Stay With Me
"I want to be with you, it is as simple, and as complicated as that."
Charles Bukowski
Slowly and quietly i started opening my eyes. The nightmare i had was still present on my mind, but it vanished when i saw him by my side.
His hair was messy, his chest was naked and his eyes were lost in a place or a thought i would never know about.
- Are you alright?- i asked him doubtfully. My voice interrumpted what was going on in his head. His body freezed and his eyes gave me a confused look.
- What?- Malfoy said in his cocky and arrogant voice while his hands tighten Above the grey and silky bed sheet.
- I asked you if you were okay... If you need to talk about anything dont hesitate to call me. We can grab a coffee and...
- i know what you said Granger. And no, i dont need your words... I thought we agreed not to talk. Skip the nonsense chitchat and go straight to our...
- Sexual relationship. Yes, i know, i know- i answered tired and bored about the same conversation over and over. - I just... I just wanted to...
- Granger...- Started Malfoy. He knew exactly what,without words, i wanted to tell him. He didnt want to face it, but i couldnt handle it anymore.
- Guess its true Malfoy...im no good at a one night stand... It took me 6 months to figure it out- i confessed slowly as if i was telling it to myself as well- These nights never seem to go to plan...
- Look, You are mistaken and confused...- He started saying, but i had to stop him right away. I couldnt listen to any more lies
- No im not. I ve tried to convince myself, but i cannot fight towards what i feel
- Its just an Ilussion, Granger. You may feel that, but its your mind playing sick and
fucked up games.
- Draco... I still need love cause im just a girl- and with those words, i set free the feelings i had inside me. Tears ran down my face and thoughts bombarded every corner of my head.
His answer never seemed to come. He was paler than usual, and his blue eyes showed uncertainty and solicitude.
- Im sorry Hermione. I cant give you what you want- and with that said, he stood up and started to get dressed.
- you hypocrite- i whispered while standing up. Emotions covered me from head to toe and i could not think clearly.
- Say that to my face- Draco said turning around brutally, now facing me, with his face so close to mine i could feel his warm breath.
- To which of the two?
Draco didnt answered. He sighed, looked down and kept on dressing himself.
He didnt say a word, as if i wasnt important or valuable enough.
As if my opinion didnt mattered. As if my thoughts didnt mattered. As if my feelings didnt mattered.
- Arent you going to talk to me, now?- i shouted, after a few minutes of his silence. Little by little i started losing myself. Feeling powerless and stupid.
He didnt answered. He kept on freshing himself.
I sat by the corner of the bed, sighed and kept on crying until memories became clear and words were easy to say- Do you remember t-that time when you protected me from those boys? Or that time when we walked near the woods? Or even that time when you waited me outside the three broomsticks all afternoon. In those moments i felt what you are convinced you cannot give me...
Draco stoped moving. I only saw his back, but his whole body stilled.
- This aint love, its clear to see
His words were like a stab in my heart.
Why was i so emotional?
I didnt looked good. i tried to gain some self control, but how could you if your heart was shattered into a million pieces?
Draco saw me and whispered in a sad and kind voice: im sorry.
And with that said, he started moving towards the door.
- D-draco wait!- i said with a craked and worn out voice- wont you... Stay with me? Please, you are all i need...
Draco turned around and stood near me. His face was something i could not figure it out. Sorrow? Fear? Concern?
- Hermione, deep down we both know this n-never works- he said kindly with compassion in his eyes
- well, could you lay down with me so it doesnt hurt?- i said pulling away my tears and feeling my breath speedup
Draco gave me a small, sincere and kind smile. One ive never seen appear from his face. He came closer to me, gave me a sweet kiss on my forehead, and placed his hand gently on my hip. I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes.
None of us knew exactly what felt for the other. And neither did we know what could hap
pen in a near future.
We only knew that differences didnt divide us,They brought us closer.
And what looked like a crazy and nonsense relationship, was, in fact, the begginning of an exiting and beautiful journey.