You're exhausted. Not just the regular 'oh, I could do with a nap' exhausted, but the deep, aching, mind-numbing exhausted. The kind that settles into your very bones and envelops you in a thick haze of confusion and sleep deprivation. You've just returned from a job, a relatively straightforward job but one that quickly descended into chaos and mayhem as soon as your teammates decided to tag along, and the last thing you want to be doing is standing in front of the Guild Master as Natsu struggles to justify why destroying an entire village was necessary. For the record, it wasn't.
You sway slightly, craving a long soak in the bath, preferably without the presence of your teammates, and a good book. You don't know how much longer you can stay on your feet. Summoning three of your celestial spirits in the heat of battle at once was foolish, however necessary, and you are now beginning to regret your decision greatly. You're out of magical energy and are running on sheer force of will and the knowledge that passing out on the floor in front of the Master is not very lady-like. And no matter how many jobs you take or how many brawls you're dragged into, you are still a Heartfilia lady. Old habits die hard.
Next to you, Erza unconsciously shifts closer, allowing you to lean against her. You like to pretend that she hasn't noticed your weariness but you know that very little slips pass the scarlet-haired mage. Your head droops onto her shoulder and you feel her body shudder in a silent chuckle. Affection for the armour-clad woman swells in your stomach. Erza is remarkably in tune with the needs of her team, possessing something akin to a sixth sense. Her habit of appearing exactly when needed, whether it be when you're in life threatening peril or even when you've fallen into the trap of challenging Cana to a shot-off yet again and need someone to carry your unconscious body back home, never fails to astound you.
Finally, the Master dismisses you, apparently realising that a reasonable explanation for the destruction of the village is not going to fall out of Natsu's mouth. You don't know why the old coot is so surprised. Nothing reasonable ever comes out of Natsu's mouth. The dragon slayer and his feline sidekick cheer enthusiastically at the dismissal, the rambunctious yelling jolting you out of your daze. Your head shoots up from Erza's armoured shoulder and you sheepishly, yet gratefully, smile at the woman. She merely tilts her head in acknowledgement, placing a supportive hand on your back. You take at step towards the door but exhaustion gets the better of you and you stumble. Your eyes squeeze shut, nervously awaiting impact with the floor. The dirty, wooden floorboards do not ever reach you, however. Instead you collide with the freezing cold flesh of a shirtless Gray, who whirls round just in time to catch you. You squeak in surprise, not having even noticed him strip and realise that you must be more tired than you had previously suspected. Master Makarov tuts like a disapproving grandfather, noticing your weary state for the first time.
"I really wish you children would stop overexerting yourselves," he sighs, "it will kill you one day, if Natsu's stupidity doesn't get there first."
Natsu shifts his concerned, and mildly amused, gaze from you to glare at the Master. The Master ignores him.
"I'll be fine," you utter, forcing a smile, "just need some sleep."
"Indeed," agrees Makarov, "I'm certain your team will be happy to escort you home safely and make sure you reach your bed."
"Aye, sir!" declares Happy rather unnecessarily.
You sigh. You love your team but you know as soon as they reach your apartment, there's no chance of them leaving. But then, you reason, maybe that's not such a bad thing. It scares you slightly, this neediness, this desire to be around them, and you don't really know where it's come from. Loneliness is something that has always been a constant in your life, even before the death of your mother. After all, no-one really wants to play with the rich kid and there was certainly no way your father would ever consider sending you to public school. It was only after meeting Natsu did you start to feel the loneliness ebb. And with Natsu came Fairy Tail, possibly the greatest thing that has ever happened to you in your relatively short life. You've become dependent on them, drawing strength from Erza, confidence from Gray and companionship from Happy and Natsu. It has reached the point where you genuinely don't know how to function without them.
Gray glances down at you and asks gently if you can manage the walk back to your apartment. You frown, knowing that it's unlikely, but determined not to reveal your weakness to your family. They know you too well, however, and in one swift movement, Natsu snatches you out of Gray's arms and swings you onto his back. You screech in surprise, your arms automatically clasping around his neck. Natsu laughs like a child at the surprise piggyback and races out of the room, Erza, Gray and Happy following behind at a more leisurely pace.
