You Don't See Me
Characters belong to SEGA.
This is the place were I sit. This is the part were I love you too much. Is this is a hard as it gets? 'Cause I'm getting tired of pretending I'm tough.
"Sonic!" I called out, once again chasing my blue hero. It was an all too normal day for me. I knew all too well I was chasing something that could never be truly caught. It was something I never wanted to admit. I had been running for what seemed like hours on end. All that could now be heard was the bottom of my boots thumping lightly against the dirt ground. I was now running through what seemed like a forest far out from the city area. I had followed my hero out here, obviously not paying attention to the pathway. He was nowhere in sight, he had disappeared once again, with the wind. I sighed in defeat, it was days like today which I sometimes wondered why I even bother trying to chase after him, he obviously didn't want spend time with me, he think I would tie him down, stop him from living his dream, even though that was never my intention. I wouldn't ask so much of him, I wouldn't request him to give up something he loves so much. It was just plain selfish.
I scanned the area around me, hoping by that some miracle he would still be, but who was I kidding? He could be half way across the country by now. There was no way a free spirit such as him could be kept at a still. Especially by a girl such as me. If anything, I'm pretty sure he thought of me as an annoyance, some silly little fan girl that simply followed him around, getting herself into trouble and then having to risk his own life to save her.
I'm here if you want me. I'm yours you can hold me. I'm empty and taking and tumbling and breaking.
After giving up my impossible mission of catching the fastest thing alive, I had realised I had no idea where I exactly was. Not being bothered enough to even try figuring a way out of this forest, I walked over towards the closest tree and leaned against it before sliding down and sitting on the floor with my back against the tree. I thought of all the events that unfolded earlier in the morning. Sometimes I think chasing Sonic was a hopeless cause, it was never going to work out. I know that I had always promised myself that I would't give up, that I would stick by him forever. But what good is it if he doesn't appreciate it? I was still young, I still had my whole life ahead of me. Maybe it was time I started thinking of myself a little. Sonic had plenty of fan girl, I'm sure there was someone out there who could satisfy him much more than I ever could.
The only thing I could do no, was asking him personally. I had meaning to earlier this morning, but of course, at the mere sight of me, he ran off, again. Was I really that bad? That he simply ran off by just catching a glimpse of me. I don't think he ever understood the real reason I had loved him. I wasn't in love with him because of his fame or heroism. I fell for him for his amazing personality, for him himself. He has this caring factor, the way he just always made life seem to carefree. The whole room seemed to light up as soon as he walked inside, he was just this amazing person, which he obviously didn't seem himself as. He had a way of making everyone feel good, bringing joy everywhere he went. If only he could see that. If only he could think of me or see me as something more than just a mere fan girl.
'Cause you don't see me and you don't need me, and you don't love me, the way I wish you would, the way I know you could.
"Amy?" I heard a familiar voice ask. I turned my head in the direction of the voice, looking at the person standing just a few meters beside me. "What are you doing all the way out here by yourself?" he asked.
"I-I was sort of, chasing after you and.. got a little lost" I mumbled, a small blush appearing on my muzzle. He probably thought I was just an absolute idiot. I had managed to get lost in the middle of nowhere while chasing after him.
He let out a small sigh, shaking his head slowly while taking small steps towards me. Finally reaching my side, he also slumped down against the tree I was also leaning on. "What are we going to do with you Ames?". I let a small smile tug against my lip before fading away quickly. "You know you really shouldn't be chasing after me in such a place, you could off gotten hurt".
"I know" I muttered, "But I just, really wanted to talk to you, but you sort of ran off before I could tell you"
"Well I'm here now, so, whats up?" he asked casually.
"Sonic, I just want you to answer me this, do you love me?" I got straight to the point, not giving him any chance to back away now. His eyes widened and the turned his head away from me slightly, before turning back and looking straight at me.
"Look Ames, I know that you might think of me as something more, but, wouldn't we be better of as just friends?"
