Shepard sat up with a gasp, her muscles straining from the nightmare she had just left. The sheen of sweat that clung to her hot body quickly cooled and she soon found herself shivering against the chill. She turned on the bed, placing her feet on the floor and grasping the mattress, steadying herself against the tremors that still resonated through her. She focused on taking deep, controlled breaths, willing herself to calm down.
After a few moments, her muscles released their tension and a soothing relief began to flow throughout her body. She sighed unhappily, running her hands over her face and through her hair. The nightmares were becoming an unwelcome ritual whenever she tried to sleep. Shepard cast a glance over her shoulder at Garrus. She smiled in relief when she saw him sleeping soundly. She was thankful she didn't wake him this time.
She entertained the thought of laying back in bed and sleeping more, but quickly dismissed it as she knew the image of the burning child would only continue to haunt her dreams. Shepard stood, grabbing the robe from the edge of the bed and wrapped it around herself. The light from the fish tank cast shadows of the fish as they swam leisurely about. She watched them for a moment with whimsical envy before striding over to the couch and reaching underneath it. She pulled out a simple metal case and set it carefully on the table as to not wake Garrus.
Shepard sat down and opened the case. As always, she was met with a series of pencils, color shades and other drawing tools. She picked up her sketch pad from the bottom of the case and chose a pencil. She flipped to a clean sheet and tapped the edge of the pencil to her lip, searching for inspiration. Her eyes landed on Garrus.
The Turian slept soundly, his head turned to the side. His arm lay carefree over his naked torso while the other one cocked up and disappeared underneath the pillow. The twisted sheets covered only one of his legs while the other dangled precariously at the edge of the bed. Shepard knew it was difficult for Garrus to get comfortable on the bed with her, but once he found his comfort zone, he was dead to the universe.
She admired how the low cabin light glowed off his metallic plates on his chest and wished that she could somehow capture that beauty in her sketches. She slowly began to outline him on the pad, drawing the whole of him before she began on the finer details.
When she was young and at the Academy, her instructors had encouraged her to find a hobby outside of Alliance life. She had tried many things at their behest, failing to take an interest in any extracurricular activities. It seemed that she was only good at one thing and that was being a soldier. In fact, she excelled at it beyond all expectations. One instructor had taken a special interest in Shepard and suggested she try to draw something. Shepard had been reluctant at first, but was even more so when she discovered that the instructor wanted her to use an actual pad of paper instead of a datapad.
After some firm persuasion, Shepard was astounded to discover that she had a natural ability to draw. Over the years, her self-taught technique had blossomed and she found herself drawn to her sketchpad for a release from day to day turmoils. It was as if her hand had a mind of its own. As she would sketch, her world would fall away and she would melt into her creations. The sound of the pencil scratching against the paper as she drew was soothing to her. It amused her that as a trained killer, the simple sounds of graphite brushing along paper could calm the roar of emotions she kept buried every single day.
She began to lose herself in the drawing, the burning child eons away. Her patience was unsurpassed in this state. It was almost as if she were meditating. She watched Garrus take form and come to life on the sketch pad. She changed pencils and began to shade in his metallic plates and the grooves of the scars on his mandible. As she drew him, she admired the slender, muscled construct of his waist and how it flowed up and widened into his chest. She had always found comfort against his chest. She was exactly the right height to lay her head against it. She began adorning his carapace with small light spatters of metallic plates. Finally, she made her way to his mandibles and set to work on defining his scars. She admired him from her position on the couch. He could never kiss her the way a human male could, but she would not trade it for the world. The skin on his mouth was taut, but smooth and soft against her own lips. She enjoyed the caress of his mouth on hers. She smiled, a warm feeling of pleasant comfort passing through her. He truly was her salvation.
She finished his face and focused on his hips and legs. His sharp hips protruded out in a silhouette forming under the tangled sheet. His thickly muscled leg dangled halfway on the bed now and his taloned toes flicked in a restless dream.
