As I hear the last beat of ''Bulletproof'', I reach for my headphones, content with my new mix. My headphones touch the surface of my desk when I hear a knock on my door. I rise from my chair and walk to the door, opening them.
''Hey, stacking buddy! Whatcha doin'?'' I see the one and only Jesse Swanson walking past me and taking a seat on my bed.
''Sure, you can come in, go for it!'' I reply sarcastically.
''You busy?'' He asks, completely ignoring my comment. I look over to him, sitting on my bed and for the first time I catch myself thinking I could get used to this, having him around all the time. Those thoughts let my feelings surface and I stop before I can start thinking about what I want and what will never happen. Leave it there, I think, even if you feel that way, he doesn't, he'll leave as soon as he can. So I decide to test my thoughts.
''Yeah, I'm busy, very busy, so it would be good if you leave. Bye!'' I say pushing him from the bed, and yes, I know I shouldn't have done that because any sane person would leave, but he's Jesse and if he wants to stay he definitely will, I just doubt it.
''What are you doing that's keeping you so busy, maybe I can help and then we could spend some time together.'' Ok, maybe he wouldn't leave, but that still doesn't mean he feels that way. He does try to flirt with me, I just try ignoring it. So I make a decision, if he tries to make a move, accept it. Go for it. Be fun for once. Don't shut him out, heartbreaks happen, go for it. The crazy part of my brain takes over with some help from my heart. Ok, so I'll go for it.
''I was mixing music until you came.'' I say waiting for a reply.
''Can I hear? I mean if you're ok with that, I'd love to hear some of your mixes.'' His reply shocks me. I don't usually let anyone hear my mixes before they are done, but I guess I could let him, he could tell me if they're any good.
''Sure. Do you want the last one or?''
''Doesn't matter, I'm sure they're all awesome.'' He smiles at me and holds out his hand for the headphones in my hand. I smile back as I put on the headphones and turn on a mix. I start explaining my mix.
'' So, I just find songs that have the same chord progressions, and create a track that blends them together. So, like, this is the new bass line, and this is matching up downbeats.'', just then I realise I'm shouting and I start taking off my headphones. ''Oh, I'm talking really loud. That's me singing.'' Jesse takes the headphones from my hand and puts them on.
''This is really good. Now I'm the one yelling, right? That's amazing, Beca.'' He smiles at me and I'm glad. Someone who knows good music, likes my music.
''Thanks.'' I smile back at him.
'' So, I brought this over, because I wanna watch you watch the end of this movie. And then I can die a hero.'' He says taking The Breakfast Club case out of his backpack and puts it in his dark blue laptop. He lays back on my bed and puts the laptop in front. He looked as if he just came home.
''You have a habit of making yourself at home, did you know that?'' I tease him a bit.
''Yeah.'' He says as he motions me to come lay next to him. I stand up and walk over to the bed.
'' The Breakfast Club. 1985. Greatest ending to any movie ever. This song launched Simple Minds in the US. Could have been a Billy Idol song, but he turned it down. Idiot. Perfectly sums up the movie. It's equally beautiful and sad.'' He gives me the back story of the movie and by the look in his eyes I know this is definitely his favourite movie.
''That is fascinating.'' I say, to which he replies ''Right?'' I smile to myself, thinking about this boy.
'' Tell me, what does Judd Nelson eat for breakfast?'' I ask try to 'play along' as I don't get what the movie is about. Watching the end of the movie doesn't mean you know what's going on. The movie continues and I hear Jesse whispering. I look over to see his beautiful lips mouthing the lines of the movie. He raises his fist slightly and I smile, I could honestly picture myself with this boy.
''You're missing it.'' He turns his eyes look into mine and I reluctantly look away and turn towards the screen. I still feel those gorgeous eyes watching me and as I turn around, I can't find the strength to look away. He moves his head closer and I can feel his warm breath on my face. Go for it, Beca, you promised yourself. So I go for it. I close the gap between us and I can sense his surprise. He didn't expect I'd kiss him. I feel his soft lips on mine, his gentle kiss still lingering on my lips after the door opens and Kimmy Jin walks in with her two friends.
''This is my room too, Beca. Do that somewhere else. Let's go, guys.'' She says as they walk out the room and close the door behind them. When the door clicks, both Jesse and I burst out laughing. Both still laughing, Jesse captures my lips into another kiss. I put one of my hands around his neck and the other one finds its way to his hair, my fingers playing with it. His hands capture my waist and he pulls me closer. In one swift move, I close his laptop and slide it in his backpack. He pulls me in his lap and deepens the kiss. I fall on the bed, Jesse on top of me, both grinning like crazy. He kisses my neck softly and lays next to me.
''Wow. You always seem to leave me speechless, Bec.'', he says as I put my head on his chest, ''You don't know how long I've been waiting for that to happen.'' He kisses my hair and puts his arms around me. I raise my head and look into his loving eyes. He puts his hand on my cheek, gently caressing it. I reach to take his hand, moving it to my lips and softly kissing his palm.
''Where are we, Bec? What are we now?'' He whispers in my ear and I hear worry in his voice. Worried what I'd say, what I think we are.
''What do you want us to be? I agree to anything you say. Friends, friends with benefits, dating... I just care about you, Jess.'' I say and the worry in my voice is apparent, too.
''Ok, then'', he says a bit relieved, ''Beca Mitchell, will you marry me?''
''What?'' I jump to sit up, yelling. What is he talking about, what the-?
''Well, you said you agree to everything.'' I did, I did say that.
''I, I, I didn't mean-'' I say weirdly.
''Relax, Bec, I'm messing with you. Will you be my girlfriend?'' He chokes out because he's laughing too hard. I look at him and try to hold in a laugh, but I fail badly. I push him off the bed because no one messes with Beca Mitchell.
''Ouch! That's hurts. And it hurt my heart, too, as it seams that's a no...'' he gets up and reaches for his backpack.
''Oh, no you don't. Come back here, now!'' I order him playfully.
''Yes, ma'am.'' He says as he lays back and pulls me next to him.
''Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend, nerd.'' with that I cuddle closer to him.
''Just let's keep it to ourselves, ok? I don't need Aubrey telling me I'm not a Bella or something. At least until the season ends.'' I say looking up in his eyes.
''You actually think we are going to be together in 5 months, that I won't become a boring nerd? Can I go back to my previous statement? You still seem to leave me speechless.'' I was stunned at first but after realising what he meant I smiled and hugged him tighter.
''You won't leave, will you? I don't want you to leave. I have heard so many times that I had to let people in and I never seemed to do it because I knew that they would leave. When you came here, I made a decision to let you in and before I do that completely, I don't want you to leave. Stay, please.'' I say, shaking, tears threatening to fall.
''Hey, don't cry, I won't leave, Bec, come on, I could have left so many times had I wanted. I won't leave, believe me, I love you too much to do that, I'm not going to leave, don't worry.'' he says as he brings my lips to his. As our lips part, we both realise his words. He goes mute, knowing he can't take back what he said, and I just tense. He won't leave, don't shut him out, you promised, he won't leave you.
''I, I can't say that back, Jess, but I can tell you that I'm getting there. For now, I can tell you, I've never felt this way about someone. And I really don't want you to leave. I don't want to lose the only person I've ever liked this much.'' He kisses my forehead and starts playing with my locks.
''Let's sleep, Bec.'' he whispers in my ear and kisses my hair.
''Sing to me.'' I reply softly and he starts singing 'Just The Way You Are'
Her eyes, her eyes
make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
falls perfectly without her trying
With the sound of his angelic voice, with the touch of his soft lips, with his warm breath lingering on my skin, I fall asleep in his arms.