"I just need you to answer my question, Sonic" I paused slightly before once again repeating myself, "Do you love me?"
He just look at me, he was quite, as if he was debating with himself in his head. He let out a deep breath before replying, "No".
I dream a world where you understand, that I dream a million sleepless nights. But I dream a fire when you're touching my hands, but it twists into smoke when I turn on the lights.
No. Of course, well what were you expecting Amy, a proposal? You were right all along, he doesn't think much of you..
"But hey, we can still be friends, right Ames?" he asked, breaking the silence between us.
Friends? Really Sonic, is that all you can come up with. Oh I wish how much this hurts right now. But I guess, friends is always better than nothing. But who am I kidding, no matter how long I stick around here, even if were are just merely friends, there is no way in the world that I would be able to stop loving you.
"S-sure Sonic, friends" I lied. There was no way this could ever work. He would be too involved in his own life to even bother with me.
"Come on Ames, let me take you home, you feel better after you have some sleep, you look a little worn out" he said, taking my hand and pulling me up of the ground. He then carefully lifted me into his arms in a bridal style before breaking into a small job. I could feel the wind brushing against me face as he started to accelerate. Usually I was ecstatic at the thought of being in his arms, but this time around, I felt, almost lost, even empty. If anything, I didn't want to be in his arms because of such a circumstance. I knew he was doing this all out of pity for me, almost like a one time thing, before he went back to his old usual ways of ignoring me and running at the mere sight of me. I could feel the tears beginning to well up in my eyes, threatening to fall down my face. I tried my hardest not to cry, especially not in front of Sonic, haven't I already done enough of that?
I'm speechless and faded, it's too complicated. Is this how the book ends, nothing but good friends?
It had only been a matter of minutes before we had reached the front of my all too well known house. He was closer a few more steps with me in his arms before setting me down on my feet. I stumbled at first, but caught my footing. After stabilising myself, I turned back towards Sonic, "Thanks" I murmured.
"Anytime Ames" I winced a little at the nickname he had come up for me. None except Sonic ever called me that, it was like his personal nickname for me. "Will you be alright?"
What kind of question is that? Did he really have to ask that? He doesn't understand..
"I'll deal with it" I said, almost a little harshly, even thought I didn't mean it in that kind of way. I gave a small smile and turned my heel and began walking towards the front door of my house. I was suddenly stopped, an hand grabbing my arm securely.
"Ames" he whispered, "How about, you and me, just hang out some time tomorrow? Just as friends of course, what do you say? Maybe it will help you feel better"
"I-I'm sorry, Sonic. But, I don't think that would be the best thing, right now. Maybe, another day?"
"Sure Ames, I'll, come check on you tomorrow"
"Thanks" I said quietly, I pulled myself out of his grip and began walking away once again, this time, with no one stopping me.
"I'm sorry" I heard him say, it was barley audible. But I didn't turn around to ask why, I didn't want to give him another chance of making this any harder than it already was. I just continued walking.
I opened the door to my house and walked inside closing the door behind me without another glance backwards. I heard what sounded like a big gush of wind, realising the blue blur himself would have taken off by now, my knees suddenly buckled out from underneath my causing me to fall forward onto the ground. I couldn't hold back the tears any longer. Burying my head in my hands, I sat there on the floor, releasing all my sorrow, pain, everything. I was just letting it all out.
I already knew the answer before I asked him, I predicted he would have said no, but of course that didn't make it any harder than it already was. Maybe this was something I needed to hear, especially from him, maybe this was what I needed him to tell me to help me move on, the prove to myself that this was only one sided love. It wouldn't work out between us, love was a two way road, both people needed to be willing to make this work, but Sonic just wasn't. I had spent years proclaiming my love for him, if that wasn't enough to show him, then I was afraid nothing was. I gave him the chances he needed, to take them, but he wasn't willing.
'Cause you don't see me, and you don't need me, and you don't love me, the way I wish you would, the way I know you could.
