Disclaimer: I don't own kick ass. This is purely a fan-based work, in which I assume no credit for any characters but those of my making. Kay thank ya

Chapter One- Secrets and Milkshakes, Lies and Spiderman

"You're trying to tell me that-that you're kick-ass? Like…Like…THE kick-ass?! WHAT THE FUCK DAVE?!"

I don't know if it was Marty's panicked and winded flipping out or just my insane head ache that caused me to make the face that I did, half wince half scowl I guess I would call it. I shook my head and sat down on my bed- Or what was left of it. A mattress rested atop a splintered frame. My entire house was a disaster. I was a disaster- and Marty I'm fairly sure was about to have a break down. This whole superhero bit has gone way too far- the people that are closest too me are dropping like flies, my whole shitty life has come crumbling to pieces and it's all because of me. Fuck you, Dave Lizewski, Fuck you.

I cradled my head in my hands, my elbows on my knees. I could feel blood running from my scalp onto my fingers, the warm sappy liquid that I have become all too familiar with. I watched as the floor spun beneath my feet, I could feel myself swaying back and forth almost mechanically.

I suppose I should fill you in up to this point, seeing as I don't think that any of you know particularly what's going on. Let's just say- I've had a week from hell…

It all started Saturday night. Me and Katie were meeting up with the rest of the Gang at steak n' shake. It had been awhile since we were all able to get together. Ever since school let out we have all been so preoccupied with college preparation amongst other things…other things, for me, being my Kick-ass bit, Which business is slow, but I like to think of it the way the McManus brothers from the Boondock saints put it:

"It's Like 711, we may not be doing business, but were always open"

Though, I guess the gap in my crime fighting days was a good thing- after the whole ordeal with Red Mist, Katie's been on my case constantly about how I'm going to get myself killed. Honestly, It'll probably happen one day. Hell- Its almost happened countless times already. But I can't stop. This is who I am, what I'm about….and besides- I have unfinished business.

For the past two months I've been attempting to track Red Mist. That fucker, allying with D'Amico, turning us in? We need a little heart-to-heart, and I'm not the only one who agrees. Mindy sees him as the last person she needs to take care of in order to let her father's memory rest. After all, if it wasn't for him, Big daddy might still be with us and she wouldn't be orphaned to live with Marcus.

So, it seems at this point that New York has its hero's, and it's hero's have their villains, but unlike the Green Golbin this little bitch goes into hiding when the going gets though. Sorry, I get a little peeved at the thought of him, but you have to cut me a break. He did betray me and almost get me killed, ya know? Not things that exactly blow over. But anyway, We were meeting up with the gang at Steak n' Shake. These days, the Gang consisted of me and Katie, Marty, Erika, Todd, and my "Cousin" Mindy. Of course, Mindy isn't really related to me, but I couldn't exactly not spend time with her and my friends needed an explanation as to why were hanging out with an obnoxious twelve year old.

The night started out normal enough, Katie picked me up around seven as usual. I hated the fact that my girlfriend had to drive me everywhere- but my dad's a real stickler for my safety ever since that "mugging" awhile back and wont let me get my license….little ironic if you consider my other recreational activities.

We pulled into Steak n' Shake- Marty and the others were already in the parking lot when we got out of the old station wagon. She came around the back of the car and walked up to me, smiling and taking my hand. I looked down at her with a grin of my own as we locked fingers. Todd came running up to us, everyone else on his heels.

"Hey guys!" He said, stopping just short of running into me. I shrugged and started walking towards the door of the restaurant.

"I thought you guys would have gotten a table by now" Katie said, thumbing the back of my hand as she followed. Their was something unearthly about how the summer wind played with her hair…

Before anyone could say anything Todd nodded to Marty and Erika, "These two were making their own cheep-ass porno in the parking lot that's why" .

I looked back at them and snickered, Erika's face was turning red and Marty looked like his team just won the super bowl.

"Todd you're a jackass, ya know that?!" Erika said, connecting her high heels with the back of Todd's knee in one swift kick. He stumbled but caught himself on the side of the building.

"Its true!" He said, pulling himself to a stand once more. "You guys were like two Fuckin leeches"

"Awe, is Todd jealous cuz he still whacks off to Buffy re-runs?" Marty smirked , looking accomplished as he put his arm around Erika. Todd tried to voice some objection, but I decided it was time to intervene at this point.

"That's enough guys." I said as I let go of Katie's hand and opened the door, gesturing her to walk through. She smiled and did so, shortly followed by everyone else, Marty and Todd still bickering to each other as they passed me. I shook my head and walked in as well, letting the glass door fall shut behind me.

The first thing I noticed when I scanned the restaurant was Mindy, sitting in our usual large booth in the corner, a scowl plastered across her young, fair face.

Ah, shit. I thought to myself. She's pissed about something.

I walked over and sat beside her, and Katie beside me. The other three piled into the side of the booth across from us.

"About time you guys decide to get your asses in here. I'll remember to bring a pressure washer next time so I can blast your faces apart" Mindy said, staring at Marty. Marty already knew by this point not to talk back to her, a thunder punch to the jewels took plenty care of that last time he tried to claim the last word. I decided to change the subject before it got sour.

"So, everyone…I have a confession. It's kind of why I asked you all to come here tonight…" I was nervous. I didn't know how everyone would take the news- but I couldn't exactly keep it to myself any longer. Katie leaned forward to look me in the eyes with a perplexed expression. I rested a hand on her arm before I continued.

