'Happy Birthday Harry' Harry Potter whispered to himself. It was 12:01 on July 31st and he was sitting in his room at the Dursleys. Yeah I know, He's now 18 and he's still living with that Gawd-awful family. What an idiot. But that's not important. Anycrap, an owl was knocking on Harry's window. Harry stared at the owl cause he was stupid and forgot he was a wizard. Then he let the owl in.
"What's this?" Harry whispered.
"It's a letter from Hogwarts dumbass!" the owl screeched.
"Oh, I guess I should open it!"
"No shit Sherlock!"
Dear Mister Potter,
You have been requested to by Professor Albus Dumbledore to return to Hogwarts on September 1st. He would like to talk to you in person and feels that this important matter should not be discussed though owls. Just report to Platform 9 ¾ and ride the train like you used too. I will be there to take you to Professor Dumbledore. You should also bring a trunk of your belongings.
Sincerely,
Professor Minerva McGonagall
"Well that's odd" Harry thought. "Why would they want me back at Hogwarts? OHMIGAWD! Maybe they want me to teach! I wouldn't be surprised, I mean I did defeat Voldermort. I heard he's working at some McDonalds in a small town in southern Illinois in the USA," Harry chuckled.
"HEY! Can I get some payment here! I traveled quite a while, hey where's that owl of yours, Hedwig? Word around the bars is she's some hot crap!" the owl chimed in.
"EW! EW! Mental pictures!" Harry yelled and threw the bird some biscuits. Owl flew happily away.
Weeks went by and nothing to interesting happened to Harry. He did the things that normal teenage wizards who live in the muggle world do. He terrorized his unsuspecting neighbors! (A/N: I know I know, underage wizards can't do magic in the summer. But he doesn't know he's not done with school. And it's my story so shut up!!)
It was finally time to go to the station. Harry drove himself because he, well…can! As soon as he got to the platform, he sensed people looking at him. You see, (no you don't! You're reading! How can you be there and here at the same time! GAWD!) Harry shaved all his hair off (and I mean ALL his hair…ewwww) so everyone could see his nasty little scar. And HELLO, he just defeated Volermort, he's even more famous! (Ron: It's not fair! He gets all the attention!) Harry was used to this so he just walked onto the train.
After riding for a few minutes in his compartment, he was alone by the way, the door thingie slide open.
"OHMYMERLIN! HARRY POTTER?! I've missed you so much!" Colin Creevey yelped and jumped into Harry's lap. "What are you doing here? I thought you graduated?" Colin whipped out his camera and began taking 594,390,283,918,391,823 pictures of Harry.
"Stop it Colin! Get away from me! I'm not ready for commitment! Rubber Ducky is my one true love! That and Ginny Weasley! Where is she anyway? Orange is my favorite color. I like the number 39849329.48! I'm jewsh! Merry Chri-" Colin slapped him.
"Snap outta it man! What is wrong with you! You've sure changed. I'm leaving!" Colin ran off, wipping the tears from his sad little eyes.
"Works every time." Harry giggled softly. He soon drifted off to sleep to dream of his yellow gloshes red bike that finally got the training wheels off! "I'm a big boy now!" he sang in his dream.
"What's this?" Harry whispered.
"It's a letter from Hogwarts dumbass!" the owl screeched.
"Oh, I guess I should open it!"
"No shit Sherlock!"
Dear Mister Potter,
You have been requested to by Professor Albus Dumbledore to return to Hogwarts on September 1st. He would like to talk to you in person and feels that this important matter should not be discussed though owls. Just report to Platform 9 ¾ and ride the train like you used too. I will be there to take you to Professor Dumbledore. You should also bring a trunk of your belongings.
Sincerely,
Professor Minerva McGonagall
"Well that's odd" Harry thought. "Why would they want me back at Hogwarts? OHMIGAWD! Maybe they want me to teach! I wouldn't be surprised, I mean I did defeat Voldermort. I heard he's working at some McDonalds in a small town in southern Illinois in the USA," Harry chuckled.
"HEY! Can I get some payment here! I traveled quite a while, hey where's that owl of yours, Hedwig? Word around the bars is she's some hot crap!" the owl chimed in.
"EW! EW! Mental pictures!" Harry yelled and threw the bird some biscuits. Owl flew happily away.
Weeks went by and nothing to interesting happened to Harry. He did the things that normal teenage wizards who live in the muggle world do. He terrorized his unsuspecting neighbors! (A/N: I know I know, underage wizards can't do magic in the summer. But he doesn't know he's not done with school. And it's my story so shut up!!)
It was finally time to go to the station. Harry drove himself because he, well…can! As soon as he got to the platform, he sensed people looking at him. You see, (no you don't! You're reading! How can you be there and here at the same time! GAWD!) Harry shaved all his hair off (and I mean ALL his hair…ewwww) so everyone could see his nasty little scar. And HELLO, he just defeated Volermort, he's even more famous! (Ron: It's not fair! He gets all the attention!) Harry was used to this so he just walked onto the train.
After riding for a few minutes in his compartment, he was alone by the way, the door thingie slide open.
"OHMYMERLIN! HARRY POTTER?! I've missed you so much!" Colin Creevey yelped and jumped into Harry's lap. "What are you doing here? I thought you graduated?" Colin whipped out his camera and began taking 594,390,283,918,391,823 pictures of Harry.
"Stop it Colin! Get away from me! I'm not ready for commitment! Rubber Ducky is my one true love! That and Ginny Weasley! Where is she anyway? Orange is my favorite color. I like the number 39849329.48! I'm jewsh! Merry Chri-" Colin slapped him.
"Snap outta it man! What is wrong with you! You've sure changed. I'm leaving!" Colin ran off, wipping the tears from his sad little eyes.
"Works every time." Harry giggled softly. He soon drifted off to sleep to dream of his yellow gloshes red bike that finally got the training wheels off! "I'm a big boy now!" he sang in his dream.