I wasn't needed in his life, I didn't have to be in it to make him happy. He would be fine without me. Why could I say the same thing for myself? Why couldn't I say to myself that I would be perfectly fine without him. Maybe that was just exactly what I needed to do, some time away from here would do me good. A new start on life, away from all these old memories. There were of course those things that I would never forget, my wonderful friends that would always make me feel better, who were always there for me when needed. The was a city, not too far from here. The more I thought of moving away for a while, the better I thought the idea was. I had my whole life ahead of me, and I was willing to do anything to change it, to make it the life I deserved. I would meet new people, there were pliantly more people I could possibly fall in love with. I would eventually meet someone new, my feelings would slowly develop for them, I would love them and they would love me back as well. It would be the kind of love I have been dreaming of my whole life. It would be perfect, magical.
This is the place in my heart. This is the place where I'm falling apart, isn't this just where we met? And is this the last chance that I'll ever get?
Maybe this really was the best for me. I slowly but carefully looking around my house, taking everything in. If that's would I had to do to get rid of this pain and these feelings, then that is exactly what I would do. I carefully picked myself up off the ground and dragged my feet over to the stair case carefully stepping up and over to the room of the end on it. Opening the cupboard door, I pulled out a small bag, enough room to fit stuff that I really needed to take with me. If I was planning to start over new, then I might as well start over completely. It was better than taking things that were needed and ended up holding me back.
I scavenged through my wardrobe, picking out a few sets of clothing to last me for a few days, then also packing a few necessities. Anything that could be deemed useful and helpful was packed. Any money that I had was placed in my wallet which was now also packed. I walked over to the small corner desk in my room pulling out a sheet of paper and a pen. I placed myself on the seat in front of it and began writing. It was a small note to someone who I would have to explain this whole thing to. He deserved that much at least. I didn't care if he just threw this away or regarded it as nothing, he could do what he wanted with my explanation, as long as it was here and he knew. It wouldn't matter if he wasn't sad or was even happy that I had finally left, because this was the whole reason I was getting away from here in the first place, to not care about him. I would be long gone before he read this anyway.
Once I was done with everything. I picked up my stuff and the note and walked out the door, locking it behind me. I carefully placed the note in the wedge of the door for whoever would come buy, they would most likely end up giving it to him. And if they didn't, well that was just too bad then.
I wish I was lonely, instead of just only crystal and see through and not enough to you
After watching her enter her house and close her door behind her, I sped away, I couldn't bare seeing her so torn up, especially about something I said. Maybe that wasn't the answer I should have said. I should have said 'yes', but I just couldn't make myself. I could put her in danger because of me. I know that she didn't know this and it was probably the last thing she was expecting, but I do love her, I really do. But I wasn't prepared to risk her safety over this. She was enough of a target already as it was, what if proclaimed my love for her? Wouldn't that just be the catch my enemies would be looking for? They would use her against me, use her to get to me. I wouldn't be able to ever forgive myself if she got hurt, or even worse, killed because of someone wanting to get through to me. I hesitated with the answer, a yes almost slipping out of my mouth, but I just managed. But it made me feel sick, completely guilty playing with her feelings like that. She deserved better, better than someone like me. She could get almost any man with her looks, I saw how they all looked at her, it did make me I guess almost jealous in a way, but why me? What would she ever find so amazing about me? I was a jerk to her, even though it was to protect her, she didn't know the truth. I barley ever gave her any attention, even though I so desperately wanted to spend time with her, just us two, holding hands, walking through the park, everything being about us, I just could't do it, put her in so much danger like that, let anyone take advantage of her.
You've hurt her, you should've just told her the truth, you've broken her heart once again, what kind of a hero are you?
It doesn't matter, as long as it keeps her safe. Better her heartbroken than dead.
You know you can protect her, why the worry now?
There are worse people out there than just Eggman. What if something happens to her, and I'm too late? What then?