"I uh…I'm moving at the end of August…" I could feel the tension in the room increase as everyone sat in shock. This is what I was expecting. "My dad says that with me being mugged last school year, and mom dieing…there isn't anything left for him here now. He wants to go back to North Carolina with his folks, so…unless I can find some way to get my own place, I have to go with him…"

Before I knew it Katie lunged herself at me bawling. I held her and tried to tell her it was alright, but it was hard to do with Mindy flipping out on me too

"You're what?! Moving?! Dave what the fuck are you think---" Mindy cut herself short so that she didn't accidentally reveal anything in her anger, but outrage seemed to radiate off of her.

"I know…I don't want to, believe me I don't. I'm going to try to find a way to stay here on my own, but I have to break the news to my dad yet that I don't want to leave. Im sure he'll fight me on it…but I'll be 18 in a few weeks and I might be able to work something out…" My voice was low. I rubbed Katie's back gently to try and calm her down. I could feel my shirt becoming damp with her tears. "Katie, Katie…hey…" I lifted her chin slowly so she could look at me. I smiled and kissed her lightly. "It'll be okay." I said as I pulled back slowly. She sat up, wiping her eyes free of tears and running makeup.

A few minutes passed in silence other then us giving our orders to the waiter. It was Erika that finally broke the tension.

"So, did anyone else hear that it was Chris D'Amico's dad that was killed in that huge gang shooting awhile back?" I nearly choked on my milkshake. Katie patted my back as everyone else looked at me like I was insane. Erika continued. "Yeah, that's what I said. I mean everyone always said his dad was a drug dealer and stuff but I never knew that he was that high up in the ranks, I mean shit."

Marty smirked. "It's cause the guy is a super genius. Fuck, buying and selling stash all day, making millions? Hell if you ask me the D'Amico's got it right. Aside from the dieing part you know. That's not a plus."

I could see the rage in Mindy's face and I nudged her under the table with my foot. She looked at me and I shook my head. She crossed her arms and leaned back into the cushion of the booth, staring at Marty with a look that could strike fear into dead men. But he didn't seem to notice, because he continued on,

"But I for one don't think that it was a gang fight."

I looked up at him immediately. "Well if it wasn't a gang fight then what was it?"

"Well, you have to look at the events of that day, dude. First, they try and say that Kick-ass is going to unmask himself on the internet? Okay that in itself is pure bullshit. That guy has a thing going for him, comics are being made after him, shirts, toys, everything. He's an icon. Why the hell would he end the mystery of it like that? And then we watched the so called unmasking and this group of guys starts wailing on him and some cheesy version of batman? Naw, guys, I think that Kick-ass tried to take down their operation and they wanted to humiliate him, but then that purple chick came and fucked it all up. Then shit went down and they probably went over to the D'Amico's to end it."

I was speechless. I looked at Katie to find that she was already looking at me, her eyes widened.

I snapped out of it when Mindy began laughing.

"You think that some scrawny guy in a green jumpsuit and some little ten year old with a dumb-ass wig went and took out a mob? You're a fucking loser, Marty get real."

"Well, MINDY, you have to look at the facts! " Marty began, "It all fits together! And have we heard from Kick-ass since? No, we haven't! He's probably laying low because of all this mob bull shit, trying to pull all the lose ends together! Like fucking Spider man after he realized that Gary out for his ass."

"Yeah , dude, that would make sense if there wasn't other things to consider. Like how the hell do you even know that those guys from the unmasking are even involved with D'Amico? How do you know it wasn't just a publicity stunt? Or maybe they were just some random guys that wanted to be famous so they figured they'd take down kick ass because he's a big deal? You're assuming too much shit." Todd shook his head and then continued, "Plus, even if all that shit was true wouldn't Kick-ass be walking around bragging about it? Like that Red Mist guy?"

"Red Mist captured a drug dealer, not mass murdered a few dozen guys. The police would throw his ass in jail if he came out and said it was him. And I don't know that they were for sure connected with D'Amico, Todd I'm just saying that there are way too many coincidences in this whole situation for them not to be connected." Marty, looking pleased with himself, shoved the last quarter of his hamburger into his mouth and smiled at Todd.

This was always where the duel life factor made things awkward. My friends didn't know that they were actually talking about me- and that they were pretty much right at that, and there was no way I could tell them. Not yet, not like this.

I shook my head and looked at Mindy. "So, were still dropping you off at Uncle Mark's right?"

Mindy turned her attention from Marty to me, still looking less then pleased. "Yeah, dad'll be mad at us if I'm not home by nine though…"

I nodded and then turned to Katie. "I guess we should be heading out then, huh?" out of the corner of my eye I could see Erika checking her phone.

"But it's not even eight yet, Dave." She said, looking up at me. I didn't have to explain myself, Katie did it for me.

" We were planning on catching a movie at nine, and If we have to take Mindy home before we head out then we should probably not wait around. We don't want to miss it or get there and have to sit like all the way in front or something." She said, taking my hand.

I nodded, though what Katie said was a complete lie. There was no movie, nor was there a curfew, though she did know that I had somewhere to be tonight, and all this talk about Red Mist had me pretty pumped for my little rendezvous. I just hoped that it wouldn't turn out to be something I would regret- not again.