" He heard her gag in the back ground and couldn't control his voice that was instantly filled with worry.

"Where are you?"

"My House"

The last thing she heard was the dial tone.

"You need me" He answered the question himself

"I don't need a bstard who wants to make the people in his life miserable"

"You want it and need it. Maybe you like being miserable"

She didn't respond, she couldn't.

She heard the door bell ring from the couch in her living room, she stood wavering slightly. She was dizzy and had a massive headache from her crying and having drunk herself into trying to forget about another child she has lost. She felt guilty, she felt like she wasn't good enough. Maybe she just wasn't trying hard enough? Maybe she would fail as a mother and her body was just trying to keep that from happening. Her irrational alcohol induced mind even believed that it was her fault that her baby died. These were the thoughts she couldn't get out of her head. She tries to keep them in the back of her mind, but today she felt like the dam has finally been broken and repair was near impossible.

She opened the door to see House standing outside, she didn't see much because she immediately dug her face into his chest, seeking any kind of comfort she could get.

"I shouldn't have drunken that much" she said mainly to herself holding her head.

"Then why did you?" he asked blindly trying to get information out of this enigma of a women.

"I wanted to forget"

He handed her the towel he was holding to wipe her mouth, "How is that plan working out for you?"

She took the towel and cleaned herself off before backing up from the toilet and against the wall across from where House still sat on the edge of the tub; she bent her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them.

"I don't want to be miserable"

"Everyone is miserable, some people are just better at covering up their true misery"

"I keep failing"

"You can't control everything Cuddy, stop trying to"

"It's my fault!"

"Oh yea I'm sure it's your fault your body can't sustain life… wait that sounded better in my head"

"See It IS my fault, maybe if I had taken better care of myself I would be able to support a child"

"Now you sound like a real idiot, your in better shape that the people half your age"

"Then why can't I have children"

"Aren't you supposed to be a doctor or something like that?"

She sighed knowing she was being irrational, but she couldn't get rid of the guilt that has been eating her soul since her first miscarriage.

"I know I'm being irrational, but I feel like I'm killing my kids. I feel like my body is betraying me and I feel powerless to stop it"

He just sat their and let her vent, he really didn't know what to say to make this better.

"What do you want me to do about it?"

"I want you to listen"

So he listened, for once he did the opposite of his true character and he listened to her. She deserved him to be there for her at least once in her life time; especially after everything she has done for him.

About an hour later she finally stood up from the bathroom floor, she still felt like crap, still felt like a failure, but somehow she felt better. She doesn't exactly know what her next step should be, but she knows she can't give up. She just has to keep trying, because Jagger once said," You can't always get what you want, but if you try real hard you can get what you need"

She walked House to her front door," Thank you for coming"

"I just sat there the last hour, I didn't do anything to help you" he sounded with a sarcastic obviousness.

"Exactly, you were there"

He nodded imperceptibly and walked out mumbling an almost incoherent, "No problem"