Since when has the fastest thing alive ever been 'too slow' to save someone? You know as well as anyone that you are perfectly capable of protecting her. You're just scared, you're scared of letting her in. This could be the best thing that has ever happened to you, take a chance, since when have you ever hesitated about taking chances? Wouldn't it make you happy to have her by your side? It would definitely make her happy, probably her whole life.
She won't take me back, not after today. She thinks I hate her. She probably won't want to ever see my face again.
Then make it up to her, tell her how you really feel. Do you really want to go on your whole life and then regret not acting when you had the chance to?
I guess, in a way you are right. Wow, this is really sad, arguing with my own conscience.. But, in a way you've helped me see things I would have never done myself.
"I'll make her mine, I can protect her. I have to tell her the truth" I smiled to myself
'Cause you don't see me and you don't need me, and you don't love me, the way I wish you would, the way I know you could.
Today is the day I thought to myself. The day I would go and tell Amy Rose the truth, the truth about everything, especially how I felt. I knew that whatever I had said yesterday would have highly upset her, I could only hope that she would forgive me about everything. And if she didn't, then I would live in regret of the chances I threw away. She had meant more to me than anything and I could even tell her than. The fear inside of me preventing me of doing do, I hated feeling so weak. The amount of faith she always showed in me was unbelievable, she was always by my side and now, if she accepts, I could be by hers to. I was selfish in the past, unable to show such commitment to her, but that was all about to change, I was willing to do anything for her. Even though she didn't know it yet, I wouldn't know what to do with my life if anything had happened to her. I never meant to keep my feelings such a secret, I had just hoped that she would eventually get over these feelings for me and find someone who could give her everything she wanted, a normal life, being able to be with her freely without the thought of her being in danger or the fact that he could be called away at any second.
I took me a matter of mere seconds to reach my destination, Amy Roses's house. I had made a quick pit stop before this. In my hang I was holding a single red rose. Hoping that it would help her cheer up even just that little bit. I hated seeing her as sad as I made her yesterday, especially when I myself was the one causing it all. I walked up to the front door, knocking on it a few times before taking a deep breath in, waiting for her to open the door. There was no answer, I knocked again, maybe she didn't hear it the first time. After waiting a couple minutes, I accepted the fact that she wasn't home. Just as I was about to leave, I spotted a small piece of paper which was on the floor. I picked it up opened it.
Dear Sonic, ..It was addressed to me?
I'm sorry that I left like this, without a proper goodbye. But I just had to go. Please don't try to find me, by the time you have read this I will most likely have been long gone. Don't take it personally, I had to get away from everything here. I needed to get over everything that has ever happened between us, this is better for the both of us, trust me. You can now live your life without having to worry I'll be after you or follow you around. I'm sure you have lots of fun, especially on the many adventures of yours. I enjoyed having you in my life, you were one of the most amazing people I had ever met and you most likely always will be. Please tell the others I'm sorry. You should all get on with your lives, because that is what I will do.
Enjoy your freedom Sonic, but remember, freedom is double edged sword, be careful what you do with it. Take care, and I hope you live your life to the fullest. We may meet again one day, but there are no promises.
~Amy Rose. x
I could do anything but stare at the piece of paper in my hands. I continued to read it again and again, processing what was happening in my head. No! She could have gone! I didn't want her to leave.
What have I done? I should have just been honest yesterday! I didn't care that she chased me around, to be honest, I loved those little things she did that made her, herself. She can't be gone! I dropped the piece of paper and rose where I was standing. Quickly, I sped off into the distance. I had to search for her, I didn't care if she didn't want to be found, I will find her, even it takes me forever.
I had searched all the places I could have thought she may have been, the towns, the malls, the parks, but nothing. She was nowhere to be found. If she really didn't want to be found, knowing Amy, she could have even planned to go to another country or something!
That's it! I sped off once again, my next destination, the airport.
'Cause you don't see me and you don't need me, and you don't love me, the way I wish you would, the way I know you could.