Shepard wondered what Turians dreamed about as she continued to sketch. Did they have nightmares? Shepard realized that Garrus never mentioned his dreams to her. She would have to ask him one day.
Shepard completed her drawing and regarded it thoroughly, adding a few finishing touches here and there. She was impressed with her work. She had captured him almost perfectly. She had never seen him so beautiful.
"Artemis?" Garrus stirred, reaching for the spot she usually occupied on the bed.
"I'm right here, Garrus," she called out softly.
He raised his head sleepily and gazed at her. "What're you doing over there? Is it time to get up already?"
She shook her head. "No, I couldn't sleep."
"Nightmares again?" He asked.
Shepard nodded, looking down at her sketch pad. "Yeah," she mumbled softly.
Garrus reached out for her. "Come here."
Shepard uncrossed her legs and set her sketch pad on the table. She walked over to the bed, shedding her robe before crawling into Garrus' awaiting arms. She snuggled against him, comforted by the warmth of his skin and his arms enclosed around her.
He nuzzled her hair and pressed his forehead to the top of hers. He ran a taloned finger lovingly over her cheek and jaw. "I'll keep you safe," he promised with a purr-like whisper.
She smiled, kissing his mouth and linking her fingers around the hand that caressed her face. "I know you will."
"They're just dreams," he whispered softly.
Shepard gave him a weak smile, her eyes betraying her sadness. "They won't go away." She turned her head so he wouldn't see the despair in her eyes. "I see it every time I close my eyes."
Garrus forced her face back firmly so that her eyes met his. "Then look at me, Shepard. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not letting you go."
Shepard sighed, squeezing his hand. "It's getting awfully dark in my head, Garrus."
Garrus knew what that meant. It meant that Shepard was beginning to succumb to the stress and pressure around her. He looked at her sympathetically, running his fingers through her hair. "I know. I see it in your eyes. What can I do?"
Shepard shut her eyes, fighting back the sadness. When she opened them again, she smiled at Garrus and reached out to stroke his mandible. "You do enough. You're my only light in this darkness."
"There has to be more I can do," he urged.
She kissed him. "Just stay with me, Garrus. No matter how bad it gets, don't leave."
"I already told you I'd follow you to hell and back," he murmured against her lips. "You won't ever get rid of me. You're stuck with me forever."
"I'm glad for that," Shepard whispered. She stared at him, relishing in the endless depths of love she saw reflected in his eyes.
"How did I ever get so lucky?" She mused, her hand trailing down his mandible and chest.
"Funny, I was just about to ask you the same thing," Garrus replied smoothly.
Shepard smiled and relaxed into him, feeling the darkness dissipate ever so slightly. "Turn over," Garrus whispered. "I'll give you something to help you sleep."
Shepard cocked her eyebrow and gave him a wry smile. "Oh, really?" She chucked.
Garrus lifted his mandibles in an adorable Turian smile. "Well, I meant a massage, but if you have something else in mind, I'm willing to oblige."
Shepard laughed and rolled over on her stomach, allowing Garrus' highly skilled hands to roam soothingly over her back and shoulders. He pushed the pads of his fingers down into her muscles, ever mindful of his talons. Shepard let out a few appreciative moans before being lulled by the repetitive motions back into a fitful sleep.
Garrus continued to lovingly stroke her back for a long time, watching her as she slept. After a while, Garrus laid back down and endeavored to get comfortable again. Just as he was about to drift off into sleep, he heard Shepard groan unhappily.
"Don't go," she muttered as she dreamt.
Garrus reached for her, pulling her to him and began stroking her hair. "I'll never leave," he whispered. After a moment, her brow which was knitted with consternation began to relax and Shepard sighed contentedly in her sleep.
Garrus kissed the top of her head in his way. "I love you, Artemis. More than anything in the entire galaxy. I'll protect you, no matter what." He chuckled slightly as he gazed down at her serene face. "I'll even protect you from yourself."