You think you might have fallen asleep during the walk home, a true testament to your tiredness as Natsu's piggybacks are usually loud, rambunctious and anything but smooth. The dragon slayer gently places you down at your front door and you groggily fumble for your apartment key. There's a bit of trial and error, you do after all, possess more keys than most people, but eventually the door swings open and you sigh in relief. You turn to your team, ready to suggest that they too go home and get some sleep. One look at their concerned faces, however, and you know they're not going anywhere. Using too much magic is a constant and incredibly dangerous risk for any mage. Levy showed you a Council study just last week that showed more mages die from accidental magic depletion than anything else. You came close to the edge today and, although it remains unspoken, your team know it. You doubt you'll be left alone tonight.
Gray bundles you into the apartment before you can protest, settling you on the bed and moving to the kitchen to make some tea. You shoot him a small smile of thanks but he merely shrugs. His chest is now covered, he must have found his shirt, and you grin at his bizarre stripping habit. You and Levy are convinced that the ice mage has some deep-seated psychological issues and have spent many an afternoon pouring over psychology books in the Guild library for answers. Needless to say, the search has been fruitless so far; after all, there is a reason that neither you nor the blue-haired mage possess a degree in the fine art of psychology.
You love Gray, however, despite his issues. He's got your back. There's an odd kinship between the two of you, stemming from the fact that you are the only members of the team whose parental figures are actually dead. Igneel is missing and there has never been a parental figure in Erza's life besides the Master who, in all his perverted glory, is most definitely still alive. The two of you look out for each other, practically adopting each other as siblings. And Gray plays the part of big brother remarkably well. When you're being supposedly 'wooed' by the numerous 'gentlemen' you meet on your travels, Gray is always there to issue threats and occasionally beatings to those who get rather handsy. In return, you often help him slip away from Juvia, whose obsession with your teammate both amuses and terrifies you. You occasionally find yourself fighting side-by-side with the ice-wielder and it is a completely different experience when compared to fighting with Natsu or Erza.
Natsu is a battle hog and likes to take all the glory for himself. You assume this behaviour stems from his raging inferiority complex which is likely to be a result of Igneel's departure, but once again, you're no psychologist. The dragon slayer likes to take out all the enemies by himself, proving his strength and his right to call himself Igneel's son. He's reckless, a trait that stresses you to no end, and fights with no consideration for his surroundings or his teammates.
Erza is the opposite. Her time as a slave has taught her that family is more important than anything else in the world and she will die before willingly placing hers in danger. You fall neatly into the category of 'Erza's family' and, as such, she will quite happily take the hits for you. On one hand, you're incredibly grateful, hits hurt after all, but on the other, her constant protection means it's difficult for you to grow as a mage and a warrior.
Gray, however, holds back when fighting by your side. Supporting you endlessly but letting you spread your wings and actually take out some of the bad guys. You can never express how truly grateful you are for this but you suspect you don't need to. Gray knows how you feel. He always knows.
You fall back on the bed, knowing you need a shower but uncertain you have the energy to actually make it to the bathroom. In the end, however, it doesn't matter as Natsu screams 'ME FIRST!' and races into the bathroom before anyone can protest, Happy following behind with a cheerful 'Aye, sir!' You blink once slowly, trying to comprehend why Natsu and the flying cat feel the need to shower together. The bed dips slightly, jolting you out of your musings and you turn your head to see Erza sitting next to you. She smiles at you fondly and accepts a cup of tea from Gray.
Erza is definitely the mother of the group, despite lacking the gentleness and sensitivity usually associated with female parental figures. You often think that if Mirajane and Erza fused together, they would form the ultimate mother but then the thought of Mira and Erza fusing in any way freaks you out slightly so you let it go. It's odd, Erza could not be any more different from your mother if she tried, she's brash, headstrong and practically has an aneurysm any time she's forced to show emotion. For the most part she's just like that really awesome, badass older sister who beats up all the boys who annoy you. But then there are times when you've been injured in a fight yet again and she sits you down, wipes away your tears and patches you up with a tenderness that seems alien on the mighty Titania. And it's during those times, if you close your eyes and imagine with everything you have, you can practically see your mother sitting there.
Of course, those moments never last for long as Big Sis Erza cannot be restrained and as soon as she's certain you are not dying, she's up and obliterating the poor, poor fools who thought it was a good idea to aim their attacks at you.
