Peter Griffin was sitting in his den looking very gloomy on this Saturday afternoon. Brian, the family dog walked into the room. Brian was very smart and his intelligence was better then any of the Griffins that were over the age of 2.
Brian: Hey what's the matter Peter?
Peter: Eh nothing Brian. I've just been feeling really depressed since Lois and the kids went on vacation. It's not my fault that I got kicked out of Disney!
Brian: You pushed kids to get to the front of the line at the spinning cups and then broke the machine.
Peter: Well, they should really put a weight limit on those things.
Brian: They did. It was no one over 200 pounds.
Peter: Whatever. I'm gunna go for a drive.
Peter walks out of the room and goes outside into his car. He drives around until he sees the local mini mart. He goes inside to get beer and when he walks out he sees some mysterious man. The man looked pretty poor and was walking towards Peter.
Mystery Man: Hey you.
Peter looks at the man and points to himself
Mystery Man: Yea you. You look like someone that's been down in the dumps. What's bothering you.
Peter: Well my family left me home while they went on vacation and I miss them and there's nothing to do.
The man pulls something out of his pocket. It's a syringe.
Mystery Man: Well this stuff right here will make all your troubles go away.
Peter: What the hell is that!?
Mystery Man: Its Oxycotton.
Peter: Oxy-what?
Mystery Man: Oxycotton. Y'know oxy 80's, hillbilly heroin, or its also known as poor mans heroin.
Peter: Sorry sir but I don't do anything with needles.
The man puts the syringe away.
Mystery Man: See the beauty of oxycotton is that it can be taken in tablet form too. Here take just a few, on me and let me know how you like it.
The man hands Peter 5 small tablets.
Mystery Man: If you need some more, you'll know where to find me.
The man starts walking away and we see him now starting to go up to more people and trying to sell it. Peter looks down at his hand and realizes that this man has just given him drugs. Peter put the tablets in his pocket and for the next two days he forgot all about them.
Lois and the kids came home on Monday with tons of goodies. They all said hello to there father and then went up to there rooms because school was starting the next day. On Tuesday Peter was putting some clothes away when the tablets fell out of his pants pocket that he had put it in on that Saturday afternoon. Since nobody but Brian was home Peter finally decided to try it thinking that it would have no effect on him since he wasn't depressed anymore.
Boy was he wrong. He felt weak like he couldn't get up. And when he could get up he ran to the bathroom to vomit. For the rest of the afternoon Peter just layed on his bed itching himself and tried holding in his vomit.
Later on that night the kids, Chris Stewie and Meg, were all sitting around the kitchen table waiting for dinner that there mother was making. There mother put the pot roast that they were making on the table and sat down to join her three kids.
Lois: So how was your first day of school kids?
Meg: Mine was great I met some new people and my teachers are-
Lois cutting Meg off: That's wonderful honey but let someone else talk for once.
Meg looked disappointed at upset because she was always the black sheep of the family.
Chris: My day was pretty fun. I have a crazy story to tell you. One of my teachers takes your shoe if you need to borrow a pen.
Lois looks shocked and confused and asks Chris: Um why would he take your shoe?
Chris: I have no idea. It's something about how you need your shoe to live or something. And he wants us to have a project in by the end of this week but he knows I can't because I told him about how I need to visit my sick cousin this week but he doesn't care and says 'you need it in by the end of the week'
Lois: What class is this?
Chris: Health.
Lois starts laughing. In between laughs she says: Wow I find it ironic how a health teacher doesn't care about other people's health.
Everybody starts laughing and Peter starts walking into the dining room looking very tired, confused and sick.
Lois: Well don't worry bout it Chris. Anybody can teach health. I mean, we've all known not to take drugs since we were little. Isn't that right Peter?
Peter looks around as everyone's staring at him. He's still itching himself and looks very confused.
Peter: Wh-what are you talking about? I didn't take any drugs!
Peter starts to stand up to walk out feeling very angered.
Lois: Peter calm down we didn't say you were.
Lois looks at Peter.
Lois: Are you feeling okay your looking a little out of it.
Peter: Y-yea I'm fine I just need to lay down for a little while y'know. I have been running around all day long.
Peter starts walking upstairs as Lois says: You've been laying down the whole day!
Peter walks to his room looking for the oxycotton pills and realizes that he had already taken all five of them. Peter runs down the stairs and out the door ignoring what Lois is yelling to him. Peter drives down to the market where he first saw the drug dealer. And starts walking around the building looking for him but doesn't see him anywhere. From behind him he hears a voice.
Voice: I thought I'd find you hear.
Peter gets excited as he turns around hoping to see the mysterious man. When he turns around he sees Brian standing right near him.
Peter: How did you know I'd be here?
Brian: I took a walk that Saturday and saw you out hear and I knew something was going on. How long have you been doing this Peter?
Peter: The other day was my first time I swear.
Brian: Don't you know what oxycotton can do to you?
Peter slowly shakes his head looking disappointed at himself.
Brian: You can become an addict. Dependant on this stuff. Do you really want to waste all your money on this crap? You can have heart infections and can get liver and kidney diseases. Why did you start doing this anyway?
Peter: The guy just saw me and he could tell I was depressed. He told me this would make me feel better.
Brian yells in disbelief: And you believed him?! This stuff kills hundreds of people everyday. You think your going to feel good when you get muscle spasms and insomniac?
Peter shakes his head still looking disappointed in himself.
Brian feeling upset because of how he's talking to his friend: Peter I'm sorry for being so hard on you its just that before I was friends with you I knew people that dabbled in this stuff a few times. Most of those 'friends' aren't around anymore and I didn't want you to be another one.
Peter: I know Brian. Thanks to you I didn't go out of control with this stuff. I just got one question for you.
Brian: What's that?
Peter: What ever happened to that guy?
Brian: I came her yesterday looking for him to confront him and saw him laying down on the side of the building. I called an ambulance and they told me he died from an overdose of oxycotton. He became so addicted to it that he eventually took too much and died.
Peter looks at Brian at disbelief and finally realizes what he's saying.
Peter: Wow. I'm glad that I didn't become like that.
They start walking toward Peters car.
Brian: Yea, I'll say. Now you got to promise me one thing.
Peter: What's that?
Brian: That you wont try oxycotton ever again.
They get into Peters car and start thing engine.
Peter: Ok. Umm what about marijuana?
Brian saying sarcastically: Haha very funny. I'm glad you see the humor in all this.
Peter: Well someone's got to be the comic relief in this crappy story.
And they drive off towards home.