Explanation for such a hideous display of my fucked-up mind: Volume two, bitch. It's a code!?

Yo, Dude: Any suggestions for my next victim...Ahem! I mean character.

10 Ways to annoy the Hell out of: L
Volume Two

Way 1: Call him by every other letter of the alphabet but L. Example: "Hey, R, pass me that cake!" "It's L." "That's what I said, Z! Now gimme that cake!" "It's L" "Of course it is, W."

Way 2: Steal his cake, or any other sweets he has on him. As you eat it in front of him, be sure to make exaggerated noises of pleasure, since it tastes sooooo good. If he tries to retrieve it, dodge it and stuff, and threaten to take away his toys. (Toys; AKA his computer and stuff?)

Way 3: Call him a raccoon or Panda-chan instead of Ryuzaki or L. If he tells you to stop, look at him with a frown and say cutely, "But…E….it is your name…." Or something along those lines. You can't not be cute, or else it won't work.

Way 4: 'Accidentally' drop your strawberry in his lap. Casually poke your fork around to retrieve it, but take extra-long to get it. Once you do, pop it in your mouth and grin, and exclaim, "Mmmm, that's some good stuff!" Optional; 'accidentally' stab south-bound (Ahem, you know what I mean.) and laugh when he shouts in pain.

Way 5: Talk in chat speak, and when not in chat speak, speak in a high-pitch valley girl accent. Example: "Omg, A, like, lol you totally told that Kira guy off. Lol, brb I g2pee!" "………….-blink, blink-"

Way 6: This one is simple; run to L dramatically and explain that you're in love with him in deep detail, mocking how L talks sometimes. If he responds to your feelings by also loving you, get creeped out and say, "Ew, R, you're not my type. You old pervert." If he doesn't, and rejects you, stat sobbing loudly and telling everyone "T is a heartless ass hole," and tell them you hope Kira kills him.

Way 7: Bring him some sleeping pills, and put them on his desk. "Hey S, take these. It'll help you sleep, and get that mascara off your eyes. Oh excuse me, I mean shadows." If he refuses, sneak them into his cake or tea.

Way 8: Barge in and scream, "I AM KIRA! HEAR ME ROAR!"

Way 9: When hes not looking, and his back is to you, take your pointer finger and slowly stroke down his spine. Who knows how he'll react?

And Finally…

Way 10: Say the following lines, word-for-word. "Hey Y, Some guy called Kira called. He wanted to talk to you." When he asks what you said to him, look clueless and say, "Why, I told him about how you're trying to hunt him down, and how cute you are. And I told him about that time you tripped on that soap bar in the bathroom, and about how you're married to me and we have ten kids. Oh! And he asked your real name." When L asks if you told him, roll your eyes and say, "Duh. It would be bad manners not to."

DISCLAIMER: I am not responsible for any murders/injuries/restraining orders that this fictional character may inflict upon you if you try this.

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