More Than Enough
Summary: Of Hinata and Neji and what people live for. OneShot.
Warning: Hyuugacest.
I received a review on a totally different story hinting at the fact that the reader actually was looking for another Hinata/Neji story. I promised myself to write one – but it took time to come up with the perfect prompt. As always, it hit me right out of the blue while I was working.
Set: story-unrelated, future-fic
Disclaimer: Standards apply.
Hinata is kind.
She cannot walk past a crying child or a hurt shinobi without wanting to talk, to soothe, to heal. Sometimes she does so, on the streets of Konoha, in the forests of Hi no Kuni, even in foreign countries she and her team are sent to in order to fulfill a mission. Kurenai, Shino and Kiba have long given up on telling her not to do so. There have been many times her kindness has hurt herself, both mentally and physically. Once, a helpless child turned out to be an assassin, sent to kill the Hyuuga heiress. She protected herself well enough (and Kiba and Shino made the assassin pay dearly) but the fact that her team-mates killed a child barely twelve years old hurt her even worse than the broken arm and the slash wounds. They never saw her cry but knew she did, in her tiny little room in the Country of Tea and later in her huge bedroom in the Hyuuga mansion. Physical wounds heal but mental wounds scar worse than anything else and Hinata is full of them. Her kindness hurts herself most and yet she is unable to stop herself.
Neji, as her opposite, is cool.
He walks the streets of the village and sees beggars and orphans and injured. And he walks past them, straight on. Some people would say he is cruel, or cold-hearted, and maybe they are right. Maybe he is all that, and maybe he is a complete ass for knowing himself and not wanting to change. But this is life. People get injured and die and children grow up weeping for their parents. He doesn't feel arrogant because he knows what it feels like, having no mother, having no father, and hating the world for its cruelness. But the world doesn't change. Neji's coolness isn't protection or self-defense but rather the ability of acceptance: he has grown up as a caged bird, a bird without wings, and someone opened the doors of his cage but he has forgotten how to fly. He has started learning though, and he slowly, slowly is able to reach the skies again. But he needs time and time is what life gives or doesn't give. He is no different than any other people, as hurt, as lost, and he lives with it as much as they do. His coolness is a shield that hurts others, instead, but he is unable to stop himself.
Hinata is strong.
Strong because she gets up every time she falls. She has had a great teacher, and Naruto always will be her first love, one of her best friends and her greatest idol. She is strong because she gives contra in her own way, quietly, politely, patiently. Some people mistake it for defiance and weakness. Some people see her as a weak-minded person without any strength. But how wrong they are! Kiba, Shino, Kurenai, Naruto, Neji – they all are a testament to Hinata's strength. In her own way, she has changed every single one of them: she has made a team out of three loners, she has given Kurenai a gift with her feelings and her trust, has shown Naruto that she believes in him and Neji that he is more than just a caged bird or a tool. And she has learned to fight. Strangely, the traditional Hyuuga style isn't what she is good in. No, Neji and his imperfect replica and perfect development of the Hyuuga techniques is who is the master of this special style. Hinata has developed her own style and no technique is more qualified to be called gentle fist. Her touch can kill. Neji's can, too, of course, but not gently, softly, almost like the touch of a butterfly's wing. Hinata dances on water where everyone else walks across the surface clumsily. She moves like the wind, an incorporation of lethality, and yet – she does not revel in killing. She knows when it is necessary but she doesn't like it.
Neji is determined.
His determination is seen in the way he talks, walks and thinks. It shines from his eyes which are cool and silvery white and never betray his emotions. Not even his face does so but, instead, shows nothing else but raw determination. Some people call it a mask, something that hides his true feelings. Mostly, they have romantic intentions and want to believe there is more behind his cloudy, cold eyes than appears to be. Tenten, Lee, Gai, Naruto and Hinata know there isn't, but that is okay. That is the way he is. Neji is a walking enigma, a rather unfriendly person, someone one doesn't associate much with because he grows tired of talking to normal people or they grow angry at his attitude. Or both. But whatever he starts he brings to the end. He never backs down. He never gives up. And mostly he gets what he wants, like he got Hinata. In his determination he sometimes fails to see that it isn't only his will that propels him forward but other aspects, as well. Like Hinata's denial to marry a rich branch-family member of the Hyuuga. Like Naruto's promise to change the clan. Like Tenten's sacrifice in which she let go of him and Lee's friendship that gave him strength and fire. Sometimes, when he deigns to think of what his life has become, he realizes all of this. His pride, though, never lets him thank them openly.
Hinata is kind and strong.
But she is fragile, too, and too compassionate and too patient. She hurts herself rather than hurting others and threatens to break far too often even though she denies it. She works herself down to the bone, both with training, medical school and the work for her clan, and she refuses to let others do her work. She cannot pass a working person without offering her help and doesn't stop until it is all finished. She tends to give in in favor of others and to sacrifice herself for others. She just cannot refuse a request and that makes her vulnerable, even more so than she already is. She can defend herself against enemies but she cannot defend herself against mankind. And yet she lives for her friends, her family, her village and even her enemies. She lives and gives kindness, strength and love to the world, more than anyone else (except for Naruto, maybe), and that is what she lives for.
Neji is cool and determined.
But he is stubborn, too, and too headstrong and too impatient. He doesn't like to take orders (later, far in the future, he'll only take them from one man alone) and his pride makes him cold and cruel even though he doesn't want to see it. He rarely gives in to others and treats his surroundings like a prince treats his subordinates: coolly and detachedly. That way he secludes himself, makes himself a social outcast and distances himself from his generation and his friends. He prefers to work alone (though he, Tenten and Lee make a good team after years of shared training) and never hesitates to show this. And he longs to be a part of the Konoha Rookie Eleven but as hard as he tries he never seems to be able to fit in. The only person that accepts him fully and entirely the way he is is Hinata and she is who he lives for. He lives for her kindness and her belief in him, her trust and her smile. Her eyes see right through him in the way nobody else can (except for Naruto, maybe) and she is who he lives for.
Hinata cannot keep herself from shattering.
Neji cannot show his love for the people that are important to him.
It doesn't matter.
Hinata has more than enough love for both of them, and Neji can protect them both.