Gray offers you a cup of tea and Erza snakes a hand round your waist to help you sit up. Once you're upright, you accept the cup with a sheepish 'thanks' and take a sip. It's good but then you're not surprised. One of Gray's many skills is his fantastic tea making abilities. One does not grow up in an icy wasteland and not know how to make delicious hot beverages. The tea gives you a little boost of energy and you eye the ice mage suspiciously. He merely winks knowingly, confirming your suspicions that he has subtly slipped some sort of magical energy booster into your drink. The bathroom door bursts open, revealing a towel-clad Natsu and Happy and you use your newly found energy to jump off the bed and race to the bathroom before anyone else can get there first. Shoving Natsu out of the way, you slam the door shut, locking it with glee.
You don't shower for long, just long enough to remove the thin layer of grime that coats your body. You feel slightly anxious being away from your team in such a weakened state, despite knowing that you're only separated by a wall. And walls have proved to be poor opponents for your teammates in the past. That knowledge still doesn't erase your desire to be back with them, however, and the safety and warmth that envelops you when in their presence. You quickly hop out of the shower and don your pyjamas, shuffling out the bathroom and settling on the bed next to a now clothed Natsu.
Happy cheers at your reappearance and curls up in your lap. You sigh and hug the cat, his warm fur tickling your skin. Natsu laughs at the sight and you glare at him before tiredly resting your head on his muscular shoulder and closing your eyes. You owe Natsu everything. He was the one who plucked you out of your isolation, gave you a family, taught you how to embrace your inner strength and stop running from your problems. He was the one who showed you that real love, true love, is unconditional, something that you had never experienced in your short life. You love him, not quite in a romantic fashion, but in a deeper, truer way. You think you might have been soul mates in a previous life because as soon as you found him, everything just seemed right. He knows you, better than you know yourself, knows what drives you, what motivates you, knows your desire to be stronger, knows what keeps you awake at night. And you return the favour. He's your best friend and you'd die for him without hesitation.
You must have dozed off because when you open your eyes, Erza and Gray both look remarkably cleaner and are dressed in sleepwear. The floor is covered in blankets and pillows and Erza wastes no time in kicking Natsu off of the bed, declaring that it would be 'inappropriate' for him to share the bed with you. You suspect, however, that her intentions are not as noble as she makes out. The scarlet-haired mage would just rather not sleep on the floor. Natsu grumbles but knows that protesting is futile and slides onto the floor, glaring at an amused Gray. Erza nods in satisfaction, before glancing at your sleepy, confused face tenderly. You blink, attempting to school your features into something less childlike, but your friend merely chuckles and pulls back the duvet to allow you to crawl in, Happy still clutched in your arms like a security blanket. She slips in behind you and you allow yourself to relax for the first time since arriving home, content in the knowledge that she won't let anyone disturb you until you're back at full strength and able to stand on your own two feet.
Affection for your small makeshift family rushes over you and you suddenly have the urge to tell them, tell them how much they mean to you, tell them how grateful you are, tell them how hopelessly lost you would be without them. Your eyes well up and you struggle into a sitting position.
'Guys," you say, your voice thick, "I just want to-"
"Sleep, Lucy," groans Natsu, his voice muffled by his pillow, "sleeeeeep."
"But-"
"He's right, Lucy," murmurs Erza, placing an arm on your stomach and pulling you down so you're lying on the mattress again, "you overdid it today. You need your rest."
"We all do," sighs Gray, from his place on the floor beside Natsu, "so shhh."
"But I need to tell you-"
"We know," whispers Happy, curling up in your arms, "it's okay. We know."
"You do?"
"Aye," smiles the small cat, "and we love you too."
You laugh silently, Happy has condensed all your thoughts and musings into one simple, short sentence and you hug him tighter. Your eyelids droop and you sigh happily. Erza's arm is a comfortable weight on your stomach, a constant reminder that you aren't dreaming. Your family loves you, your family will always love you and your family are here. You don't know how you ever manage to live without these people and you know you can never go back. They've crawled under your skin like some sort of weird parasite and taken up residence in your heart. You sigh again, prompting another groan from Natsu.
"Sleeeeeeeep."
And this time, you do. And it's the best sleep you've ever had in your life.