Chapter 1: Forever No-Good

Namimori, Japan/ N University:

Snickers were heard as I was walking down the halls, which was pretty normal for me.

"Oh dear, if it isn't No Good Tsuna." It was definitely a girl's voice, and the fact that even girls pitied me definitely made my heart sting just a bit.

"I can't believe he made it to college with his less than mediocre grades."

"Wait a minute, who's Tsuna?" From the corner of my eye, I caught sight of a cute blonde girl whom I've never seen before. She probably moved to Namimori to attend school.

Her friend nudged her, and I recognized her as Yumi from my high school class from three years ago. Before I could hear what Yumi had to say, I quickly dashed out of the hallway, pushing the door open in the process as I made my way bitterly back to my apartment. I had an inkling of what Yumi was about to say to her friend about me.

He's never been popular.

His grades were always the lowest in class.

And he failed at nearly every sport in gym class.

Oh, and did I mention, he's been single for 20 years and counting!

Those things never changed for me. From the time I reached the awkward age of 14, all I did was screw up at everything. I was best known for failure, for always giving up when things got too rough for me.

Sighing, I looked up when I finally reached my apartment complex. Going up the stairs, I ran a hand through my messy, spiky hair. Grabbing the key out from my pocket, I jammed it within the lock, turning it as the door easily opened. "I'm home."

"Pfft, as if I care," rolling my eyes, I looked at my roommate with a tired expression. "Nice to see you too, Goku."

From his position on the couch, Gokudera Hayato gave me the finger as he returned his attention to the TV screen. "Don't you ever call me that again, it's Hayato."

"Exciting news, people of Namimori! The show, Mister Millionaire, is about to air HERE-"

"Do you mind turning it down?" Taking off my shoes, I made my way towards my room just as Gokudera scoffed at me and gave me another not too pleasant reply.

Gokudera was my complete opposite in several ways. He was brash and was not afraid to speak his mind. Although there are a lot of traits that make him seem rude and offensive, he also had decent traits that make up for it.

Like his good looks, popularity with women, and his intelligence. Yeah, I know, lucky bastard, right?

Shutting the door, I shook my head at my roommate's attitude. It was surprising that he had wanted to stay here to help pay the rent since there was no way in Hell I was living in the university's dorms. With more than half of the students I knew growing up attending the same college, living there was just asking for trouble.

Looking at myself in the mirror, I caught sight of my lanky body, all arms and legs with little to no muscle to support it. My hair nearly covered my eyes, making it difficult for others to see them, but I was okay with it. As I was degrading myself yet again for being the same no good self, I nearly jumped when I heard my cell ring.

Searching through my bag, I checked the caller. "Of course it would be Mom." Flipping it open, I answered. "Yeah Mom?"

"Tsuna! Oh, my darling boy, it's been so long! Your father and I miss you very much!" I nearly laughed at my mother's overreaction. The university was barely fifteen minutes away from where my parents lived, so she could have easily made the trip to see me at any time.

"Okay Mom, what is it that you want?"

I could hear her stutter a bit on her end. "W-Whatever do you mean, Tsu-kun?"

Fixing the books on my desk, I replied "I know that you have a motive for calling me. I live about 20 minutes away from you, which isn't far enough to constitute any amount of check in calls when you can easily just come and see me. So what is it that you want?"

Her giggling made me realize I was dead right. "Oh my, it seems as though you caught me, heehee." I rolled my eyes. Typical Mom answer. "And I was wondering, well…"

"Yeeeeesss?" I was getting impatient now. Just hurry up and say it!

"Do you have a girlfriend yet?" Mom's hopeful voice nearly crushed me as I was left speechless.

Taking my silence as a positive response, my mother began to gush. "Oh, dear, it's true isn't it? That's the reason why you never come to visit us!"

I began stuttering, trying to set things straight before things got out of hand, or worse. She would tell Dad, spouting that I had some girlfriend. "You should let us meet her! Like, this weekend! Then I can see how my son's life is turning around and-"

"MOM, stop!" Immediately, she stopped her crazed ranting as I was finally able to get a word in. "I don't have a girlfriend."

"Well why not?" The whining quality to my mother's voice was evident as I tried to fight off the growing throb that was residing on my temple.

"Because," I was gritting my teeth now, seeing as I had to explain this to her once again. "I'm a loser, girls find me unattractive, and-"

"Now you stop it right there, young man!" Wincing at my mom's sudden outburst, I pulled away from my phone momentarily. "As your mother, I forbid you to speak that way about yourself again! You are a handsome young man, and if you just tried, you could-"

"I could get a girl, and live happily ever after, yeah yeah." I'm not gonna lie, at this point I was really getting tired of hearing mom's same old lecture. "Listen, I gotta go study. I'll call you tomorrow."

Not giving a chance for her to reply, I hung up the phone.

Namimori/ Sawada Household:

"Oh, that boy, I swear! He makes me so frustrated sometimes!" Nana Sawada huffed as she hung up the phone.

Chuckling from the dining table, Iemitsu looked over at his wife from his newspaper. "Had a conversation with Tsuna again?"

"Yes, and he's just as stubborn as ever, just like you, Iemitsu." Frowning, she turned on the television, running a hand through her brown hair.

"Well, give that boy some time; I'm sure he'll change someday." Iemitsu merely shrugged at her annoyance, knowing that she will get over it soon.

"But honey," facing her husband, she gave him a pout. "I've been waiting for nearly 20 years for him to change now. And nothing has happened."

Letting out another laugh, the Sawada patriarch shook his head. "Then perhaps the right moment for our son hasn't come yet."

At that moment, an announcement coming from the TV caught Nana's attention. Staring at the screen, she watched as a suave male host appears on the screen. He wore a pin stripe suit that fit his perfect form and a fedora, adding to his mysteriously attractive character. He cleared his throat as he began to make an announcement for his show. "Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to inform you that the show Mister Millionaire is making its way to Namimori!"

Turning up the volume, Nana stared intently at the screen as she listened to what the man had to say. "In just a couple of more months, we will follow the life of an average Joe turned millionaire and his quest to find true love within 5 lucky ladies!"

"Auditions start next week at the Namimori Theatre. If you think you have what it takes to be the next Mister Millionaire, then come see us."

"I think Tsuna's moment has just arrived…" Nana whispered breathlessly just as Iemitsu looked at her.

"What was that, honey?"

"Nothing!" She quickly jotted down the address and number that flashed on the screen as a mischievous smile graced her lips.

~To Be Continued…

Oh Nana, you are so crazy ;D!

Hello new readers! My name is Theresa and this is my first ever story written for Katekyo Hitman Reborn! Obviously, this AU is based on all of those reality shows we know and love (sorta) called (I think) the Bachelor? Or was it something with Billionaire in it? Well, whatever it is called, this story was inspired by it!

So expect some romance, and definitely a lot of comedy for this story ;3 hope you readers will enjoy this!

I apologize for any mistakes in this story, as I do not have a beta reader for this project.

[I do not own KHR, just this plot, and please, DO NOT COPY MY WORK]

See you all in the next chapter!