I barged through the front doors of the airport. It massive. I looked around scanning the area looking for anything pink. But with the amount of people that were currently here, that was showing to be difficult. She couldn't have possible gone anywhere just yet. Most flights didn't leave till later in the day. I rushed through, making sure I checked throughout all the terminals of the building. I didn't there was an area I didn't check. Maybe.. Maybe she already left. I sat down on one of the seats placing my head in my heads in disappointment.
Dammit Amy! Why did you have to leave! ..I didn't mean what I said yesterday..
I let out a deep sigh, I bit my bottom lip to help prevent myself from sobbing. I just sat there, not having the will to even get up. This whole thing, Amy leaving, was all my fault, all because I couldn't over my insecurities and admit my feelings to her. What would I tell the others? They would hate me now, especially Cream. I drove away her best friend.
I forced myself to sit up, I leaned backwards into the chair, trying to regain my thoughts. Damn. What a hero I was. I couldn't sit here moping any longer. Lazily, I picked myself up of the seat and turned around to head towards the exit until a small familiar pink being came into view. Suddenly, hope filled me, she hadn't left yet!
"Ames!" I called out trying to get her attention. But she kept walking, heading into one of the terminals. Oh no, she's leaving! I rushed after her.
"Amy!" I called out once again, still to no avail.
I dashed, swerving around people before finally stopping right in front of her, startling her slightly. She looked up at me. Her eyes rimmed with red and puffy from crying. She looked as if she hadn't slept the night before, her face filled with tear stains. I felt much more guilt than I did before seeing her in such a state.
"Ames" I whispered, "Please, don't go"
She looked up at me, meeting my eyes, "Why? I thought you didn't care" she murmured, her voice barley audible.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything I said yesterday, it was a lie"
"Look Sonic, If you are just going to act like this for today to keep me here then go back to you normal hab-" I cut her off halfway through her sentence by pressing my lips against hers in a sweet but passionate kiss. Surprisingly, she didn't pull away as I expected her to. I let my hands wonder down to her waist wrapping her in my arms and pulling her closer to me. I didn't want to let her go, she felt so perfect here in my arms, where she belonged. I couldn't let her get away. When air became an issue, we eventually pulled apart.
"I-I .."
"Shh" I said placing my index finger on her lips, "Don't say anything, just come with me, come back home, please? I want you here with me. I swear to you, I didn't mean that to say no, the answer to you question, honestly, is yes. I do love you, I always have. I'm sorry, so sorry I didn't admit it earlier. I couldn't admit it, I was scared Ames"
"Why were you scared? That I would deny you your freedom?"
"No, it, wasn't exactly that"
"Good, because you know I wouldn't make you, ever, stop what you loved doing. That would be just too selfish of me"
"I appreciate that Ames, I really do! But the real reason, was I was scared of your safety. I couldn't care for you to be with me and have someone use you against me to get to me. I could put you in so much danger, what if something happened to you? I wouldn't be able to ever forgive myself!"
I just stared at her, her beautiful green eyes bearing down into my own. I didn't think confessing such a thing could lift such a weight of my shoulders. It felt good, right.
"Is that why? Sonic, why were you scared of such a thing? You are always there, always, when I need you, what made you think this would ever be any different?"
"What if I was too slow this time Amy? What if I couldn't save you, I couldn't live my life without you here beside me!" I stated.
"But you won't be, trust me, you're Sonic the Hedgehog, fastest thing alive, you couldn't be too slow even if you tried!" I chuckled slightly at her remark, but it was true. I would always be there to save her, no matter when, even if it meant running to the other side of the planet to save her. I would protect her with my life.
Then, I said the only thing I could possibly think of to make this whole thing even more perfect than it already way, I said what she had always wanted to hear from me "I love you".
With that, I picked her up and sped out, heading back home, were it could be just me and her.
Thanks for reading! Song: "You Don't See Me (Feat. Pussycat Dolls) - Josie"
This is my first ever story on this website, so please review?{: